Oddly Enough Blog

News, but not the serious kind

Creepy gets a whole lot creepier

October 3, 2011

Okay, this story is so disturbing I’m not sure where to begin.

A city in Turkey has equipped the local morgue with the latest gadgetry in case any of the bodies stored there have been declared dead by mistake.

It seems alarms and motion detectors in the mortuary will detect the slightest movement if one of the bodies emerges from a coma or unconsciousness.

The story says they took this precaution because the locals are afraid of being buried alive.

Well, who the hell isn’t?

But I think a more important point here is that the story says the town isn’t otherwise known for its modernity.

So, let me get this straight. This cutting-edge technology is going to be put in the hands of people who apparently have trouble figuring out for sure whether I’m dead or alive?

It gets better. The morgue’s refrigerators are being fitted with interior door handles to allow their occupants to climb out of their coffins and open the doors. Seriously.

All I know is this. I would pay good money to be there watching on a moonless night, with thunder pounding and lightning flashing outside, when, with an eerie creak, that refrigerator door starts to open….

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Top: “The Premature Burial,” 1854.

Right: Actress Eliza Dushku in a 2004  publicity photo from her television series “Tru Calling,” in which she portrays a clairvoyant young morgue attendant.

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Comments

In the olden days they’d bury a person with a string attached to a bell topside in case they’d made a mistake and wanted to let the bereaved know they were still kickin’.

Of course they failed to consider that those coming back might be the undead rising.

Still if I had Eliza waiting for me…(Better her than Buffy with a pre-sharpened stake.)(Then again, Eliza was a Slayer once, too.)

Posted by FriscoJohn | Report as abusive
 

“Emergency Services, how may I help you?”
“Yes, there’s been an accident… I think my husband’s dead!”
“Are you sure ma’am?”

*BANG*BANG*BANG*

“Now I am…”

Posted by Malteser | Report as abusive
 

My main question is, does the high-tech equipment detect zombies?
It’s all very well detecting people that are still alive, but if I were working in a morgue I would REALLY want to know if someone is undead.

Posted by Nosmo_King | Report as abusive
 

I can just feel the calling… ;-)

Posted by fwd079 | Report as abusive
 

Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Imma.

Imma who?

Imma kinda cold, could you turn the heat up, please?

Posted by justCAM | Report as abusive
 

this is a good reason to take up running. Sure, I’m a slow runner. But I can still outrun a zombie. Anyway, zombies HATE fast food! :P

Posted by GeorgiaPeach | Report as abusive
 

I have two comments in one:

I noticed that this post has a typo that says, “I’t gets better.” Blog Guy, may I suggest that you safely bury that apostrophe and call it dead?

I humbly offer a haiku:
Oops–buried alive
But can now leave the coffin
Convenient for all

Posted by 69Spinster | Report as abusive
 

Is it time for the ZA already? Somebody dish up some brains – no, not for me, as bait!

Posted by Dave_not_dave | Report as abusive
 

@justCAM:
Nice joke unless you’re in a crematorium.

Posted by FriscoJohn | Report as abusive
 

Thanks, Spin. I’ve fixed i’t now…

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive
 

Thanks, Blog Guy. I’t is a good thing to be gone.

Folks, did you see this important information? They must not use the English word “zombie” in Turkey, or this map would be different: http://www.guardian.co.uk/news/datablog/ 2011/sep/23/zombie-map-world

Posted by 69Spinster | Report as abusive
 

BG must have a southern accent. Y’all know what I mean? I’t seems obvious to me. :D

Posted by GeorgiaPeach | Report as abusive
 

@Frisco … Thanks, it is kinda warm down here (in the South, you know). ;-)

Posted by justCAM | Report as abusive
 

The hottie sitting on the morgue gurney reminds me of a woman, “Jewels,” I went out with a few times in college. She wanted to be a mortician. After we stopped dating, one of her friends cornered me at a party and drunkenly and loudly asked “Did Jewels wanna do it in a coffin? Is that why you broke up? I’d a done it in a coffin afore I let her go!”

Posted by DoctorDoll | Report as abusive
 

Ring in the zombie
apocalypse – give them all
an easy exit

Posted by AllThatJazz | Report as abusive
 

Am I really selfish, or am I the only one who thinks it’s actually a BAD idea to let the people out of the fridge in case they’re not quite dead? I vote against the interior door handles.

Posted by grok | Report as abusive
 

Well Doc?
DID she?!

Posted by CrowGirl | Report as abusive
 

haiku double:
Spin shows zombie map
Escape the zombie ‘poclypse
Learn to speak Turkish

Refrigerated
or definitely deceased?
Ship ‘em to Turkey

Posted by jclimacus081 | Report as abusive
 

It’s kinda odd that you would post a blog that contains not but a single photo of Eliza Dushku. No complaints or anything don’t get me wrong but it’s not your usual MO. Your blogs tend to have words and stuff also. What’s your angle here hmm?

@Friso, yes Faith was also a slayer but she did go rogue remember. And she was a bit…freaky also if you catch my drift. So there’s that. ;)

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive
 

@Crowgirl: I wonder why Doc didn’t put that in a new noir?
Either way he’s left us hanging…

Posted by jclimacus081 | Report as abusive
 

Out of the ‘frig to put a move on the attendant and he tenderly touched her cheek.
His cold hand did startle – a back step she took.
He exclaimed, “I’m not a dead freak!”
“My cool hand is only a fluke.”

Posted by Onedoor | Report as abusive
 

Doc and Crowgirl – Didn’t you ever read the book “Sex After Death… or, How to Get Laid in a Coffin”

Posted by inebgreen | Report as abusive
 

J. was a very interesting young woman, but I don’t think she was THAT interesting. Although, now that I think about it, she did end up majoring in American history. Maybe that throws some light on the subject. Last I heard, she married some working stiff and had babies.

Posted by DoctorDoll | Report as abusive
 

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