Oddly Enough Blog

News, but not the serious kind

The best of July, a definite pattern?

Photo
-

Well, it’s time to look at the blog traffic statistics for July, and never has there been a clearer pattern.

Of the 10 most-read items, SEVEN were about the Duchess of Cambridge and her six-month visit to every city, town and hamlet in Canada.

Okay, I get the message. My readers want all the news they can get about Canada.

Another TWO of the top 10 were about a gigantic marijuana plantation, so I guess readers are interested in agriculture, as well.

The hot new pet for the rich and famous?

Photo
-

Blog Guy, what’s the latest “in” pet for celebrities to have? Are they still carrying those tiny dogs in their purses?

No, small dogs are SO over! These days, the rich and famous go everywhere with their pet lobsters, as you can see here with the Duchess of Cambridge, Sarah Palin, Martha Stewart…

Staying longer with a monger?

Photo
-

Blog Guy, it seemed to me that Britain’s Prince William and Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge, really had to do some silly stuff on their long trip to Canada.

I mean, cowboy hats, a stagecoach, canoes, stuff like that.

Don’t worry about William and Catherine. At least they managed to avoid visiting fishmongers, which is the worst royal duty there is.

Duchess? It has a certain ring to it…

Photo
-

 

Blog Guy, thanks for all your coverage of the royal visit by Britain’s Prince William and Catherine, the Duchess of Cambridge. I guess it served its purpose, to raise their profile, huh?

Oh grow up. You think this visit was about them? The Brits have the single most famous piece of jewelry on earth, Catherine’s 18-carat sapphire and diamond ring, and they want to make sure it keeps circulating.

The stage is comin’ with a duchess on it!

Photo
-

Crap, Willy, what now? What is this thing taking us into town?

It’s a stagecoach, Duchess! Great, huh?  Conestoga wagon, prairie schooner, buckboard…

Shut up. They don’t have big limousines in Calgary?

Not so much, I guess.

Sigh. What’s on our schedule for day number 840 in Canada?

Uh, let’s see. Hey, it looks like we’re taking part in some kind of a Village People retrospective…

I can fix this one up real good, Duchess!

Photo
-

Blog Guy, I know you have close ties to Britain’s royal family, so maybe you can answer a question. Why are Prince William and Catherine, the Duchess of Cambridge, spending so much time in Canada?

I’m really not supposed to say.

Look, we’ve been through this before. If you put it in your blog, nobody will even see it.

How much can one duchess take?

Photo
-

Blog Guy, you wrote about Prince William and Catherine, the Duchess of Cambridge, watching a bagpiper a few days ago during their visit to Canada.

From what I’ve seen, they are being subjected to a lot of that.

Very true, and nobody has studied the effects of prolonged bagpipe exposure on normal people. In this photo above, taken yesterday, it appears Catherine is starting to crack.

William, what year is it here?

Photo
-

Blog Guy, I’ve been reading your stories about Britain’s Prince William and Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge, and their visit to Canada. With her incredible fashion sense, I’m guessing she must really be dazzling those Canadians.

Well, they don’t quite know what to make of her modern outfits, since your typical Canadian still dresses kind of turn-of-the-century.

Cooking with Catherine: The Barefoot Duchess?

Photo
-

Blog Guy, thanks for finally giving us some coverage of William and Catherine’s royal tour of Canada. We want more!

Well, Catherine did a cooking workshop at the Institut de tourisme et d’hotellerie du Quebec, in Montreal.

We’ve got fresh Kate, direct from Canada!

Photo
-

Blog Guy, I have a complaint. Kate Middleton has been in Canada for several days now and you’ve written nothing about it, even though some of your readers are seriously addicted to her.

Look, I no longer actually cover stories, but I’m a professional, so I can wing it by looking at our photo file. Here you go.