Blog Guy, I’ve always wanted to see a whole bunch of people cramming mangoes in their mouth as fast as they can. Can you do anything for me?

That’s easy. Our researchers quickly came up with 43 seconds of a mango-eating contest where the winner walks off with a box of mangoes.

Wow, thanks! I guess I should have made it harder. What I really want is folks at a tango in Durango playing bingo and feeding mangoes to dingos.

Sure. Give me until Tuesday, I’ll throw in Ringo playing a bongo in the Congo.

More stuff from Oddly Enough

Blog Guy, I know you sometimes indulge your readers’ fantasies. I collect photographs of really rich people eating ice cream. It isn’t a large collection, but I’m hoping you can help get me some good ones.

I can’t resist a challenge, so I put our shooters on this one. I rejected a shot of Queen Elizabeth drinking a cherry Slurpee from 7-Eleven, on the grounds that it isn’t really ice cream.

But here’s the good news: a photo of billionaire Warren Buffett eating ice cream on a stick! We’re also staking out a Baskin-Robbins near Bill Gates’ house, in case he gets hungry. Is this a great blog, or what?

More about rich people

Billionaire financier and Berkshire Hathaway CEO Warren Buffett eats ice cream during the annual Berkshire Hathaway shareholders meeting in Omaha, Nebraska, May 3, 2008. REUTERS/Carlos Barria

More stuff from Oddly Enough

Blog Guy, it was so interesting to learn about those bidet things in your blog recently. You give your readers a genuine feel for other cultures. It made me wonder, do they take showers in Europe the same way we do here?

They do shower, but it’s different. They get hundreds of people together, and everyone drops some mints into bottles of cola. This creates a shower that drenches them in fizzy froth.

Yuck! Doesn’t that leave their skin all sticky?

No. Apparently in Europe they shower with their clothes on. Watch this video:

Related post: Babe, can we skip this museum? 

More stuff from Oddly Enough

We’re starting to get more and more photos of events like this, where you eat lunch at a table that is suspended by a crane, four miles up in the air.

Okay, maybe not exactly four whole miles, but still pretty high up. I believe a 1960s rock group said it most eloquently: “Kicks just keep getting harder to find.”

I’ll be candid about this. It isn’t natural. If I’m going to eat at this altitude, I expect to be surrounded on all sides by a commercial airliner. And if I’m ever drugged and kidnapped and I wake up dangling like this, well, they’d better be feeding me something like pea soup, that looks about the same no matter how many times it ends up on my plate, if you catch my meaning.

Suspension slideshow, and more thoughts on heights

Hungarian journalists have lunch at a new event venue which offers dinners “in the sky”, for guests seated around a table lifted by a crane above Heroes Square in Budapest, April 23, 2008. REUTERS/ Karoly Arvai

More stuff from Oddly Enough

From Moscow, news that some billionaire is starting a magazine named Snob. I’m serious.

This is a turning point in publishing. If he can market directly to our worst character flaws, watch out! We’ll see slick, glossy magazines like Big Jerky Butthead, and Wanton Hussy.  Subscribe to Town Drunk, and get a year of Stupid Blabbermouth, free!

“Honey, has my April issue of Eternally Damned Adulterer arrived yet?”

“No dear, but your new copy of Slack-Jawed Yokel is on the coffee table.”

More stuff from Oddly Enough

Italian fashion designer Valentino at the Cannes Film Festival in 2007 photo.  REUTERS/Yves Herman

Once upon a time, Grandma sent her three grandchildren into the woods to gather blackberries, so she could make a fine dessert for dinner.

The first child returned with a pail of plump blackberries. The second came back with red holly berries, which happen to be poisonous. The third went into the city, pulled the Big Con Switcheroo on a bunch of dimwit business guys, and brought grandma a bucket of BlackBerry handhelds with high resale value.

Grandma tossed the plump blackberries out for the robins. She baked the holly berries into a festive pie which she sent to the IRS along with her tax check. Then she pawned the handhelds for a bundle, and tonight she’s eating at Cheesecake Factory. The children get their fine dessert, and granny is knocking back Tanqueray martinis like there’s no tomorrow.

And they all lived happily ever-after.

Trashed Blackberry phones in a bucket during the NBC Today Show in New York, April 21, 2008. REUTERS/ Lucas Jackson

More stuff from Oddly Enough

Hey blog guy, I’m planning my wedding for June, and I’m on a tight budget. I know you’ve been a professional event planner. Can you give me some money-saving some tips?

Sure. Here are four ideas that really work… 

 1) Print your own invitations. It’s cheaper, plus you can put the wrong address on some and the wrong date on others, cutting the reception crowd in half. 

2) Serve itty-bitty food. As the photos show, teeny burgers are chic and  elegant. You can feed 200 guests on two pounds of ground beef. Fill up the rest of the plate with festive parsley.

3) Serve colorful drinks, like red Two-Buck Chuck, in rented dribble glasses.  When guests start staining, they’ll stop drinking. Many will leave.  

4) For reception entertainment, live music is passé. Three words: cheap tattoo artist.

More money-saving wedding tips: Thanks for coming, now go…

Miniature burgers are seen at a wedding show in New York April 2, 2008.  REUTERS/ Lucas Jackson.

More stuff from Oddly Enough

If you’re thinking of a public relations career, watch and learn. Italy recently did a recall of some mozzarella cheese linked to dioxin contamination. Okay, so how do they restore public confidence in the product?

a) Trot out scientists to say how safe it is
b) Trot out doctors to say how safe it is
c) Feed it to gladiators to show it doesn’t kill them

If you chose gladiators, you may have a future in PR! They fed cheese to these guys who wear flimsy costumes and pose with tourists in Rome, and I guess it worked. But I keep thinking hey, didn’t gladiators go to the Colosseum to die, anyway? So who cares that a gladiator is willing to eat the stuff now? “Sure pal, give me another mouthful, I may as well get it over with.”

More gladiator news: Put on your “glad” rags!

Man dressed as a gladiator eats buffalo mozzarella cheese in front of the Colosseum in Rome April 2, 2008. Italian buffalo mozzarella cheese producers organized a demonstration to prove the quality of their cheese. REUTERS/Tony Gentile

More stuff from Oddly Enough

“Look, I’ve only got a few months left, and I don’t want to complain, but are you REALLY sure these new Secret Service uniforms make sense?

“I mean, sure, they’re fine for your Thursday night Secret Service Folk Dancing Club meetings. I guess they’re okay for that Secret Service Fortune-Telling sideline you all have going, and your Secret Service Oompah Band. But if you get to wear cool outfits like that when you’re on duty, shouldn’t I get to wear one, too?”

Related post: Big news, no ooze!

U.S. President George W. Bush waits as he is introduced to deliver his speech in St. Mark’s Square in Zagreb April 5, 2008.  REUTERS/Kevin Lamarque

More stuff from Oddly Enough

Blog Guy,

I‘m aware that you are something of an Old Testament scholar. Someone told me recently that in the story of David and Goliath, David was eating ice cream while he slew Goliath with his slingshot. Could this be true?

Well, an often-overlooked detail in some translations of that story has David eating a scoop of Baskin Robbins Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough during the battle. It seems he only bought one dip because he wasn’t sure he’d be around to finish it.

In that part of the world, ice cream and slingshots still go together like, well, whatever. Check out this photo taken just today.

Meanwhile, more slingshot news:

A Palestinian protester uses a sling against Israeli soldiers while eating an ice-cream during a protest opposed to Israel’s security fence in the West Bank village of Bilin April 4, 2008. REUTERS/Baz Ratner

More stuff from Oddly Enough