Oddly Enough Blog

News, but not the serious kind

Will you be taking those grenades all the way to Belgium?

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Sometimes I just don’t understand stuff, so maybe you can help me with this exercise in logic.

The security folks at Newark’s airport were X-raying checked baggage a few days ago when they found five hand grenades in a woman’s luggage. Yes, five.

According to our story, the grenades had been disarmed, and the woman surrendered them “without incident.”

She was then allowed to board the flight, bound for Belgium.

Excuse me? These are among the questions I have about this…

    Isn’t carrying more than two hand grenades already by definition an incident? If the grenades didn’t pose a threat, why did she have to surrender them? Would you want to sit next to somebody who tried packing five grenades in her suitcase? Why would a person go to Belgium?

Another story about the same incident said the Transportation Security Administration “could not say what the woman had intended to do with the grenades once she reached Europe.”

Do we get a snack on this flight, or what?

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Quick quiz: You realize your job may sort of suck if you…

a) find yourself on a flight from Malta to Tripoli

b) notice the card by your seat describes you only as the “Senior Leader-in-Transit”

c) are trying to read your PDA with your sunglasses on

d) are trying to study a briefing book and can’t recall if your eyes are open or shut

Our ten-second in-flight movie will be…

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Blog Guy, recently you wrote about a bunch of ambitious homemade inventions around the world. A submarine, a helicopter, stuff like that. Do those things actually work?

You bet they do. Here is that farmer in China testing his homemade flying device yesterday. It’s powered by eight motorcycle engines.

Great science projects for your family…

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Blog Guy, my daughter, Julie, has to do a school project involving transportation. We were thinking about making a little cardboard sled.

A cardboard sled? Are you a chump? Don’t you care about getting little Julie into a decent college?

You’ve been upgraded to Gaddafi Class!

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Blog Guy, I saw some photos of fugitive strongman Muammar Gaddafi’s private plane, taken at an airport in Tripoli. I’m surprised you didn’t blog about it.

Look, there’s something of a conflict of interest here. As you may have noticed, the plane was a Basler BT-70, built by “my company” for Gaddafi.

Cashing in on My Good Name?

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Blog Guy, I know you’re busy designing the next generation Basler BT-70 aircraft, but I may want to buy a plane before you have a chance to test your new model.

Test it? What do you mean by that?

Never mind. Anyway, the current Basler BT-67 seems very cool and just what I need, but I saw the list of options and I have a few questions.

Hardware store? Send more wingnuts!

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Blog Guy, I need some of your famous career advice. I recently graduated from college, and Mom gave me a brochure called “The Exciting World of Wing Walking.” I was wondering if I should pursue this?

I guess everybody goes through that phase, including me… We all want to be like Ormer Locklear, the first great daredevil wing walker. THERE was a barnstormer!

Folks, we may be in for a Trumpy landing

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Blog Guy, we know you were pretty upset about Donald Trump not running for president, clearly a huge loss of humor potential for your blog. Are you getting over it?

I don’t have to. My staff researcher found a loophole on page 466 of the book “The Bloggers’ Code.”

Okay, what moron closed the sun roof?

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Say, Blog Guy, I saw some photos of a solar-powered prototype aircraft being tested. That’s a pretty cool concept. Have you thought about making a solar version of that Basler BT-70 airplane of yours?

Yes, we tried that last year. It gets pretty hot in those solar things, what with going out of your way to absorb sunlight.

“We almost always land”

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Blog Guy, you haven’t written much recently about your secret career with Basler Turbo, that business in Wisconsin that converts DC-3 planes to be used for specific jobs.

Well, it so happens that right now I am very busy designinbasler airlines patch 340g a successor to the incredible Basler BT-67 airplane.