Oddly Enough Blog

News, but not the serious kind

Hey look! It’s Super Wastebasket Man!

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Fashion Show security staff. Come in, please. Give me a situation report on the nude intruder we found backstage.

PALESTINIANS-ISRAEL/

Yes sir, we apprehended him. He claimed he was a male model in the show, but he was buck-naked and deranged.

fashion jerasulem 180Good work. Are you positive he’s been neutralized.

Roger that, sir. We threw him into an empty room, still naked. He won’t bother us again.

And you’re POSITIVE there’s nothing in that room?

We triple checked, Sir. Nothing but some old red fabric that was thrown away in a wire wastebasket.

Heartwarming holiday story restores my faith in man…

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Blog Guy, I recall from earlier years that you suffer from a serious problem at Christmas?

Yes, I have too much holiday spirit. It makes me giddy, and I’m no good until something brings me back down to earth, like a very special seasonal story. You know the recent attack on Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi, where a guy threw a souvenir statuette that broke two of his teeth and gashed his lip.

Can’t he just wear a turtleneck?

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We try to keep you up to date on really stupid stuff  going on, and you should know about this. A neo-Nazi gang member has gone on trial for murder in Florida, and a controversy has arisen over some tattoos on his face and neck, notably a swastika and an obscene word.

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No, sorry, that’s not the stupid part. It seems his lawyer argued that the tattoos, which the guy got AFTER his arrest, could prejudice jurors, who might form hasty opinions about a fellow just because he had a swastika carved on his neck.

Hey honey, watch me moon these guys!

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polanski new combo this 500

Blog Guy, it’s me again, the one has been asking a lot of questions about Roman Polanski, that director who is under house arrest in a Swiss Chalet. Now that he’s actually IN the chalet, I would expect you’d have fresh photos of him and his family, and maybe even more farmers standing in the driveway.

You’re in luck, stranger, we have great new photos! Here are actual shots of Polanski and his wife, Emmanuelle Seigner, at the chalet.

It’s tough in the slammer…

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Blog Guy, you wrote about the Swiss chalet where director Roman Polanski may stay under house arrest while he fights extradition over a case of unlawful sex with a 13-year-old girl. The farmer in the driveway was a nice touch, but…

What else did you want to see?

It’s in Gstaad, in the Swiss Alps! Could we please see how the chalet looks with a dusting of snow?

Will he have a valet at the chalet?

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Blog Guy, I’ve been closely following the case of that creepy director Roman Polanski, who apparently will be released under house arrest in Switzerland soon, but I wonder if you can clear up some details for me.

Well, I’m no lawyer, but I’ll do my best.

Thanks. So he’s going to be staying in a Swiss chalet, from what I’ve read. Any idea what it looks like?

Is that a gun in your pocket, or… Oh, it IS a gun!

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It’s that time of year again, when college seniors start asking me for career advice.

“Bob,” writes one student at a northeastern college, “I picked up a glossy pamphlet on the exciting field of professional frisking.

Want some kaBob? Some kaDave?

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Blog Guy, I’m planning a trip to Russia soon and as a hotshot travel writer you know a lot about different cuisines. So like, in Moscow, is there anything I should avoid?

It all depends on your taste, but for the time being I’d steer clear of cheap kebab places.

Ned’s dead, where’s his head?

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Blog Guy, you blogged several times about the missing skull of German writer Friedrich Schiller. I see there’s another famous missing skull now, belonging to Australian outlaw Ned Kelly.

Right. Ned, whose real name was Ed, was the son of Red. Ned was a bushranger and killer, whose gang wore body armor that made them nearly unstoppable.

Another reason not to smoke?

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Continuing on with today’s theme of curious responses by onlookers who are present at a crime scene…

Maybe you’ve already seen our video of a mafia-style hit on a guy with a mafia criminal record. It’s pretty strong stuff, and also fairly surprising.