Welcome back to the always popular feature, Stuff Maybe we Should Have Explained in the Caption, but Didn’t.

The actual, real, true caption for this photo tells us only that it shows Brazil’s president wearing a “bee protection outfit.” My head buzzes with questions.

• Has Brazil come under attack from swarms of killer bees?
• Does that nation’s leader have an irrational phobia?
• Has he been summoned to a meeting with The Queen Bee?
• Who is that dude laughing in the face of painful stinging death?

And by the way, if bees are such a fricking threat, should the president really be waving his bare hand like that?

Sadly, our caption offers no clue. But I’ll tell you one thing. If we posted a shot of Barack Obama in a “bee protection outfit,” I’ll bet the caption would offer some hint as to why.

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Brazil’s President Luiz Inacio Lula da Silva wears a bee protection outfit in the northeastern Brazilian city of Salvador March 24, 2009. REUTERS/ Ricardo Stuckert/PR/Handout

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I’m back with another episode of Stuff Maybe We Should Have Explained in the Caption, but Didn’t.

This time, it’s a photo of Pope Benedict XV with a lion tamer and a lion cub. The actual caption doesn’t say why.

I mean, we know there has been bad blood between Christians and lions. Is this some kind of a rapprochement?

Or did the pope mention to an inept aide that he is a “Cubs fan,” and this was the result?

I am happy to report the caption makes clear that the pope is the guy on the right, so as not to confuse readers who might mistake him for the young dude with sideburns and a circus costume.

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Pope Benedict XVI (R) looks at a lion cub held by a lion tamer of Circus Medrano during his Wednesday general audience in Paul VI hall at the Vatican January 28, 2009. REUTERS/Tony Gentile

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Welcome back to our popular feature, Stuff maybe we should have explained in the caption, but didn’t. We’re told these photos show demonstrators in Edwardian costumes protesting the expansion of London’s Heathrow Airport.

Huh? And that would be because airport expansion was a vital issue during the 1901 to 1910 Edwardian era? Or because protesting without a fun period costume just isn’t done?

“Don’t you look foolish, Molly, wearing a Victorian dress at the Edwardian protest! Try to keep up, girlfriend!”

“Sorry, I lost my costume protest calendar last week, at the 17th century fop demonstration!”

“No! That means you haven’t started working on a character from Hogarth’s iconic work, Gin Lane!“

“I can’t do that one, anyway. It will take me three days to get made up as a Bubonic Plague victim for the march next week!”

“You know, we should have a protest over having to make all these costumes!”

“Great idea! Let’s come as our favorite wife of Henry VIII!“

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Demonstrators dressed in Edwardian costume protest against the expansion of Heathrow Airport by picnicking inside the airport’s Terminal 1, in London January 12, 2009. REUTERS/Stephen Hird

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It’s time again for our popular feature called Stuff Maybe We Should Have Explained in the Caption, but Didn’t. We’re told that this designated Swiss defense minister is in his hometown, being congratulated by chimney sweepers.

What? Cripes, I live in a whole neighborhood of Victorian homes festooned with fireplaces, and I’ve never seen this many chimney sweepers together at one time.

What did this guy do, go to a chimney sweeper bar? If you’re a bar owner, would you opt for an after-work crowd of guys with soot from head to toe, leaving their ashy imprints on the pretzel bowl and everything?

“Gents! It’s great to be home again! I’d have come sooner, but I had the flue! Get it?

“Bartender, make me a Burning Santa, and turn on the TV! It’s SWEEPS week!

“Yeah, I got a million chimney jokes! Stick around, boys!’

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Chimney sweepers congratulate designated Swiss Defense Minister Ueli Maurer during a visit to his hometown Hinwil, east of Zurich, December 18, 2008. REUTERS/ Arnd Wiegmann

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It isn’t often that this blog gets to solve a genuine mystery of science, but today’s my big day!

We have all these photos of a some dinosaur footprints discovered in Bolivia, see. Scientists are all like “Wow!” As if they’re stunned to learn that dinosaurs roamed their country.

Well, wake up and smell Godzilla, dudes! When I saw these new footprints I recalled a blog post I did from Bolivia last year, which explains it all! The photo below was taken just 96 miles from the footprints!

Somebody please tell the Nobel Prize committee they can reach me through my blog. It’s an honor just to be nominated…

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Above: A Bolivian farmer stands in an area where he made a new discovery of dinosaur footprints near Icla, 96 miles southeast of Sucre, November 16, 2008.

Below Bolivian indigenous people take a break from a meeting in Sucre September 10, 2007.

REUTERS photos by David Mercado

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Welcome back to our popular feature, “Things Maybe we Should have Explained in a Caption, but Didn’t.” The actual caption here tells us this soldier is “wearing a wig” as he smokes near the front lines.

Excuse me? “Ernie, we’re gonna see combat today. Is my wig on straight?” That just doesn’t sound right.

I checked, and it turns out the dude said he was wearing the wig to scare the enemy and give him magic powers.

Now, I have to think that if that big honking rocket propelled grenade on his back doesn’t scare the enemy, a wig isn’t going to do the trick.

But I could be wrong. Maybe this is a whole nation of folks who are petrified of wigs, just ripe for a surprise attack by Dolly Parton.

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A Congolese government soldier wearing a wig smokes by the roadside near the front line, north of Goma in eastern Congo, November 11, 2008. REUTERS/Finbarr O’Reilly

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Hello, and welcome back to a popular feature we like to call, “Things Maybe we should have Explained in the Caption, but Didn’t.”

The photo caption below says these guys are assistants, “preparing for a bullfight.”

It looks to me like they’re just guys in dumb hats chewing on fancy capes.

Oh, excuse me. I’ve just been informed they are positioning the capes so that if their boss gets the grande fling from the bull, they can disappear and not have to go in after him.

They instantly turn into two cape-covered dudes getting the hell out of Dodge without looking back. That makes perfect sense to me! Why didn’t we just say that in the first place?

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Mexico’s Lulu De La Vega is tackled by bull during bullfight in Lima, November 1, 2008.

Assistants prepare for bullfight in Lima, November 1, 2008.

REUTERS photos by Pilar Olivares

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Here’s another of those dire photo caption warnings. We’ve seen them before. You will note below the caption says you may NOT use this handout photo for advertising!

I know, that’s very bad news for you ad agencies planning campaigns for army surplus fatigues or red berets for the Christmas market.  And while this picture would seem perfect thanks to those banners, do NOT try using it for a glossy socialism ad!

Lastly - are you listening, Hasbro?  - if you’re marketing GI Joe Hugo Chavez action figures for boys, you’ll have to look elsewhere for a photo to use on the box. I don’t make the rules, I just enforce them.

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Venezuela’s President Hugo Chavez arrives to attend a military exercise in El Guri, in the southern state of Bolivar, September 13, 2008. REUTERS/ Ho-Miraflores Palace. FOR EDITORIAL USE ONLY. NOT FOR SALE FOR MARKETING OR ADVERTISING CAMPAIGNS.

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For the second time in a week, I’m presenting Things Maybe We Should Have Explained in a Caption, but Didn’t.

I have no choice, what with finding photos of a stage drama in which the caption tells us an actor is “dressed in meat.” Say what?

Don’t worry, I’m not going to stoop to awful word-play, like meaty role, a rare performance, the play was well done, he butchered the part… I do have some dignity, you know.

But I will say two things here. First, I suggest you see this play as close to opening night as possible, because those costumes won’t improve with age, if you take my meaning. And second, if my dogs ever get tickets to this play, it will not be a pretty sight.

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Actor Mislav Cavajda, dressed in meat, performs in the drama the “Bakhe” during Split summer festivities in Croatia, July 19, 2008. REUTERS/Stringer

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It’s time again for Things Maybe We Should Have Explained in a Caption, but Didn’t. Today, we see a photo of a lawyer holding a news conference in Yemen, except wait! He’s taking off his clothes!

Our caption does recognize that he is removing his trousers. It says he is explaining  inmate mistreatment, but it doesn’t say if these two facts are connected. For all I know, “news conference” is just a euphemism for stripping in Yemen.

It could be like, “We’re goin’ to Joey’s bachelor party tonight. I hope they have some chicks to put on a news conference for us!” Or “Mr.  Jones, the doctor will be in to see you soon. Please news conference yourself and wait on that examining table.”

This needs to be sorted out before some U.S. presidential candidate agrees to hold a “news conference” in Yemen.

U.S. lawyer David Remes, who represents 16 Yemeni prisoners held at the Guantanamo Bay military base in Cuba, takes his trousers off during a news conference in Sanaa, Yemen, July 14, 2008. Remes, who was explaining to journalists the mistreatment that the inmates say they are subjected to, called on the Yemeni government to push for the release of around 100 Yemeni citizens from Guantanamo Bay. REUTERS/Khaled Abdullah

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