Oddly Enough Blog

News, but not the serious kind

What’s this-here doohickey for?

October 27, 2011

Blog Guy, I could use some of your famous career advice.

My mom gave me a glossy brochure entitled, “The Glamorous Field of Dismantling Old Nuclear Bombs,” and I signed up for their training course.

It’s real interesting, but I wondered what you thought of that career path?

Well, I do know the U.S. is currently dismantling some of our old nuclear weapons, so I guess there should be opportunities.

I see that they took apart the oldest nuclear bomb in our Cold War arsenal, one of the most powerful ones ever built, just this week. So they are training you, huh?

Oh sure! They don’t just hand us our sledge hammers and blowtorches and chainsaws and what-not unless we get at least a C in the two-day course.

Whew, that’s a relief. And it’s hands-on training?

You bet! We got bombs all over the place here. Say, I wonder what happens if I flip this gizmo here and then push the

Join the Oddly Enough blog network

Follow this blog on Twitter at rbasler

Top: Workers examine a B53 nuclear bomb at the B&W Pantex nuclear weapons storage facility outside Amarillo, Texas, in this handout photograph taken and released on October 25, 2011. The United States dismantled the oldest nuclear bomb in its Cold War arsenal — and one of the most powerful it ever built — on Tuesday as part of President Barack Obama’s nuclear security policy. REUTERS/Photo Courtesy B&W Pantex/Handout

Right: Production technicians conduct a training class on the B53 bomb in this handout taken October 19, 2011 and released October 20, 2011. REUTERS/National Nuclear Security Administration/Handout

Left: The shredded remains of a B53 nuclear bomb are pictured at the B&W Pantex nuclear weapons storage facility outside Amarillo, Texas, in this handout photograph taken on September 11, 2007 and released on October 25, 2011. REUTERS/Photo Courtesy B&W Pantex/Handout

More stuff from Oddly Enough

Comments

they shred nuclear bombs?!? Wow! That is a powerful shredder.

Join the OE Blog Network…the nuclear family you WANT to spend time with!

Posted by GeorgiaPeach | Report as abusive
 

… and from here they are then turned into a Toyota Prius.

Posted by Nosmo_King | Report as abusive
 

@Georgia: Isn’t that pronounced Nuke-U-Lar?

Where is Dr. StrangeBlog (or how I stopped worrying and learned to love the bomb) when we need him?

Posted by FriscoJohn | Report as abusive
 

I think we are more of an extended family, than a nuclear one, Georgia..
Oh wait, you meant THAT nuclear.. oh well, sure we are!

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive
 

hey, Frisco…your Texas is showing ;)

Posted by GeorgiaPeach | Report as abusive
 

You say nuke-u-lar
And I say nuclear
Let’s call the whole thing off

Posted by 69Spinster | Report as abusive
 

Oh my gosh! I wanna go on that training course; just so I can list it on my CV! Where do I sign up, Baz?

:P

E.

Posted by egeria | Report as abusive
 

Not so fast, egeria. First, they send you one to dismantle in your home, to make sure you have the aptitude….

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive
 

Sounds as if Lamar were in charge of this training program.

Posted by 69Spinster | Report as abusive
 

@Spin: The Blog Guy’s likely to go nuclear if we start singing that song again :P

Posted by jclimacus081 | Report as abusive
 

@jclimacus: Good point. We should go back to reforming songs from musicals.

Posted by 69Spinster | Report as abusive
 

@Spin: What a good idea, think I’ll get cracking on that

Posted by jclimacus081 | Report as abusive
 

I humbly offer a haiku:

“What’s this doohickey?”
I asked my trainer, Lamar
“No! Not that!” and boom!

Posted by 69Spinster | Report as abusive
 

Looking at the name of the bomb, I guess it didn’t come from Planet Claire. That was the prior bomb.

Posted by 69Spinster | Report as abusive
 

I had no idea that the way to Amarillo was lit by nuclear bombs…

Posted by CrowGirl | Report as abusive
 

Usually, the doohickey is next to a thingamabob. Neither one will likely provide you the results you expect.

Posted by Dave_not_dave | Report as abusive
 

If the job is to big for a thingamajig, you can handle the job with a thingamabob. Doohickies are another topic entirely.

Posted by inebgreen | Report as abusive
 

@CrowGirl: I’ll give it a try. Apologies to Burt Bacharach and Dionne Warwick.

Do you know the way to Amarillo?
I might’ve been passing through, but kept on going to Dalhart.
Do you know the way to Amarillo?
I need a place where I can blog and not depart.

Just ask the OE Blog fellow.
He posts a pic and we just wallow.
In an hour or so comes humor gallow.
Than after that a song might be born
And all the bloggers that never blogged
Are posting their from night to morn.

You can really blog in Amarillo
And learn a trade, something like disarming nukes
Get a hammer and a screwdriver
Orange juice and vodka not a fluke.
Fun and glory is what we find
And blogging helps pass the time.
With poetic license you can turn a phrase
Words pour out and waltz away
So there you are without a care
You hit Enter and blog away.

PanTex is a real nice factory
Disarm a B53 and you’re a star.
Make the nuke, or two, into a hybrid car.
Shredding optional, next wait for the B54.
And all those bombs still to come
Blog on, have I gone too far?

I’ve got lots of friends in Amarillo.
Do you know the way to Amarillo?
Can’t wait to get back to Amarillo.

Posted by FriscoJohn | Report as abusive
 

Nah it’s not a nuclear bomb. It’s just an old crapper-tank from an RV that some skateboarders slapped a bio-hazard band sticker on.

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive
 

Reminds me of Spider-Pig’s crap-filled silo Homer tried to dump into Lake Springfield…

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive
 

Ahhhh, so that explains the smoke in my house Wednesday, Baz. And here I thought it was the fire next door. Tut tut, I’ll know better next time!

:D

E.

Posted by egeria | Report as abusive
 

Another contribution for the OE Musical…we really ought to save all these songs…This time, apologies to Tom Jones…

Spy on them POTUS use satellite
Infrared to see them move through the night
Aim gonna fire shoot them right
I’m gonna like the way they fight

Now you found the secret code I use
to blast away their lonely blues
So I can’t deny or lie cause they’re
the only one we will make’em fly.

Chorus:
A-bomb, H-bomb, it’s a big bomb!
You can shred it for me, when I need to make it go,
A-bomb, H-bomb, it’s a big bomb!
And baby please don’t turn it on.

No don’t get me wrong ain’t gonna do you no harm (no)
This bomb’s for lovin’ just don’t ask that Lamar though,
There’s no real target but come help tonight,
Let’s shred this A-bomb right!

Make it explode and oh you’ll know
your route to jail it won’t be slow
And yes, I must react to claims of those
who say that you are not all that.

Posted by Malteser | Report as abusive
 

Thank you Frisco, I knew someone would. :)

Posted by CrowGirl | Report as abusive
 

Post Your Comment

We welcome comments that advance the story through relevant opinion, anecdotes, links and data. If you see a comment that you believe is irrelevant or inappropriate, you can flag it to our editors by using the report abuse links. Views expressed in the comments do not represent those of Reuters. For more information on our comment policy, see http://blogs.reuters.com/fulldisclosure/2010/09/27/toward-a-more-thoughtful-conversation-on-stories/