Oddly Enough Blog

News, but not the serious kind

You’re Queen for a Day!

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Blog Guy, I want to be royalty in my next life. Those people get to do whatever they want. Command performances, the best art…

You’re so right. We sent an Oddly Enough team around with Queen Elizabeth yesterday, so you could see the rich tapestry that unfolds for her.

Huzzah! How exciting!

First up, we toured a bottling plant, and got a first-hand account of how beverages are put into bottles. It’s a show most people can only dream of.

Oh. And then?

The royal tour of an umbrella shop, watching a guy dazzle us with a display of umbrella dexterity. “You see this cloth-wrapped stick, Your Majesty? Presto! Now it’s a device to keep rain off of you!”

You put your handcuffs on, you take your handcuffs off…

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Some of you have asked me about that new program down there in Mexico, where nightclubs are being operated by federal government police.

I think the experiment seems to be working, judging from some fresh photos I’ve just seen from nightspots in Ciudad Juarez.

When life hands you urine, make Urinade!

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A few days ago I blogged about plans to create a soft drink made from cow urine. Seriously. We even discussed ad and marketing uh, challenges to what we dubbed ”Mellow Yellow.”

This was a popular post, I gather because readers want to make damned sure they don’t go out and buy some by accident. So we’ve talked to folks associated with the project and done a video report.

I’m drunk as a Peruvian janitor!

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It turns out that Peru’s top court has ruled that workers cannot be fired for being drunk on the job.

I’ll repeat that, so it can sink in. Workers. Drunk as a skunk. Can’t be fired. In Peru.

There’s eggnog in your hair, Claire!

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Blog Guy, my mom gave me a huge crystal punch bowl. It’s lovely, but I don’t entertain very much. Should I just sell it?

No! Wear it! Punch bowl hats are going to be THE thing next season, as you can see in these fashion photos taken just yesterday.

Hit the trenches! Falling wenches!

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Blog Guy, I was fascinated by your report from the Millionaire Fair. What else can you say about what those wacky rich people are up to?

It seems rich folks don’t like to go up to a bar for drinks, so now chicks drop upside-down from the ceiling to fill their glasses.

If it’s September, this must be Oktoberfest!

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oktoberfest-2-0921-160.jpgBlog Guy, I saw a picture today from Oktoberfest in Germany. But it’s only September!

I believe it’s already October in Germany, because of the different time zones. So yes, they’ve started Oktoberfest, their world-famous festival of drinking, smoking and cleavage.

Politicians staggeringly well qualified?

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Blog Guy, you’ve been making the point that no U.S. politician can hope to win without eating a lot of ice cream in public. But I suppose it’s like that everywhere?

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There’s always something, but it isn’t always ice cream.

Take Germany. You see these politicians chugging beer from mugs the size of an oil refinery? Ten minutes from now they won’t remember what country they’re in.

This wine was made yesterday!

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Blog Guy, I know you keep up with new technology.  I read that now they can determine the age of a wine by analyzing X-rays emitted when the bottles are placed under ion beams produced by a particle accelerator. 

Yes. Or, another way would be to just look at the label. After all, home particle accelerators take up valuable room where you could have another plasma TV.

Fräulein, would you hold these mugs?

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oktoberfest-mugs-2-140.jpgBlog Guy, if I’m not mistaken, it’s time to unveil the official beer mug of the upcoming Oktoberfest. Could you please run a photograph of a couple of those big mugs?

Um, yeah, here. I apologize. It’s not as good as I would have liked, but if I’m not specific enough about what I want, the photographers sometimes clutter up the background with, you know, unbuttoned blouses and cleavage and stuff like that. Still, you can see the set pretty well here.