Oddly Enough Blog

News, but not the serious kind

On the phona in Pamplona?

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Blog Guy, I was very interested in your report yesterday on the San Fermin festival, in Spain. May I ask a question about it?

Sure. I know quite a bit about the festival.

Well, I was wondering what it looks like if someone uses a phone at the festival.

Good question! I think it would look something like this photo here.

Very interesting. One more thing. If the woman in that photo was a long-lost love child of actor Dick Van Dyke, calling to say “Daddy, it’s your daughter, I’m running with the bulls at Pamplona!” What would his reaction look like?

It would probably resemble the picture below.

Thanks, Blog Guy. Your resources are simply amazing! I didn’t think you’d be able to pull that one off.

Really something to smile about!

Quick quiz: The people in these photos are smiling because they got tickets to…

a) A $40 million lottery

b) A dinner with President Barack Obama

c) A private audience with the pope

d) A memorial service

Yeah, surprisingly, it’s the memorial service thing.

I guess this finally explains that old expression, “as happy as a guy going to a memorial service.”

All I have to do is show up?

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Blog Guy, how can I get Reuters to take my picture? I imagine I’d have to do something VERY newsworthy.

Not really. All you have to do is put on silly outfits and go from city to city like that butthead British actor whose name I’m not going to mention. We’ll take your picture everywhere you go and put out 46 pictures in two weeks, and it probably isn’t over yet.

Two MILES to the nearest bathroom?

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Blog Guy, I’m planning a vacation in New York City. I know you’re a cosmopolitan traveler who used to live in the Big Apple. Any inside advice?

Use the bathroom before you arrive. There are never enough to go around when you’re doing tourist stuff.

Really? That’s it?

Don’t laugh. Looking through our photo file from yesterday I see that singer Mariah Carey seems to have run into this problem.

Father’s Day salute to Bad Dad!

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Happy Father’s Day, Blog Guy! What’s the thing that makes you think most about fathers and sons on this special day? Baseball? Fishing?

Television. Especially classic TV, when Dad came home from the office in a suit and kept it on until bedtime, and maybe didn’t even take it off then. To me, nothing says father like a scripted dad getting paid to love his pretend kids.

Come back out, Susan, we’re not done yet!

Blog Guy, you haven’t written anything about that singer, Susan Boyle. After she didn’t win “Britain’s Got Talent” she was admitted to a London clinic, and I want to know what’s going on there.

Why?

When something touching and beautiful happens to someone, I want to make sure it doesn’t last long, and that they pay for it by being hounded to the gates of eternal hell until the day they die.

You had garlic bread for breakfast, didn’t you?

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Quick quiz: Well-to-do socialite Paris Hilton and this guy here are…

    Discussing if they can get to the bar in time for Wednesday night $1 margaritas. Singing that Captain and Tenille hit, “Muskrat Love.” Shooting a mouthwash ad that will only be seen in Japan. Flirting shamelessly; She’s saying, “I’ve done hard time, big boy, that changes a girl!” and he’s saying, “You’re a socialite? So you think the government should own everything?”

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Socialite Paris Hilton and her friend Doug Reinhardt kiss as they arrive on the red carpet for the screening of the film “Inglourious Basterds” by director Quentin Tarantino at the 62nd Cannes Film Festival May 20, 2009. REUTERS/Eric Gaillard

What did you do at camp, Bobby?

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How does it feel, How does it feel,
To be on your own, with someone else’s poem?

I love this one. We did a story yesterday about Christie’s plans to auction a hand-written poem by a teenaged Bob Dylan. Christie’s said the poem was believed written in 1957 when Dylan, then still using the name Bobby Zimmerman, was at a summer camp in Wisconsin.

Here comes Jerry’s tongue again!

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Blog Guy, I heard there was some kind of financial disaster involving your Goofy Face Museum and Doughnut Shop.

It’s horrible. We spent a huge portion of our 2009 acquisition budget for the photo on the right of comedian Jerry Lewis mugging in Cannes this week. We were told this was the only Jerry Lewis goofy face shot in existence.

Who died and made YOU Queen?

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Blog Guy, Since you seem to be writing about television these days, are you following the great Showtime series, The Tudors?

You bet! I don’t know how the writers keep coming up with these twists. How many wives do you think that dude is gonna HAVE before it’s over, anyhow?