The very worst contest idea EVER?
I’m afraid this isn’t going to end well.
A company that makes bug spray has launched “a nationwide search for Americaâ€™s biggest bug,” and they are offering cash prizes. I am not making this up.
“Got a roach the size of a small dogâ€¦a beetle the size of a van…” the contest site asks innocently enough.
Have these people never seen a summer movie before?
Are they totally unfamiliar with drive-in fare from the 1950s?
You know what? If I see a “beetle the size of a van,” I will be sprinting in the opposite direction, not trying to win their cheesy prizes.
It gets worse. You not only have to find and capture this behemoth, you have to put it next to one of their bug spray products and take a picture of it.
I want no part of this insanity. In the immortal words of the guy in Tarantula, “I never saw anything like it! No footprints! No blood! No sign of a struggle! The bones just stripped clean like peeling a banana!”