Oddly Enough Blog

News, but not the serious kind

The defendant will stop looking at the blogger!

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Some blog readers have been asking why I’m not in Las Vegas covering that O.J. Simpson memorabilia trial. There are several reasons:

simpson-eyes-crop.jpg1. Genuine bloggers don’t usually cover stuff in person because it’s too much work being a reporter.

2. These photos from the trial scare me. I don’t want him giving me one of those stink eye stares. Would you?

3. Now that I know he wants his memorabilia back, I can’t look at him without feeling guilty about owning some Simpson autographs. I mean, if I keep them, how will he ever get more?

You’re SURE we’re supposed to throw these?

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Recently, I ranted here about the sad state of today’s political protesters.

And now, more evidence that protest isn’t what it used to be. Note this caption informing us that these protesters are throwing “cobblestones, Molotov cocktails and shoes” at riot police.

Annie, get your gun!

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fashion-annie-musical-200.jpg Blog Guy, I was mugged at gunpoint. I’m ashamed to go to the police because, well, I think it was a chick who played Annie in that Broadway musical. It was a nightmare!

You were mugged by a nine-year-old?

No, this one is all grown up now. But I’d know that red hair and chipper voice anyplace!

Find the nuclear warhead, Whiskers!

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Blog Guy, in this crazy world today, security is very much on my mind. Are any other countries making progress in protecting their people and property?

cat-security-crop-200.jpgYes. In the most promising advance I’m aware of, several governments have turned their security operations over to cats.

Honey, how was your commute?

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Blog Guy, my commuter train was an hour late again today! Happens all the time! What can we do?

Well, by way of comparison, that happened in the Buenos Aires suburbs today, too.

No shark, Sherlock!

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So, somebody stole a rare shark from an aquarium in England. The owner thinks the thief “came prepared,” because it turns out to steal a shark you have to show up with a big bag full of water, a polystyrene box and a net.

jaws-0730-200.jpgSo let me get this straight. It wasn’t jewel thieves who broke into the wrong shop, huh?

What a thoughtful wedding gift! Part of a horse!

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Folks, we got a wedding to plan! Who’s giving away the bride? The proud father?

No, Salvatore’s in prison.

toto-couple-2-200.jpgHow about the bride’s Uncle Leoluca or her brother Gianni?

Prison.

Um, her brother Giuseppe?

Prison. No, wait! I think Giuseppe got out! HE can give her away!

Welcome to the tribulations of planning a wedding in Sicily for the daughter of a former “boss of bosses.” And it only gets worse.

Do you smell captured car thief?

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mercedes-0721-crop-180.jpgBlog Guy, my car got stolen last week and I’m furious! Is there any real progress on theft-prevention?

For sure. Have you seen the new Mercedes-Benz MS (Maximum Security) model in this photo? It is SO cool! The new security system tracks a would-be thief, snags him around the legs, hoists him upside-down on a retractable pole and holds him until police arrive.

Cheese it, Lefty! It’s Police Pope!

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police-pope-crop-140.jpgOkay guys, this action show concept is a guaranteed hit, so help me brainstorm it.

It’s called ”Police Pope!” See, this guy used to be a cop, and when he becomes the Pope he still misses police work. So they call him in on tough cases. You know, he’s out on that little balcony a lot, and when they need help they flash a signal. He puts on his cop hat, and he’s off!

That’s him! With the big red nose!

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joker-face-160.jpgBlog Guy, I’ve heard the criminal justice system in Peru is very different from ours. Is that true?

I get that question a lot. Yes, it is. You take for instance the simple police line-up. In Peru, the cops make it much more obvious who they think is guilty. Like they will show a real suspect along with three squirrels, three pianos,  three circus clowns or something like that.