Oddly Enough Blog

News, but not the serious kind

The unpaid working for the undead?

June 25, 2011

Blog Guy, I really want to get into the movie business. Can you help me out?

I suppose I can pull a few strings and get you an unpaid production assistant job on “World War Z,” that new zombie movie starring Brad Pitt.

Wow! I would get to be Brad Pitt’s assistant?

Slow down, Speedy! No, you get to assist the zombies. Stack them in a truck, drive them from scene to scene, use a pitchfork to put them where they belong, and so on.

Can’t they just lurch from place to place?

Hardly. They may be the walking dead, but they are still stars who want to be pampered.

This sounds like very menial work, Blog Guy. I wanted to use my brains.

Trust me, when you’re working with zombies that isn’t really what you want.

So to make sure I understand, this is an unpaid grunt job, waiting on zombies? Any advice for me?

Yeah, take an umbrella to the set every day.

Why would I always need an umbrella?

You know what they say about working with Zombies. “When it brains, it pours…”

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Top: Models of corpses arrive on the back of a truck on the film set of World War Z in Valletta June 21, 2011.

Left: A film crew member carries models of corpses on the film set of World War Z in Valletta June 21, 2011.

A film extra dressed as a zombie takes an umbrella on the film set of World War Z in Valletta June 21, 2011.

REUTERS photos by Darrin Zammit Lupi

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Comments

there are zombies on the north side of town here. My side of town gets the vampires. This area is getting really popular with TV & film crews.

Posted by GeorgiaPeach | Report as abusive
 

The Zombie Apocalypse approacheth. Those chaps in the first picture look like they experienced Shra’s taser one too many times.

Posted by Dave_not_dave | Report as abusive
 

First photo: “8 of hearts, 10 of diamonds, 4 of clubs….”

Posted by DoctorDoll | Report as abusive
 

@GeorgiaPeach, which kind of vampires? Real vampires (Buffy, Angel,The Lost Boys) or fake vampires (Twilight)? It’s unfortunate that these days we have to differentiate.

Little zombie Fufu “Aaarrg”-ing through the meadow. I took my M4 Carbine and shot it through the head.

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive
 

@Mr. Pilot – these would be Mystic Falls vampires. Broody, but not sparkly. I started watching the show for the location shots, but it’s actually pretty good. Haven’t watched any of The Walking Dead yet, but I’ve heard it’s good.

I watched the first Twilight movie…meh. Not my thing.

Posted by GeorgiaPeach | Report as abusive
 

Zombie day,
Saturday afternoon,
Think I’ll pick my feet up
Run and flee!

Someone’s brains
Are what they’re out to eat,
Must be brains
’cause feet were last week!

Aaaaargh. Aarrgh aargh aargh aargh.

With a nod of my still attached head to the Moody Blues.

Posted by Onedoor | Report as abusive
 

I may have to watch Fido again.

Posted by Onedoor | Report as abusive
 

“Can’t they just lurch…?” Love that line. Pure poetry, Mr B.

Posted by ladylala | Report as abusive
 

Darn you Mr. Pilot – Now I can’t get that tune out of my head. My daughters used to love it (MANY years ago)

Posted by inebgreen | Report as abusive
 

I will say that being a PA to a Zombie must be hard work… They’re so demanding and hard to clean up after. I think I’d get tired trying to hide all the bodies. But then I guess the bodies would just get up and walk away themselves so maybe it wouldn’t be all that bad ;)

Posted by CdnZmbiRytr | Report as abusive
 

@GeorgiaPeach, I am not familiar with Mystic Falls vampires but as long as they do vampire-y things and don’t sparkle then they seem legit.

@inebgreen, sorry aboot that. Do your daughters know the classic Jack Be Nimble also? Ya know,
Jack be nimble,
Jack be quick,
So from a zombie Jack won’t be bit!

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive
 

@ifly and inebreen: I think we owe it to our fellow readership to render the original song (best lyrics I know, short of Sondheim):
Little Rabbit Foofoo
Hoppin’ through the forest
Scoopin’ up the field mice
Bop ‘em on the head.

That’s the best I can do from memory of my nieces and nephews. Please add or correct.
PS Anybody know “You Gotta have Skin” (to the tune of “You gotta have Heart”)?
I love how this blog promotes discussion of serious music.

Posted by ladylala | Report as abusive
 

The undead star in
another flick with Brad Pitt.
Brains are not required.

Posted by AllThatJazz | Report as abusive
 

Brad could have saved so much had he come down to England…
the folks are ever-ready to show their city how ill prepared they are for a Zombie attack..

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive
 

It’s nice to see a blog featuring something in my home country… As regards being ill-prepared, Shra, I think you’d find Malta to be a very good competitor to England in that field…

PS: Dave_not_dave… I DO get a lot of zapping you see, and I am Maltese…you do the maths.

Posted by Malteser | Report as abusive
 

Malt, very tempting to come down to Malta…
Say, are there zombies everywhere or I could hide somewhere and get a decent rest?

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive
 

According to unreliable sources, those aren’t models of zombies at all – they’re government employees that someone rounded up.
I think the first photo shows DMV employees, just as they appear in their office.

Posted by Nosmo_King | Report as abusive
 

Ah, rubbish. I was hoping the first photo was actually for a zombie bobsled movie. :(

Posted by CrowGirl | Report as abusive
 

They want to stay pretty for a little while longer, Spin.
Being the walking dead isnt an easy job what with the fast decomposition, and the ghastly stink and all.. you know..

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive
 

Shra, I’m sure with your zapper you’d be quite fine here. Then again, I never saw a zombie being educational and/or learn anything. When was the last time you saw a graduate zombie. They all end up on a catwalk eventually, or at a chop shop.

If you do come to Malta though, I’m sure you could find somewhere to go and enjoy yourself. We got shoe shops here after all.

Posted by Malteser | Report as abusive
 

@Malteser – those shops wouldn’t be run by small blue people with torn clothes, with a blank expression on their face? You know the ones I mean, the zombie Smurf stores?

Posted by Nosmo_King | Report as abusive
 

Oh no, rest assured no smurf would be allowed to trade in shops here. You might find Popeye here though,…google popeye village malta. Just saying, not teaching..

Posted by Malteser | Report as abusive
 

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