I apologize in advance for this one, since I know a lot of readers, even entire families, enjoy my blog while at the breakfast table.

Still, my logic is this: Nobody shields ME from this crap, so you all may as well see what’s going on in the real world, the same as I have to.

Having said that, welcome to a brand-new feature I like to call, “Hey, I’m Tryin’ to Eat my Hash Browns Here!”

I hope you enjoy it. And if you want to buy poster-size copies of these photographs for your kitchen wall, I’m sure something can be arranged.

Please remember to vote in the Coolest Dude poll

Be somebody! Join the Oddly Enough blog network

Competitors wrestle in the over 115 kg category during the European Sumo Championships in Renens near Lausanne August 23, 2009. REUTERS/Denis Balibouse

More stuff from Oddly Enough

Blog Guy, I have a recipe for armadillo. Do you know a place to buy good ones?

Sure, I go down to Brazil and get mine from Leonardo’s Armadillos.

Leonardo? Didn’t he used to have a shop in Amarillo?

Yes, but Leonardo’s Amarillo Armadillos got closed down for certain peccadillos.

Say no more, I’ve heard all about those armadillo peccadillos! How does Leonardo sell his armadillos?

By the kilo.

Yummy! Armadillo by the kilo! So if I go down to Brazil, how will I know Leonardo?

He’ll be smoking a cigarillo…

Please remember to vote in the Coolest Dude poll

Impress your friends. Join the Oddly Enough blog network

Leonardo Lima da Silva, 17, offers for sale to passing vehicles an armadillo that he and his brother hunted to earn cash, near Maraba in the Brazilian Amazon region, August 18, 2009. REUTERS/Paulo Santos

More stuff from Oddly Enough

Blog Guy, I’m afraid this suicide bomb trend is spreading, and it scares me.

Me too. There are way too many kinds of explosive gadgets. I saw this photo of a woman wearing a device made of an alarm clock and sausages.

Sausages? They don’t even explode, do they?

Sure. In many parts of the world they’re also called bangers.

But if you look at the real caption, you’ll see she’s actually protesting on the right side of an issue.

Maybe, but she could still have terrorist links…

Links? LINKS? I get it, Blog Guy. You’ve hit rock bottom.

I know, but it’s a Saturday in August. So if you want frank news in the wurst way, look no furter….

Join the Oddly Enough blog network

Follow this blog on Twitter at rbasler

Activist wearing belt with sausages and an alarm clock takes part in rally protesting Afghanistan’s “Family Law,” in Kiev, August 21, 2009. Afghan authorities passed a law allowing men to deny their wives food if they refuse to obey their husbands’ sexual demands. REUTERS/Konstantin Chernichkin

More stuff from Oddly Enough

Quick quiz: In this photo on the right, President Obama is saying to the Kroger manager…

• “Five bucks for clementines? I pay $3.99 at the Safeway near the White House!
• “What the frick is a clementine?”
• “Do you sell these things in heavy syrup in a can?
• “I’m thinkin’ of gettin’ these for my death panels. You know how many pounds it takes to kill a really old person?”

Actually, the most interesting thing that happened at that Kroger visit was when Obama took a piece of fruit and ate it in front of everybody. The White House said he paid for it “seconds later.”

Well, maybe so, but I’ve tried the old, “Oh, I was GONNA pay you for that six-pound Cadbury bar I ate in aisle four,” and guess how well it worked for ME?

Join the Oddly Enough blog network

Follow this blog on Twitter at rbasler

Above: President Barack Obama holds a town hall meeting about health care at the Kroger Supermarket in Bristol, Virginia, July 29, 2009.

Right: Obama holds up a piece of fruit after biting into it.

REUTERS photos by Larry Downing

More stuff from Oddly Enough

Blog Guy, our family is going to Berlin for a vacation. Are there any museums we don’t want to miss?

For sure! Take your kids to check out the new condom museum, with the singing, dancing penis. It seems that a family planning group has…

Excuse me, Blog Guy, but that isn’t a penis, it’s a German national dish. According to these captions, this is a museum devoted to Curry Wurst - hot pork sausage seasoned with ketchup and curry powder.

Ewwwwww! Then I take back my advice to bring your small kids. They shouldn’t see something like curry wurst at a young age.

Oh, I don’t know. The museum tells about all varieties of the dish, even Luxury Sausage, “for the very special moments in life, curry wurst with gold leaf, served with champagne.”

Oh right. Nothing says luxury like a pimped-up sausage. Try saying this to your girlfriend: “Honey, I won the national lottery today, so tonight it’s gold leaf curry wurst and bubbly! Honey? Honey?”

Join the Oddly Enough blog network

Follow this blog on Twitter at rbasler

Above: A person dressed as a curry wurst mascot poses outside the entrance to the newly opened Curry Wurst Museum in Berlin, August 13, 2009.

Left: A display case shows a selection of curry sausage dishes, at the newly-opened museum. Curry Wurst is a German national dish that consists of a hot pork sausage seasoned with tomato ketchup and curry powder, and served with chips or bread rolls.

REUTERS photos by Tobias Schwarz

More stuff from Oddly Enough

Okay, members of the Iceland Citizens Group, thanks for coming on such short notice. You all know the problem.

Ingibjorg Egilsdottir, Miss Iceland, is frolicking in the Bahamas before the Miss Universe Pageant, and - I’ll be very blunt - when it’s over, why in God’s name would she leave there and return to a place called Iceland?

So, we’ve made a great list of reasons she should come home when the pageant is over:

5. Our food! Two words: liver sausage!

3. You don’t know anybody. You’ll be lonely in The Bahamas.

2. Your clothes are back in Iceland. You’ll have nothing to wear!

And the number one reason for you to come home to Iceland:

1. It’s August! Any day now, a tourist will come!

Join the Oddly Enough blog network

Follow this blog on Twitter at rbasler

Ingibjorg Egilsdottir, Miss Iceland 2009, ahead of the Miss Universe 2009 pageant in the Bahamas. Miss Universe 2009 will be crowned on August 23. REUTERS /Miss Universe Organization L.P., LLLP/Handouts

More stuff from Oddly Enough

Quick quiz: If you have a meal in The Gulf region and can’t quite place the distinctive, piquant, exotic flavor, it’s most likely…

a) Amba, a savory mango pickle condiment

b) Cardamom seeds mixed with cumin

c) Mahlab, made from the St.Lucie Cherry

d) About 30 pounds of desert sand embedded at high speed during the cooking process

That’s right, it’s d), so don’t try to chew every little bit of it.

Check out the masked dude below, just going along roasting his chickens in the middle of a sandstorm.

Meanwhile, for those of you worried about nutrition, just consider this dish enough roughage to prepare for four colonoscopies in a row.

Join the Oddly Enough blog network

Follow this blog on Twitter at rbasler

A worker roasts chickens at a roadside restaurant during a sandstorm in Baghdad July 29, 2009. REUTERS/Saad Shalash

More stuff from Oddly Enough

What’s wrong, Blog Guy? I don’t understand!

Huh? You don’t understand what?

I’ve been seeing pictures of former governor Sarah Palin yesterday serving hot dogs as she left the governor’s job.  Isn’t that a natural for you? Why aren’t you all over it?

Oh, that. It’s just too obvious. Too easy. What would I even say?

Come on, straighten up, Mister! You’d say like, Sarah Palin’s wurst job? Or look at the buns on that governor? Or losers and wieners? Or I know, Sarah the Redhot Mama?

Those are awful. I wouldn’t stoop that low, to be frank.

Frank? I get it! I knew I’d see a smile on that face. Now slap a goofy headline on this sucker, and you’re done for the day. It’s like putting lipstick on a pig!

Join the Oddly Enough blog network

Follow this blog on Twitter at rbasler

Alaska Governor Sarah Palin serves hot dogs to well-wishers at the annual Governor’s Picnic in Fairbanks, Alaska, July 26, 2009. Former Republican U.S. Vice-presidential candidate Palin stepped down as Alaska governor on Sunday. REUTERS/ Nathaniel Wilder

More stuff from Oddly Enough

Blog Guy, you seem to know quite a lot about how the military works in various countries, so I have a question.

I’ll do my best.

I was wondering how the paramilitary police carry watermelons in China.

I get that question a lot, and I believe this photo illustrates the technique they use.

Awesome, thanks! Uh, Blog Guy, what’s that other picture doing there?

Oh, I have a new widget on my blogging tool that automatically sorts similar photos and puts them together, to save me the trouble.

But…

Yeah, I guess it still has some bugs in it.

Go for the bronze! Join the Oddly Enough blog network

Follow this blog on Twitter at rbasler

A model presents a creation by designer Paraiso for Colombia’s brand Armonia in Cali, July 9, 2009. REUTERS /Jaime Saldarriaga

A Chinese paramilitary policeman carries melons as he walks past two fellow police officers in riot gear in Urumqi, July 13, 2009. REUTERS /David Gray

More stuff from Oddly Enough

Blog Guy, you do a wonderful job of keeping us up on what the elite are doing. Where is the Smart Set this week, so we can once again envy the lush life?

There’s only one place to find the Beautiful People this week, awash in a sea of red scarves at the San Fermin festival in Spain!

It’s time to run with the bulls, but it’s also a time for chic parties. As you can see here, the Beautiful People are out in force, enjoying fine local food and wine.

You know, I notice that the Beautiful People seem to be doing a lot of retching and puking.

What did you expect? You asked about the lush life, and I gave you lushes.

All of your captions always refer to these people as “revelers.” What does that mean?

I believe the definition of reveler is “somebody you’d never give your real phone number to.”

Avoid hearing loss. Join the Oddly Enough blog network

Follow this blog on Twitter at rbasler

Above: Assorted revelers: REUTERS photos

Left: A drunk reveler kneels on the ground as he tries to enter a building before the first day of the running of the bulls during the San Fermin festival in Pamplona, July 7, 2009. REUTERS /Susana Vera

More stuff from Oddly Enough