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Blog Guy, I need your advice on my dating life. I’ve tried everything, but can’t seem to get guys to notice me.
Have you tried tobacco?
Smoking? Gosh, so many people do that, nobody would even care if I did it.
No, not smoking. Have you tried jamming the tobacco right up your nose? That’s a very chic, very sophisticated look.
How much would I have to stuff up there?
A lot. Tobacco sniffing isn’t for weenies. I would suggest five pounds.
Wow! Five pounds up my nose? Okay, I’m cramming it up there now. It’s getting hard to breathe…
Gasp. I’m up to three pounds now… Two more to go… Gasp. Man, this is tough…
Well, you just keep going if you want to improve your…. Oh, wait. Did I say five pounds?
I think I meant five GRAMS, which may be less. Hello? Miss? You still there?
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Top: Waltraud Leitner is pictured after stuffing tobacco in her nose during the German tobacco sniffing championship in the little Bavarian village of Kucha near Nuremberg June 25, 2011. About 220 men and women tried to get as much tobacco, at a maximum of five grams, as they could in their nose in one minute.
Right: Lidwina Weiss stuffs tobacco in his nose during the German tobacco sniffing championship in the little Bavarian village of Kucha near Nuremberg June 25, 2011.
Left: People stuff tobacco in their noses during the German tobacco sniffing championship in the little Bavarian village of Kucha near Nuremberg June 25, 2011.
REUTERS photos Michaela Rehle
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those wacky Germans! Americans were spending their time wisely…trying to set a new hot dog eating record. Way to go, Joey Chestnut!!!
interesting. The tobacco resembles a Hitler mustache. I bet the sneezing that followed was NASTY!
You can pick your friends. You can pick you nose. But you can’t pick your friend’s nose. Pick a winner…Join the OE Blog Network!
And here I thought Lidwina is a girl’s name..
Sadly this is no longer confined to just being a sport. Due to an unexplained worldwide shortage of tobacco pouches, folks all over Europe now have to store their tabaccy in their schnoz.
Germans – what a bunch of brown-nosers!
I wonder…were they allowed to make space before starting the stuffing?
Wow. Words are just not adequate to… BLEGH! There. That’s better.
Too icky…
BG, you’re supposed to let us know about these things in advance so we can plan our free time accordingly. This wonderful event was right in my back yard…and I could have seen it! Perhaps next year, I can meet Lamar if he comes to cover the event!!!
Jibberish, you stay in one of the 3 European states I most frequent! Say, what’s ur address?
Ich wohne in Nürnberg!
Come visit.
@Shra – so the three states are: Germany, Liquid, and Comatose, right?
Wow, tobacco up the nose. What will they think of next?
Wait, I’m not sure I want to know.
So what’s the purpose of the choker? To ensure that none of the tobacco makes it to the lungs? That stuff causes cancer, you know…
Dave, I’m right there with you. BLEGH!!!
Incidentally, Waltraud kind of looks like she regrets what she just did to herself. Not winning, I mean. I would tear up a bit too.
Jibberish, I had my wisdom teeth extracted in Nurembburg. Good times. A relative of mine lived there for a time after WWII. He found the whole Nuremburg experience rather trying.
Sorry, Nuremberg.
Nosmo, you forgot SHOESSSSS!
I don’t even think that “little Bavarian village” is a reasonable excuse for this. I’ve lived in several different back end of nowheres my whole life, and I’ve never seen anyone resort to nose stuffing for fun. Gurning, alcohol and horse tranquilisers; yes, but tobacco up the nose?!
Snuff used to be sniffed through the snozz. Whatever happened to snuff, opposed to what people call snuff, or more acturately, ‘In the jaw cancer causer’ nowadays?
I have an idea. Take some ground glass and inhale it rapidly. What a rush! I mean, what a rush before you internally bleed to death with a self imposed nose bleed.
I was raised in Tennessee, lived and worked in the cattle industry in South Texas and North Carolina and have been among tobbacco users for all of that time and all I can say is…
…BLEGH! (I’m right with there with you, too, Dave.)
A couple of years ago, the wife of one of my cousins calle dme up and said she was divorcing my cousin. Her complains? “I just can’t take it anymore! He has a beer gut, he’s drunk all the time, and he chews tobacco!”
Interesting, Doc. So did you ever find out what her complaint was?
I bet this guy could’ve gotten 5 lbs of tobaccy in his schnoz! http://blogs.reuters.com/oddly-enough/20 11/06/28/the-most-romantic-protests-ever /
When I saw the first photo, I thought it was one of those old kids’ toys. The kind that had a little magnetic wand that you could use to move the metal shavings around to make mustaches and eyebrows and stuff on the face on the board.
Then I read what it really was…
Icky, icky tobacco nose picky!
@DoctorDoll, your pun seems to have been lost in the shuffle. But I got it!
Thanks, Jibberish. I actually really enjoyed Nuremberg, as I do all Bavarian cities. One must love a place where beer drinking is an art form! I took some license with my ancester. he was actually tried in Nuremberg, but in a small town in Lower Saxony.
Where did my “not” go? “He was was actually not tried in Nuremberg, but in a small town in Lower Saxony.”
Knit_Nurse is in Lower Saxony at the moment.
So, Knit_Nurse committed war crimes?
Nosmo, I was thinking more along the lines of Germany, Netherlands and Italy, but your interpretation sounds quite good too..
By the way, does anyone stay in France? Preferably, the south of France?
Nice is nice. Provence is not to be missed. I could spend a year there. You might watch two films by Claude Berri, filmed in Provence: Jean de Florette and its sequel, Manon des Sources (Manon of the Spring). Great films both. The Provecal “French” has a delightful Italian twang.
Jeez Doc, why don’t you just beg Shra to zap you?
Since you mentioned Nice, Doc, yup, thats where I am off to.. with a squeezed in visit to Monaco..:)
As for the zap.. well, u did mention French films..
zaapppp!
Not that I know of Doc, but give her a chance, she only went on Tuesday…
And both of those films you mentioned are well worth a zap to see.
Forgot everything and get ready for a journey. Through travelling you can meet different type of human being. This help you to learn how to impress guys. So hire a car and start your journey.
Sumimohan