A skeleton crew of bikini models?

June 16, 2011

Ah, this is the life, right Lamar? Fashion Week in Brazil, where the women are gorgeous and shapely and we can really show off our most daring bikinis.

I hope you’ve gone all-out to get us some great-looking… OMG! What do you call THAT?

That’s our bikini model, Boss. Too fat?

Lamar, you dimwit! No woman is going to buy one of our swimsuits to try and look like that bony twig! Cripes, I’m afraid she’ll have a wardrobe malfunction when her shoulder blade cuts through the bra strap!

Don’t be so negative, Boss. Give me a couple of days of feeding her doughnuts and milkshakes nonstop, and we can bulk her up to a size zero. Trust me, she’ll be up to 70 pounds by Monday.

And besides, how was I supposed to know she was too thin?

Well Lamar, one giveaway might have been the way her shoulder tattoo shows up in reverse on her other shoulder.

Join the Oddly Enough blog network

Follow this blog on Twitter at rbasler

A model presents a creation from Movimento’s Summer 2012 collection during Sao Paulo Fashion week in Sao Paulo June 14, 2011. REUTERS/Paulo Whitaker

More stuff from Oddly Enough


We welcome comments that advance the story through relevant opinion, anecdotes, links and data. If you see a comment that you believe is irrelevant or inappropriate, you can flag it to our editors by using the report abuse links. Views expressed in the comments do not represent those of Reuters. For more information on our comment policy, see http://blogs.reuters.com/fulldisclosure/2010/09/27/toward-a-more-thoughtful-conversation-on-stories/

Carpenter’s dream. You better get her doughnuts – STAT!

The reverse tattoo really has me laughing out loud. And thanks for not showing the bottom half of that second picture. I’m not sure who wins for the ugliest back – her or “Twig” Zellweger: http://blogs.reuters.com/oddly-enough/20 11/05/06/ive-got-your-back-renee/

Posted by Dave_not_dave | Report as abusive

You know, she would have been fine with one of those beige rectangles.

Heck, if you put a moustache on her and trimmed the hair, she could go topless and no one would notice.

Posted by skeres | Report as abusive

@skeres, she could BE one of those beige rectangles!

Ok you know what, here..just look at this instead…

http://blogs.reuters.com/oddly-enough/20 11/03/04/welcome-to-brassieres-101-ladie s/

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

@jclim – that’s just creepy.

Posted by Dave_not_dave | Report as abusive

She is too thin
to lift her chin
its a punishment
of unspoken sin

@Spin: Your views on above please 😀

Posted by fwd079 | Report as abusive

Is her tattoo of a butterfly with concussion?

Posted by CrowGirl | Report as abusive

Not a real tattoo, I suspect. Not a real body either, unless you fancy sharp corners.

Posted by DoctorDoll | Report as abusive

A haiku for the defense:

Just because she’s thin
does not mean she suffers from

Posted by AllThatJazz | Report as abusive

Cam’s brother got into his sisters’room again….when will she lock her door?

Posted by Wheelz2 | Report as abusive

Oh for God’s sake, eat SOMETHING, woman!!!!

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

@Wheelz – when you’re that skinny, I doubt a locked door will keep you out 😉

Posted by GeorgiaPeach | Report as abusive

It’s fugly to be that skinny. Sometimes i wonder how the clothes don’t just slide down off their bodies when they’re so thin. I’m sure they use some adhesive or cellotape.

Posted by Malteser | Report as abusive

She is very thin –
I can barely see her skin..
That’s a skeleton!

Posted by Malteser | Report as abusive

@Spin: Thanks, going to try but can’t write it often, difficult thing, hence asked you :)

Posted by fwd079 | Report as abusive

One more:

If this gal stuck out
her tongue and turned sideways she’d
look like a zipper!

Posted by AllThatJazz | Report as abusive

Thanks for your comment Spin.. I’m also new to haiku.. i guess rhyme is not needed so long as,…wait.. this might end up in a zapper.

Five and Five
And a seven in between:
You have a haiku!

…right? 😉

Posted by Malteser | Report as abusive

I thank thee Spin for helping me,
As I am just a newbie, see!
But I should not learn –
Or a zap I’d earn,
For Shra’s zapper won’t leave us free!

Posted by Malteser | Report as abusive

{haha…seems so far we kept this under the radar… that’s a zap-limitation it seems, poetry is spared…) 😉

Posted by Malteser | Report as abusive

You’re on a roll Spin, good one!

These models inspire;
With their weird attire,
skinny physiques,
and bony cheeks –
The need for doughnuts is dire!

Posted by Malteser | Report as abusive

A zap on the tosh might be
Quite Continental
But doughnuts are an OE’s best friend
A zap is not a brand
though it might seem really grand
it would help you from learning
also warn you from teaching
Doughnuts grow cold as OE bloggers grow old
And we all lose our wits in the end
But sprinkled or not these doughnuts don’t lose their Doughnuts are an OE’s best friend!

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

[…] 1. A skeleton crew of bikini models? […]

Posted by The top 10 posts for a goofy June… | Oddly Enough Blog | Report as abusive

Seeing this again I realise that my haiku (above) starting “Five and Five” was not, really, a haiku. Hehehe

Posted by Malteser | Report as abusive