Oddly Enough Blog

News, but not the serious kind

What’s up with the pink socks, Hoss?

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Blog Guy, I saw a Reuters photo from Spain showing four guys together in silly outfits. What’s the story?

I think it’s a shot from a Spanish remake of “Bonanza.” From left, that’s Hoss, Ben, Adam and…

You’re a total moron, Blog Guy. You can’t bother to read your own captions? These are bullfighters. The gray outfit is an Armani.

It says this particular annual event involves costumes from “the era of Goya,” whatever that is.

You’ve reached the firm of Ponce, Bonache and Gotcha!

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Blog Guy, do you stand behind the info in your photo captions? Is there a chance anybody ever pulls a fast one on you?

We do our best to check information, but my own personal suspicion is that sometimes people in Spain are having a laugh at my expense.

I hope there are some bulls on his “death panel”

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Blog Guy, what’s the humane situation in Britain? They really love their animals, right? But so like what if you’re a Brit person and you really have this urge to be cruel to animals? Is that a problem?

You can go fox hunting, though that’s a little more difficult these days.

Do these pants make my butt look big?

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Blog Guy, I’m back with more questions about the honorable sport of bullfighting.

Sure, but let me remind you, bullfighting isn’t a sport, it’s a “sport.” Big difference.

Gored of the rings?

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Blog Guy, thanks for keeping that information flowing about the proud tradition of bullfighting, even though I don’t think you like it very much.

I thought I was hiding my feelings pretty well.

So does the bullfighter interact with the crowd at all during the event?

You bet. Here you can see what is called El Winkador. It’s the matador’s way of saying, “I’m midway through torturing a poor animal to death, wink wink. Aren’t I cute?”

Spain’s school for waiters! Flan with élan?

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Okay gentlemen, listen up. You’re all here because you were accepted at Fancypants University! Good old FU, the best school for waiters in all of Spain.

You look muy bueno in your festive outfits, with your tablecloths folded over your arms.

Trot a little faster, Dad!

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Blog Guy, thanks for continuing to explain the majestic traditions of bullfighting. What’s the last thing that happens before the bullfighter enters the ring?

As you can see, “El Snapadoro” takes an official photo in case there’s a hole the size of a toilet seat going through him after the fight. Smile, Mr. Personality!

Tora! Tora! Tora! Toro? Toro? Toro?

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Blog guy, you’ve had a lot of photos lately of Spanish bullfighters getting tossed around and trampled. So like, is there any chance they’ll run out of them soon?

That would be nice, but I’m afraid not. See, they’re importing them from Asia now.

Still in the bull business, huh?

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Blog Guy, what is Rod Blagojevich, that former Illinois governor, doing since he left office in disgrace?

Good question. That has been a real mystery, until very recently. It appears he took one of those two-week online matador courses, bought a silly outfit, and is now working as a bullfighter in Spain. I spotted him in a photo from Pamplona.

Goring, goring, gone…

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Blog Guy, I heard it was another rough day for the revelers at the running of the bulls.

You bet. Despite the fact that a bunch of runners had already been injured at the Animal Cruelty Festival in Pamplona, one of them fatally, they were off and running again yesterday, with other serious injuries.