Oddly Enough Blog
News, but not the serious kind
Blog Guy, I hate to bother you, but I need your help with something.
See, I maintain an extensive world map with color-coded pins showing everywhere Paris Hilton has been in the last 10 years, you know, day by day.
Really? Then I don’t think I can give you the kind of help it sounds like you need.
So anyway, due to some unfortunate binge drinking-related blackouts, I seem to be missing a few key dates. For instance, August 8, 2004.
Say, Blog Guy, I keep reading about those group tours you organize to that place you call Wackytown, the goofiest place on earth.
Right, that’s Krasnoyarsk, in Siberia. Think you’d like to join us on a trip? We’ve got a gambling junket coming up. Why waste your time in Las Vegas when you can go to a Wackytown casino?
Here’s something you don’t find every day. My Washington Post tells me a guy drove his car off a road and into a canal here in the nation’s capital. The man, who was charged with driving under the influence, told police he had seen a bear.
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People ask me where I get all the stupid stuff in this blog, and I have to say, honestly, the best of it is straight out of the news.
Here’s an example. According to an Associated Press story, officials in Georgia are considering saving money by putting prisoners in fire stations.
Hey Blog Guy, it’s September 14th. This is the day you announce the coveted annual I Hope You’re Proud Of Yourself! award.
Blog Guy, you know that odd city in Siberia that you call Wackytown? I’d like to visit it on one of your organized tours, but I’m wondering how many people there speak English?
You’re talking about Krasnoyarsk. I do know they do have English Language classes at a high security prison camp.
Blog Guy, I’m looking for some of your sage career advice. I enjoy travel, working with animals, and maybe a little danger. Any ideas?
Have you considered the glamorous world of snake smuggling?
The usual. Ladies’ hosiery, probably some duct tape, and, you know, snakes.
Lamar, get in my office!
What’s up, Boss?
Look, you’ve had enough time! I told you if you want to make it in journalism, you need to hack into some voice messages, and I want to see what you’ve got. We’re on deadline!
I think you’ll be pretty happy, Boss. Look at this one. “It’s me. Pick up tuna fish and vodka on the way home.”
What’s up, Blog Guy? You look annoyed.
Yeah, I hate being suckered. I see the programming chief for AMC now says the murder that was the central crime in his network’s Emmy-nominated series, “The Killing,” will be wrapped up in the SECOND season.