Oddly Enough Blog
News, but not the serious kind
Blog Guy, last year you wrote about a business that was putting timers in their toilets, so that the lights would turn off after 10 minutes, even if the employees weren’t finished.
I wondered if anybody else is experimenting with ways to get people to spend less time in the bathroom?
Yes, a number of researchers are looking into eliminating waste in the area of eliminating waste.
The focus is on making the bathroom experience so unpleasant that folks just want to get the hell out of there as fast as they can.
We may have hit the acme of absurdity. We should plant our flag and turn back.
Let me explain. I work at home, and I am interrupted daily by automated calls trying to fool me in some way. I don’t believe it should be legal to intrude on privacy like this, but I don’t make the laws.
Last week, I answered a robotic call and heard, “Congratulations! This household has been selected to receive an absolutely free vacation cruise! Press one for more information, or two to be taken off the list.”
Well, Lamar, I have to tell you I’m excited. It was a big decision putting you totally in charge of every aspect of our new restaurant. Millions of dollars are riding on this, but I thought you deserved your chance.
Gee, thanks, Boss. I think you’ll be very glad you did.
So, talk me through it. Looks like the opening day lunch crowd is starting to arrive at Lamar’s.
Blog Guy, your career advice is very useful, especially your tips on possible indicators that we may have taken the wrong career path at some point. Thanks to your last one, my brother got out of the bee-wearing profession.
Okay staff, we all know we’ve got a problem. The president isn’t as popular as he used to be. His numbers are down, and the Republicans are slinging mud. Anybody got an idea?
Hmmmm. Not bad, Lamar, but he’s done that twice already. I think he needs something different this time.
Hello, thank you for calling Lamar’s Fix-It and Fried Okra Shop. How may I direct your call?
What do you mean direct my call? You have different departments?
No, just the fried okra and repair thing. You know our motto, “If it ain’t broke, we’ll pretend to fix it anyway.”
Blog Guy, is it just me, or am I seeing lots of photos of Abraham Lincoln in the news these days?
Yes, I’ve noticed it, too. Most recently with presidential candidate Michele Bachmann greeting a Lincoln lookalike at a Republican dinner in Iowa a couple of days ago.