Oddly Enough Blog

News, but not the serious kind

Herb! Watch out for his… Oh, never mind!

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Quick quiz: Looking through the Weekend Entertainment section of your local newspaper, which of these festivals could be fun?

a) The Apple Picking Festival

b) The Cherry Blossom Festival

c) The Cute Puppy and Kitten Adoption Festival

d) The Fire-Snorting Wild Bull-Taming Festival

Yeah, I’d have to say all of them could be neat except for that last one.

Just for starters, it doesn’t look like the bulls fully understand that their purpose here is to be tamed.

In fact, it looks to me like they chose the Send Humans to the Hospital Festival, from their Weekend Entertainment section. Which, if you’re a bull, could probably be lots of fun!

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Villagers try to control a bull during a bull-taming festival on the outskirts of Madurai town, India, January 15, 2009. REUTERS/Babu

Snarley and Me…

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Dear Auntie Charlene,

I hope your Christmas was as nice as ours. Thank you SO much for the thick padded pajamas, which will really help keep me warm through these cold Miami nights.

And thanks, too, for the dog you sent for the kids. Imagine our surprise when we opened that big crate!

Just which species made these feces?

If you’re like me, nothing makes you think of the Holy Land like donkey poop.

I mean, the donkeys are right there in the Nativity story, and where there are donkeys, there is, you know, leftover evidence of donkeys.

That deer’s around here… Ahhhhhh!!!!!!!!!

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It’s the time of year for lists, as we saw yesterday with my own top ten posts. One of the best lists I’ve seen is from PETA, the animal rights group, offering the Top Ten Most Karmic Moments for Animal Abusers in 2008. And what a list it is!

* A hunter tracking a deer he shot falls off a cliff.

* A woman using a .44 magnum to shoot MICE shoots herself and a bystander.

* A guy striking his dog with a gun manages to shoot himself.

This is the feel-good list of this holiday season, and I’m dedicating this post to my own rescue dogs and cats.

Look, Precious! A special on string!

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Blog Guy, you wrote recently that they’re starting to use cats for security jobs. Are other new uses being found for cats?

Yes indeed. Many people have started using their cats to do their grocery shopping.

Trust me, you don’t wanna see this…

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Blog Guy, I envy you for getting to spend  your time looking through nice photographs. What a pleasant life.

HAH! You only think that because you don’t see the pictures I’m protecting my readers from. Here’s a sampling of photos I’ve had to look at in recent days.

Mommy, that panda has an arm in its mouth!

Gentlemen, this is the worst crisis the Panda Propaganda Council has ever faced!

We need full damage-control! News has got out that a guy sneaked into the panda pen at a zoo, just for a cuddle, and the panda ATTACKED him!

Of course Pandas are vile beasts that drink bourbon and smoke cigars, but we cover it up so we can rake in $60 billion a year from panda cuteness.

Repent, for the end is near!

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Hey, Blog Guy! You used to warn us about signs of the coming apocalypse, but you haven’t mentioned that recently. Does that mean everything is getting better?

Far from it! In perhaps the most crystal clear sign yet that the end is near, we have photos today of pigs being tattooed in the name of art.

Grab the kids, we’re takin’ a stupid trip!

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This blog’s travel section has kind of a cute twist. It caters to folks who want a good reason to stay home. That job just got lots easier, what with a new attraction in Australia.

Crocosaurus Cove, which is Australian for “Toss another tourist on the barbie,” allows you to be in a clear underwater container, face-to-face with a massive saltwater crocodile.

Awwww, who’s a GOOD hyena!

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The actual caption for this photo tells us this dude is “posing” with a hyena. Now, in the city where I live, hyena-posing hasn’t really caught on yet, so I decided to look into this a bit more.

It turns out it’s not all that unusual to see street entertainers in Nigeria with “trained” hyenas. They travel to the places where they work in public taxis. I am not making that up.