Oddly Enough Blog

News, but not the serious kind

More jumbo gumbo, Mr. President?

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Blog Guy, have you seen that amazing new book about former first lady Jacqueline Kennedy, the one taken from hours of taped interviews with her just months after her husband was assassinated?

I have, indeed. It’s a must-read for anyone who likes fish soup.

Excuse me? Are we talking about the same book?

Sure. I’m not even finished with it, and already I’m struck by her vivid chowder memories of Jack Kennedy:

“He’d come home, and then it would be fish chowder….”

“I remember we had fish chowder. You could still sit outside.”

“I mean, you had what he loves – his fish chowder – and he was still picking Cornelius Ryan’s brains about ‘The Longest Day.’”

“And Jack was sitting in the black sweater, the hair – the wind blowing his hair, blissfully happy with fish chowder.”

Let’s do something spontaneous, Baby!

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Hey Blog Guy, how come you’re sitting in that huge tub of ice cubes up to your neck?

That’s my new “home.” I eat, sleep and blog here, under constant monitoring.

You want fries with that museum?

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Honey, I have a surprise!
An entire museum of fries!
Let’s order a malted,
And everything salted,
Then leave, before anyone dies!

Blog Guy, I read your item about the Ramen Museum in Japan, which sounds kind of boring. Are there any really great food-themed museums?

I think they all come from Cooperstown

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Blog Guy, can you please settle a bet with my handyman’s numismatist?

Oh please! More random bets between unlikely random professions? What does this coin collector say?

Well, I saw that CNN journalist Anderson Cooper speaking in Orlando on Tuesday evening, but my handyman’s numismatist claims he saw Cooper on the same evening, speaking in Boise. Which one of us is right?

Get out your dimes, it’s midnight!

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Blog Guy, if my calendar is correct, you’ve got a major event coming up?

Yes, the celebrated Goofy Face Museum and Doughnut Shop, here in Washington DC, is ready to launch our big new season the day after Labor Day.

I just don’t understand that. I always thought the big tourist season is in the summer.

That’s why they call it Killing time…

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What’s up, Blog Guy? You look annoyed.

Yeah, I hate being suckered. I see the programming chief for AMC now says the murder that was the central crime in his network’s Emmy-nominated series, “The Killing,” will be wrapped up in the SECOND season.

Wait. Didn’t that show just finish its first season? You mean they didn’t solve the crime?

The importance of…Have I used this headline before?

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It’s summer, Blog Guy, and that means lots of funny local competitions. I hope you’re monitoring those for your readers.

I’m all over it. Looks like they just had some kind of “Plump Old Coot” contest in Key West, Florida, open to guys with big guts, white beards and Boy Scout uniforms. I have a photo of six of them.

Rewriting Jane, an Austen-tatious move

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Blog Guy, I read that a handwritten draft of a Jane Austen book that was never published just sold for $1.6 million at auction. The story said it was an unfinished work. She’s my very favorite author!

Yeah, I know all about that. I was the anonymous telephone bidder who bought the draft. I’m eating barbecue ribs and reading her manuscript right now. It’s not bad.

Reading in bed just got a lot better…

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Okay Lamar, your memo said you’ve come up with a  totally new fashion concept in women’s apparel. I’m very excited, so show me what you’ve got.

Okay, Boss!  Presenting, ta-da, The Linger-Read!

The what?

It’s lingerie that you can read, Boss. So if you get bored with your partner, you can at least read what she’s wearing for entertainment.

You betcha those British are comin’!

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Blog Guy, I’m surprised you didn’t get involved in the Sarah Palin thing a couple of days ago, when she told her goofy version of Paul Revere’s ride.

Yeah, I do have to admit that was the best video clip I’ve seen since Miss South Carolina immortalized herself a few years ago.