Oddly Enough Blog
News, but not the serious kind
Blog Guy, my friend told me about a big new miracle diet. I’m skeptical because it seems so unusual, but I thought I’d ask you.
I’m guessing you mean that Cinnabon Diet.
Yes! That’s it! Does it really work?
It must. Look at the women in these pictures. See how pretty their faces are? Great legs, nice arms…
All they’ve had to eat for six months are swirly, delicious, buttery, warm-from-the-oven Cinnabons. Morning, noon and night.
Gosh, it IS a miracle diet! Still, I can’t help noticing their hips look just a tad, you know…
Okay Lamar, business hasn’t picked up at all, so I hope you REALLY saved money on today’s fashion show. We’re just about broke.
Don’t worry, Boss, this one is practically a freebie.
For starters, the dress we’re showing was made entirely with 40 starched linen napkins and some super-glue. The model was a really good sport.
Blog Guy, you’ve helped lots of people with unusual fashion needs, and I hope you can do something for me. I’m an attractive woman who was born with no neck.
You mean you have a very short neck, right?
No. I have no visible neck whatever. Damnedest thing you ever saw. Just a torso with a head on it. I mean, I can’t even look left and right at traffic lights.
Lamar, now that our fashion show is underway, please tell me you managed to keep costs down. I hope you didn’t throw away a lot of money on extravagances and luxury doodads.
We’re on the same page, Boss. I didn’t even rent an expensive backstage dressing room this time. Look out there, our models will just change outfits onstage.
It was a year when models hit the international fashion runways looking like kitchen utensils, nutcrackers, forest creatures and, well, the recently deceased.
You know it was a bad year in fashion when my blog item that was headlined “The worst dress in the history of Earth?” barely makes it onto my Top 10 Worst Fashions list.
Blog Guy, I’m thinking about becoming a drug dealer, or maybe even a drug kingpin, but fashion is important to me. Can you give me some idea of the dress code for this exciting field?
Well, first I should advise you strongly against choosing this profession. It is illegal in many states, and even some foreign countries.
Goofy was the operative theme for November.
Statistics for this blog show that readers flocked to items on a goofy breast examination scam, the first goofy look at a future queen and a strange choice for a new piece of art for the Louvre.
The top three items for the month?
A hard-hitting theory about who may be plotting against our supermarket tabloids, a look at a Victoria’s Secret audience participation gimmick that went horribly wrong, and a self-help test to determine who is smarter, you or your Thanksgiving turkey.