Oddly Enough Blog
News, but not the serious kind
Blog Guy, I’ve just started a new blog, and I could use some advice from a veteran like yourself. What do you do if you want to get a lot of traffic, but you don’t want to work very hard for it?
Yes, but just between you and me. If you wanted to pander, just once, what would you do?
I’d go for a wide audience. I’d anchor it with a really good new photo of Catherine, the Duchess of Cambridge. A close-cropped face shot, just oozing with charm.
Blog Guy, you know that Dmitry Medvedev guy who is President of Russia? He’s kind of strange looking. Can you use Photoshop or something like that to distort a picture of him and make him look even goofier?
It’s time once again for my monthly blog traffic stats, and I see that October was kind of a bittersweet time.
I’m going to do something a little different today.
His latest one, called “Cute! A Guide to All Things Adorable,” has just been published, and I enjoyed it very much. Bart offers clever insight into what makes things seem cute, and why.
Blog Guy, I guess this is a tough time for you. I mean, it’s summer and people are doing other things, so your blog traffic must have dropped.
Is there anything you can do to attract readers? You know, any little tricks?
Well, normally when it gets really bad I pay a chimpanzee to feed milk to a tiger cub. Then I get photos that are adorable beyond comprehension, and run them in my blog.
Blog Guy, what’s the latest “in” pet for celebrities to have? Are they still carrying those tiny dogs in their purses?
June was a very good month for the blog. Our traffic statistics showed that readers flocked to information they could use, along with our hard-hitting exposés of, you know, stuff.
Blog Guy, I really enjoyed your item on Medo, the world’s cutest bear, visiting your blog a few days ago.
Thanks, that one was very popular. Readers loved Medo.
Can you give us some more pix of him?
Sure, you got it. I’ll do it right now as my Sunday blog post, and then I can go back to sleep.
Blog Guy, have you ever done anything as a blogger that you’re really ashamed of?
Nothing that anybody can prove.
Okay, okay, I guess you’ve heard I hired Medo the Bear Cub to do cute stuff on my blog today. I mean, we’re heading into the summer lull and I need the traffic.