Oddly Enough Blog
News, but not the serious kind
Which job would you choose?
Blog Guy, I need some of your famous career advice. I have a dead-end job selling lunch meat door-to-door, and I’m looking for something different.
Hmmmm. Are you willing to relocate overseas? Do you enjoy working outdoors and getting a little exercise on the job?
You betcha! I’m not really a morning person. Evening work suits me best.
Then I may have your dream job. You should consider being one of the 44 people employed to kill rats at night in Mumbai, like these guys in the pictures.
OMG I think I’m going to barf! How do they kill them?
The caption says they use an “improvised stick,” whatever that is. Personally, if I had to show up night after night to beat rats to death, I think I’d bring a real stick, but maybe that’s just me.
Hire me! I can be a better vetter!
Hey Blog Guy, I don’t get out very much. Can you explain what these guys in this picture are doing?
Yes, the caption says they’re vetting dancers before the opening of an Erotica show.
Excuse me? They’re doing what?
You know, they’re watching exotic dancers, to make sure the audience won’t go blind or spontaneously combust or anything like that.
That’s an actual JOB?
Sure, but Exotic Dance Vetting is tougher than it looks, because the minute the vetter seems to be enjoying it, he’s fired.
So these are the dudes responsible for all the salmon bars, huh? Shame on them.
Lemme just hack away at this gizmo…
Blog Guy, I’m looking for a new career and I know your advice is the best. I picked up a colorful brochure called, “The Exciting World of Battlefield Rocket Repair,” and I was wondering if you think that’s a good way to go?
That brochure is really making the rounds, isn’t it? I hear from lots of young people, captivated by the opening lines, “Hey, have you always wanted to see Libya?”
So, what do you think? Would I need to learn to use a lot of complicated tools?
Not really. You can see this guy in the photo working on a sophisticated Grad rocket, and he’s just using a knife.
Yikes! Using a knife on a Grad rocket? That seems pretty dangerous!
Hey, there are worse jobs than his.
uncarastus, agreed. ifly FTW.
Did anyone notice that the two gentlemen in the background of Pic 1 must have switched hats?
Signs that you made a dumb career move
Blog Guy, your career advice is very useful, especially your tips on possible indicators that we may have taken the wrong career path at some point. Thanks to your last one, my brother got out of the bee-wearing profession.
Thanks. Here’s a tip that a surprising number of young urban professionals tend to overlook, what with their busy schedules.
If you find yourself flat on your stomach and you can’t get up, look over your shoulder. If there is a 3,000 pound bull on your back, then maybe you actually should have READ the questions on your Career Aptitude Test before answering them.
Uh-oh, that one hits pretty close to home, Blog Guy. I myself was lured by a pamphlet called, “The Exciting Life of the Matador,” and once I saw the sissy outfits and stupid hats, I was hooked.
Yes, know, I hear that from people all the time.
So if I see the 3,000 pound bull on my back, what else should I watch for?
“So if I see the 3,000 pound bull on my back, what else should I watch for?”
The wall. Don’t get between the bull and the wall, that hurts a LOT.
Earn big bucks without knowing anything!
I swear, I don’t know why I keep getting suckered by these lame “list” stories. For instance, Ten Jobs that Don’t Require a Degree.
Please, let me save you the trouble of reading it. Basically, these are 10 jobs that may not require a college degree, but to get them you have to take really crappy entry-level jobs and work your way up, if you live long enough.
Still interested? I will hit the highlights. It says here you can be the captain of a commercial ship, enjoying “long hours of isolation or dangerous conditions.” After sugar-coating the job like that, the story says you don’t get to be a captain right away. No, you have to start as a deckhand.
I’m sure being a professional deckhand is a real chick-magnet, but I’m not settling for the first job on the list.
Let’s see. I can be a manager in the highly respected gaming industry. But it turns out there are only 6,900 jobs in the whole country, and you have to begin as a dealer, “one of the worst-paying jobs in the country.”
Not interested in helping people lose their life savings at blackjack? No problem. Next on the list is police detective, a job they describe as having “one of the highest rates of on-the-job injury and illness.” Cool!
Damn, Crow, you’re way too clever! You’ve already figured out the competition is never won by somebody who shows up….
Hardware store? Send more wingnuts!
Blog Guy, I need some of your famous career advice. I recently graduated from college, and Mom gave me a brochure called “The Exciting World of Wing Walking.” I was wondering if I should pursue this?
I guess everybody goes through that phase, including me… We all want to be like Ormer Locklear, the first great daredevil wing walker. THERE was a barnstormer!
Whatever happened to Ormer?
He died in a plane crash while shooting a 1920 movie, “The Skywayman.” They went ahead and used the crash scene in the movie.
I certainly had no idea that you yourself were once a wing walker!
Well, I fell more into the category of wing barfer, but it’s the same general idea. There’s still that adrenaline rush that comes with clutching the top wing with your fingernails while watching your lunch cascade below.
and I thought this was a blog about hardware! haha!
well done.
Seattle Wingnuts
Oh honey, I’m home!
Blog Guy, you used to offer useful tips on how people can tell if they’ve made a bad career choice. Can you please do some more of those?
Sure. Here’s one career test that many young professionals overlook until it is too late.
Look at yourself in a full-length mirror. If all you can see are bees crawling over every inch of your face and body, you may have chosen poorly on career day.
I was afraid of that, Blog Guy. That’s exactly what I see. But at least I am wearing swimming goggles and I have some sort of cigarette filters jammed in my nose.
I’m afraid that doesn’t change the fact that you wear bees for a living.
But the job sounded so glamorous! How was I to know?
Can one say attagirl?We can fix up this grenade, good as new!
Blog Guy, I’m a recent college graduate who needs career advice. I picked up a colorful brochure entitled “The Exciting Field of Refurbishing Rocket-Propelled Grenades,” and I wondered if I should look into that.
A lot of grads are asking me that these days. It looks like RPG Refurbishment is attracting entry-level folks at a rapid pace.
Kids, I know the brochures make it seem really glamorous, but I just can’t recommend this career path.
Sure, the black rubber gloves look cool, but you have to ask yourself why this man’s boss has located his office behind 450 massive truck tires.
You see, RPGs are designed to be used once. Any effort to repair them and reload them with what we call “high explosives” invalidates the warranty.
But Blog Guy, in the brochure the man gets to work sitting down, which is important to me!
@CG – I’m with you there. Rocket in one holder, HE and fuse in the other. Lamar was earning his pay taking these pictures.
Where do I sign up?
Hit Man Camp? Pass the lime bag, slimebag!
Blog Guy, what are some things to watch for if you suspect you’ve chosen the wrong summer camp?
Good question. This would be one example. The photo caption here says these things are latrines at a “drug hit men training camp.”
So are they all booked up for June, Blog Guy?
You’re not paying attention.
I’m saying if your camp’s restroom consists of a log-covered pit and a communal lime bag, and you’re hurrying off to handicrafts like Make Your Own Silencer, you may not be a happy camper.
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Merlot on the go?
Blog Guy, like many of your readers I’m looking for a new and interesting career. I like to drive, I like retail work, and I enjoy making people happy. Any ideas?
I may have just the thing. How would you like to drive a van around and stop to sell wine to people?
That could be fun. Folks must be happy to see the Wine Mobile arrive, right?
Exactly! Sort of the Good Humor man for grown-ups!
Where would I drive this Wine Mobile?
You know, the usual places. Indianapolis, Kokomo, Evansville, Chernobyl…
There was a time when I wouldnt try wine..
not even with friends, when we sat to dine..
Then one fine days, someone poured me a Proseco..
and I sipped, the taste pleasing me mucho!
So, I think, when we board the wine-a-bago…
we definitely have to carry this precious cargo..
and bring it to the nearly inhabited village
near Chernobyl, so they dont feel the embargo…
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Resident Oddly Enough blog Expert
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@Moonshine, ok then. I am not familiar with White Plains so I will take your word for that. I will believe though that it is more pleasant than the city.