Oddly Enough Blog

News, but not the serious kind

Why is our pilot wearing a life jacket?

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As a part of the international fashion industry press corps I would never poke fun at the designers, models, creations or glitzy shows. I know which side my thin-sliced sprouted whole grain toast is not buttered on, or however that expression goes.

FRANCE-FASHION/But let’s all think about this one.

Here, from a collection this week at a big fashion show, is a “creation” which looks for all the world like a commercial pilot’s uniform. It comes complete with a life jacket, the kind they show you at the start of every flight.

The photo caption even informs us this creation is from a “ready-to-wear” collection.

Where did they present such a stupid outfit, you may ask?

In Paris, which is over there in Europe, and is currently crawling with security people amid serious warnings of a possible major terrorist attack.

Edelweiss, schnitzel’s nice, ev’ry morning you greet me…

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Blog Guy, I’ve been reading that two men accused of espionage for Libya are on trial in Germany. Are you covering it?

Yes, but privacy laws in the German courts are very strict, as we’ve seen before.

Look sweetie, news we can use!

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CUBA/

We journalists are trying really hard these days to give people content that really makes a difference to them.

The very technical news media name for it is “news you can use.” A good example is an actual story from Mexico this week…

The best job title on earth?

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Boss? How come you’re in the office reading crime reports on such a nice day?

THAILAND-ARMSDEALER/Are you kidding, Lamar? This is what I’ve been waiting for! Look at the photos of this suspected arms dealer, Viktor Bout, also known as the “Merchant of Death.”

Majestic swan or Mafia thug? You decide!

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AUSTRIA/

Blog Guy, I know you study organized crime. What’s this I hear about an upstart gang moving in on the rackets?

That would be the Swan Gang. Very nasty. Don’t mess with them.

Swans? Those magnificent birds? But they’re beautiful!

swan crop 280Not when they’re in your face threatening to burn down your linen supply business. Look at this undercover police photo of their godfather, Swan Corleone, intimidating folks at Swan Lake.

Merry Christmas, Charlie!

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USA/

Normally I wouldn’t bother being snarky about actor Charlie Sheen and his ongoing problems with the law. It’s just too easy.

He pleaded guilty this week to assaulting his wife, and was sentenced to drug and alcohol rehabilitation. You may recall Sheen was arrested after his wife told police he pulled a knife on her and threatened to have her killed last Christmas.

Check the neck, I don’t eat meat…

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ellen vegan 490

Blog Guy, I know you love animals.

I’m thinking of becoming vegan. I’ve read that Ellen Degeneres and her spouse Portia de Rossi are both vegans. Is that right?

vegan guy vertical 220I don’t believe so. Look at their necks.

Excuse me? Their necks?

Yes. You can clearly see they don’t have VEGAN tattooed on their necks, which of course is how you normally spot a vegan. Like this guy on the right. Now HE’S a vegan.

Then those animals FORCED me to shop!

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MARKETS-PRECIOUS/

Okay, now I just feel like a total jerk.

We have a great story from Beijing about officials issuing an advisory on Hong Kong travel after a video surfaced showing tourists being insulted and “forced to shop” by a tour guide. I’m not making this up.

Indeed, the story says a 65-year-old tourist died from a heart attack in Hong Kong, after arguing with a tour guide over forced shopping there.

I don’t recall, Your Honor, it’s all a blur

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GERMANY/

Do not adjust your monitor, these two guys have intentionally distorted eyes because, we are told, they are on trial and their faces have been blurred “in accordance with German privacy laws.”

Are you kidding me? Because it looks like the agency that did the blurring just phoned it in. Is there anybody who wouldn’t recognize these guys if you ever saw them again?

Inmate Hamster, welcome to The Rock!

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PHILIPPINES/

Okay men, I have some good news and bad news for you from Warden Johnson, so listen up!

The good news is, from now on we’re gonna have electricity here at The Rock.