Oddly Enough Blog

News, but not the serious kind

Sticky and Sweet and tedious…

Photo
-

Blog Guy, I’ve printed out all of your posts about photojournalism and memorized them, and I’m ready for more. What is the single most important element of a newsworthy photo?

It needs to have Madonna in it.

Uh, not to question your expertise or anything, but wouldn’t that get tiresome?

You’d think so, wouldn’t you? But just since she started her “Sticky and Sweet” tour we’ve issued nearly 200 shots of her, and the total for 2008 is up around 500 Madonna photos.

Aren’t all those concert shots just about the same?

No. Some of them may actually be published, like the ones you see here, while others are so gross nobody would ever use them.

You, who are on the oats…

Photo
-

Blog Guy, I know you’re an authority on 1960s music. What’s David Crosby up to these days? I thought I saw him advertising oatmeal on television!

You’re thinking of Wilford Brimley, the white-haired actor in those ads.

No, I believe you’re confusing Brimley with that Amish guy on the Quaker Oats cartons.

When celebrities go goofy!

Photo
-

Blog Guy, you’ve written about your Goofy Face Museum and Doughnut Shop, that popular tourist attraction in Washington, DC.

My family stood in line for tickets there and loved it! What a magical place! We even bought the John McCain Calendar and the Goofy Face Mug Set at your gift shop!

For every bathroom in America!

Photo
-

Blog Guy, I’m stumped about what to get for my boyfriend for Christmas. He loves good literature.

Look no further. I recommend a book called Oddly Enough, edited by Robert Basler. It’s a collection of absurd but true odd news stories, with illustrations you’ll treasure for years to come.

A large coffee and 60 drums of Napalm, please

Photo
-

I may as well not hide my feelings. I don’t know if you saw Britney Spears’ act on TV today, but it was another sign of the coming Apocalypse, an example of decaying moral values in this country.

I know you’re saying, “Shut up! She put on an awesome show, going through a ring of fire in a sexy outfit!”

I can’t resist a man who bathes!

Photo
-

I have GREAT news for guys!

There has been a big new survey to find out what makes men seem handsome, and you know what the top thing is? Smoldering eyes? Nope. Chiseled features? Nope. Good hygiene? Yep.

So, armed with that information, here are the sort of pickup lines you should be using:

Pull up a chair, rich guy!

Photo
-

Readers ask me all the time, “Bob, you’ve delivered pizzas to a lot of rich people’s houses. So what kind of furniture do they have?”

Well, take a peek at a Millionaire Fair, where folks with too much money go to spend it.

Well, this is just too sick!

Photo
-

Warning: readers who are easily disturbed or offended should not read this item.

A Colorado judge is trying a new punishment for people charged with being too noisy. He sentences them to an hour of listening to Barry Manilow.

The judge says he is “teaching manners to people,” and that his tactic is working.

Here, rats, follow the lemon meringue!

Photo
-

Okay, creative staff at Acme Marketing, we’ve been hired by the little town of Hamlin, in Germany. You remember the story of the Pied Piper of Hamlin, right?

Hundreds of years ago Hamlin was overrun with rats, so they hired the Pied Piper, who used fresh-baked pies to lead them away.

Supermodels the size of ants!

-

Blog Guy, I heard there was a Victoria’s Secret fashion show on Saturday. Do you have a lot of pictures from it? Please, Please?

Not a lot, just 80 or so… Here are some of them. Just click on the little ones to make them bigger.