Oddly Enough Blog
News, but not the serious kind
What we need is a group of women who will make their own outfits, do their own hair and makeup, and strut the runway, all for free.
Relax, Boss, I’ve found exactly what you just described.
Who are they, Lamar? Who are these amazing, generous fashion angels?
The criminally insane, Boss.
I just showed up over at the State Prison, signed 20 gals out on day passes, put ‘em in a dressing room with fabric and makeup, and voila!
Lamar, you’re a genius! But are they good models? Do they have a “Come hither” glance?
Blog Guy, I’m a young female who wants to become a super heroine, sort of like Wonder Woman. I know she was an Amazon. Any idea where she bought her costume?
I guess Amazon.com would be too obvious?
Oh. That makes sense. You’ve written about a place called Super-Chicks R Us. Are they still in business?
From Romania comes news that the government has proposed a law under which people who practice witchcraft can be fined or even imprisoned if their predictions do not come true. I am NOT making this up.
Now, let’s set aside the fact that such a law seems more appropriate for fortune-tellers than for witches. Maybe job distinctions overlap over there. But whatever predictions they do make are suddenly going to be a LOT less specific…
I love this story. It seems some Mexican smugglers were planning to hurl drugs across the border, using an actual catapult. The Mexican military seized 45 pounds of marijuana and a metal-framed catapult, just south of the Arizona border.
I’m not making this up. The catapult is similar to those used across medieval Europe to fling fire, rocks and rotting corpses into towns under siege.
Blog Guy, you used to have a regular feature called, “What Former Dental Hygienists are Doing.” It was lively, timely and we all loved it, so what happened to it?
I’m sorry, I guess I dropped the ball on that. Give me another chance. Look, here’s the former dental hygienist for Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi.
Welcome back to our regular feature, Human Remains in the News.
It seems burglars tried snorting the cremated remains of a man and two dogs, taken from a Florida home, in the mistaken belief that the ashes were drugs.
I swear I am not making this up. The ashes were stolen a month ago, along with some other stuff, and police learned about the snorting this week when they arrested five teens in connection with another burglary attempt.
As a humor blogger, if there’s one question I get more than any other it’s “Blog Guy, college is so darned expensive these days, how can I afford to send my kids there?”
That’s where I can help out. Not with my own original ideas, you understand, but by quoting an expert – let’s call him Dan – who knows money secrets normally available only to the super-rich.
Although the new year is only a few days old, we may already have identified the most incompetent criminal of 2011.
He is the dimwit in the far left who is about to assassinate a local village politician in the Philippines who, it turns out, is pointing a camera at him at the same time.
What is the matter with people?
All of these ghoulish transactions were clear signs of the onrushing Apocalypse, and yet they somehow pale by comparison to an auction a few days ago.