Oddly Enough Blog

We return now to the Wide World of Brainless Sports!

October 30, 2009

Color me embarrassed. We had a PRETTY BAD error on our file, and is our policy, we had to publicly correct it. It seems we reported that Bulgarian prosecutors are investigating a new gambling game in which drivers defy death by speeding through red lights for bets of up to $2,200.

What do you call that dance, sir?

October 27, 2009

Blog Guy, you’ve been great about career advice, especially offering tips to help figure out if people may have chosen the wrong line of work. Keep it coming, please.Sure. Are you leaving on a business trip? Take off your clothes, look in a full-length mirror and count the number of live python snakes you see taped to your body in stockings.If it’s more than say, two or three, maybe you should be looking on monster.com for a new job.Pythons?  What kind of imbecile would tape that many pythons to his body?The Norwegian kind of imbecile. Customs officials stopped a guy with a tarantula in his bag, so they decided to give him the full body treatment. They found FOURTEEN pythons taped to him.Yikes! I wonder why he didn’t go for 20?Because that would have gotten in the way of the 10 lizards hidden in cans that were also taped to him.Blog Guy, you like this story, don’t you? And if I know you, you’re holding back something that’s even better.Well yes, there was a wonderful quote in one of the papers that covered the story.An official was quoted as saying,  “Customs officers quickly realized the man was smuggling animals, because his whole body was in constant motion.”Duh, I guess it would be! Well, here’s your problem right here, sir!

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Watch out! Number four is gonna blow!

October 19, 2009

Blog Guy, I’m curious about the psychology of fashion models. Do they just wear anything they’re given, or do they have strong personal feelings about the creations?

Slay bells ring, are ya listenin’?

October 16, 2009

The holidays are rushing at us, and if you’re like me, nothing says “Peace on Earth” like the topic of serial killers. So you’ll be happy to know that the 2010 Serial Killer Calendar is now available if you’re looking for a gift for Uncle Lamar, who broke out of maximum security and is knocking on your door with an ax.

A fashion taboo bites the dust…

October 14, 2009

Blog Guy, you know all the dark secrets of the designer fashion business, and it’s time to admit a fatal flaw.

Just 24 beers? How about two dozen, instead?

October 7, 2009

I’m sorry sir, but you can’t drive that tow-truck full of beer onto the motor racing grounds, I’m afraid. It’s over the posted limit.

Baby, you’re the stupidest!

October 5, 2009

Blog Guy, I’m tired of dating smart chicks. Where can I find some stupid ones?

Ya want me back in the shower, Mr. Hitchcock?

September 24, 2009

“Ding-dong!”

“Dear, one of the young ladies from that Manson family up the street is here selling homemade lunchmeat! Can she put us down for some?”

Lookin’ for my Luger, Sugar?

September 21, 2009

Blog Guy, recently you blogged about that Oktoberfest thing in Germany – you know, the party with all the beer and the women with those huge, uh, mugs? I saw a travel ad for it that said, “Come to Germany and get frisky!”

Golly, I don’t have enough pockets for all my cash!

September 18, 2009

If  you get all of your fashion guidance from this blog – and boy, you should be easy to spot in a crowd – you know I pay close attention to police decoy fashions.