Oddly Enough Blog

News, but not the serious kind

Will you be taking those grenades all the way to Belgium?

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Sometimes I just don’t understand stuff, so maybe you can help me with this exercise in logic.

The security folks at Newark’s airport were X-raying checked baggage a few days ago when they found five hand grenades in a woman’s luggage. Yes, five.

According to our story, the grenades had been disarmed, and the woman surrendered them “without incident.”

She was then allowed to board the flight, bound for Belgium.

Excuse me? These are among the questions I have about this…

    Isn’t carrying more than two hand grenades already by definition an incident? If the grenades didn’t pose a threat, why did she have to surrender them? Would you want to sit next to somebody who tried packing five grenades in her suitcase? Why would a person go to Belgium?

Another story about the same incident said the Transportation Security Administration “could not say what the woman had intended to do with the grenades once she reached Europe.”

What’s this-here doohickey for?

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Blog Guy, I could use some of your famous career advice.

My mom gave me a glossy brochure entitled, “The Glamorous Field of Dismantling Old Nuclear Bombs,” and I signed up for their training course.

It’s real interesting, but I wondered what you thought of that career path?

What’s wrong with this picture?

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Blog Guy, I’ve been seeing photos of well-armed rebels in Yemen in recent days, and I notice a lot of swollen cheeks. Are those plucky lads in need of major dental care?

No, don’t worry about that. These guys are just getting stoned on a leaf called qat.

Lemme just hack away at this gizmo…

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Blog Guy, I’m looking for a new career and I know your advice is the best. I picked up a colorful brochure called, “The Exciting World of Battlefield Rocket Repair,” and I was wondering if you think that’s a good way to go?

That brochure is really making the rounds, isn’t it? I hear from lots of young people, captivated by the opening lines, “Hey, have you always wanted to see Libya?”

Honk if this seems strange…

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Strange days have found us
Strange days have tracked us down

Blog Guy, how’s come you’re playing a Doors album really loud? What’s up with that?

Oh, I think it’s that war in Libya. It’s getting weirder and weirder, and starting to remind me of tracks off that “Strange Days” album.

Let’s do something spontaneous, Baby!

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Hey Blog Guy, how come you’re sitting in that huge tub of ice cubes up to your neck?

That’s my new “home.” I eat, sleep and blog here, under constant monitoring.

Looks like that one passed the test!

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Sarge, look sharp. I’ve got a job for you.

Sure thing, Captain, Sir!

We’ve captured all these big weapons from the Gaddafi loyalists, and we need to test ‘em.

Can you take care of that? And start with that big anti-aircraft gun over there!

Seeing Libya, from surface to air!

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Blog Guy, I could use some of your famous travel advice. With Libya being in the news lately I’d love to go see it, but I’m concerned about getting around. I’m not even sure how to get there. I’ll be starting my trip in Mexico, so I need to get…

From the Halls of Montezuma to the Shores of Tripoli? No problem. Libya is already building up tourism, and offers fast, efficient ways to get from place to place, using the thousands of  unused missiles littering the country.

So what’s the worst that could happen?

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Sarge, if it’s okay with you, I’m gonna take a little cigarette break.

Okay Lonnie, there’s not much goin’ on here right now. Say, are you just gonna stand that rocket-propelled grenade up on end like that?

Sorting through Gaddafi’s knick-knacks…

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Guys, listen up! We’ve captured some sort of depot and bunker that belonged to Gaddafi!

This is a great victory for us, but we need to sort through it. Lamar, you keep your squad here and make a list of everything you find.