Oddly Enough Blog
News, but not the serious kind
What’s this-here doohickey for?
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Blog Guy, I could use some of your famous career advice.
My mom gave me a glossy brochure entitled, “The Glamorous Field of Dismantling Old Nuclear Bombs,” and I signed up for their training course.
It’s real interesting, but I wondered what you thought of that career path?
Well, I do know the U.S. is currently dismantling some of our old nuclear weapons, so I guess there should be opportunities.
I see that they took apart the oldest nuclear bomb in our Cold War arsenal, one of the most powerful ones ever built, just this week. So they are training you, huh?
Oh sure! They don’t just hand us our sledge hammers and blowtorches and chainsaws and what-not unless we get at least a C in the two-day course.
Whew, that’s a relief. And it’s hands-on training?
You bet! We got bombs all over the place here. Say, I wonder what happens if I flip this gizmo here and then push the
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Top: Workers examine a B53 nuclear bomb at the B&W Pantex nuclear weapons storage facility outside Amarillo, Texas, in this handout photograph taken and released on October 25, 2011. The United States dismantled the oldest nuclear bomb in its Cold War arsenal — and one of the most powerful it ever built — on Tuesday as part of President Barack Obama’s nuclear security policy. REUTERS/Photo Courtesy B&W Pantex/Handout
Right: Production technicians conduct a training class on the B53 bomb in this handout taken October 19, 2011 and released October 20, 2011. REUTERS/National Nuclear Security Administration/Handout
Left: The shredded remains of a B53 nuclear bomb are pictured at the B&W Pantex nuclear weapons storage facility outside Amarillo, Texas, in this handout photograph taken on September 11, 2007 and released on October 25, 2011. REUTERS/Photo Courtesy B&W Pantex/Handout
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they shred nuclear bombs?!? Wow! That is a powerful shredder.
Join the OE Blog Network…the nuclear family you WANT to spend time with!
… and from here they are then turned into a Toyota Prius.
@Georgia: Isn’t that pronounced Nuke-U-Lar?
Where is Dr. StrangeBlog (or how I stopped worrying and learned to love the bomb) when we need him?
I think we are more of an extended family, than a nuclear one, Georgia..
Oh wait, you meant THAT nuclear.. oh well, sure we are!
hey, Frisco…your Texas is showing
You say nuke-u-lar
And I say nuclear
Let’s call the whole thing off
Oh my gosh! I wanna go on that training course; just so I can list it on my CV! Where do I sign up, Baz?
E.
Not so fast, egeria. First, they send you one to dismantle in your home, to make sure you have the aptitude….
Sounds as if Lamar were in charge of this training program.
@Spin: The Blog Guy’s likely to go nuclear if we start singing that song again
@jclimacus: Good point. We should go back to reforming songs from musicals.
@Spin: What a good idea, think I’ll get cracking on that
I humbly offer a haiku:
“What’s this doohickey?”
I asked my trainer, Lamar
“No! Not that!” and boom!
Looking at the name of the bomb, I guess it didn’t come from Planet Claire. That was the prior bomb.
I had no idea that the way to Amarillo was lit by nuclear bombs…
Usually, the doohickey is next to a thingamabob. Neither one will likely provide you the results you expect.
If the job is to big for a thingamajig, you can handle the job with a thingamabob. Doohickies are another topic entirely.
@CrowGirl: I’ll give it a try. Apologies to Burt Bacharach and Dionne Warwick.
Do you know the way to Amarillo?
I might’ve been passing through, but kept on going to Dalhart.
Do you know the way to Amarillo?
I need a place where I can blog and not depart.
Just ask the OE Blog fellow.
He posts a pic and we just wallow.
In an hour or so comes humor gallow.
Than after that a song might be born
And all the bloggers that never blogged
Are posting their from night to morn.
You can really blog in Amarillo
And learn a trade, something like disarming nukes
Get a hammer and a screwdriver
Orange juice and vodka not a fluke.
Fun and glory is what we find
And blogging helps pass the time.
With poetic license you can turn a phrase
Words pour out and waltz away
So there you are without a care
You hit Enter and blog away.
PanTex is a real nice factory
Disarm a B53 and you’re a star.
Make the nuke, or two, into a hybrid car.
Shredding optional, next wait for the B54.
And all those bombs still to come
Blog on, have I gone too far?
I’ve got lots of friends in Amarillo.
Do you know the way to Amarillo?
Can’t wait to get back to Amarillo.
Nah it’s not a nuclear bomb. It’s just an old crapper-tank from an RV that some skateboarders slapped a bio-hazard band sticker on.
Reminds me of Spider-Pig’s crap-filled silo Homer tried to dump into Lake Springfield…
Ahhhh, so that explains the smoke in my house Wednesday, Baz. And here I thought it was the fire next door. Tut tut, I’ll know better next time!
E.
Another contribution for the OE Musical…we really ought to save all these songs…This time, apologies to Tom Jones…
Spy on them POTUS use satellite
Infrared to see them move through the night
Aim gonna fire shoot them right
I’m gonna like the way they fight
Now you found the secret code I use
to blast away their lonely blues
So I can’t deny or lie cause they’re
the only one we will make’em fly.
Chorus:
A-bomb, H-bomb, it’s a big bomb!
You can shred it for me, when I need to make it go,
A-bomb, H-bomb, it’s a big bomb!
And baby please don’t turn it on.
No don’t get me wrong ain’t gonna do you no harm (no)
This bomb’s for lovin’ just don’t ask that Lamar though,
There’s no real target but come help tonight,
Let’s shred this A-bomb right!
Make it explode and oh you’ll know
your route to jail it won’t be slow
And yes, I must react to claims of those
who say that you are not all that.
Thank you Frisco, I knew someone would.