Oddly Enough Blog

News, but not the serious kind

Name your poison, folks…

Photo

INDONESIA/

Good evening, folks, welcome to Snake & Shake, home of the Sssssssssizzling Cobra Burger! I’ll be your server tonight. Have you decided what you want?

Yes. My wife will have the broiled lobster, please.

INDONESIA/Very good choice. Please walk on over to that tank and select your lobster, ma’am…

And, for me, I think I’ll try the Sssssssizzling Cobra Burger! That’s made with 100 percent fresh cobra meat, right?

It sure is, sir.  Now if you’ll just step into that glass booth filled with slithering cobras, you can select the snake you want and bring it out.

Dispensing with Kate Middleton

Photo

pez faces 490

Blog Guy, now that Prince William’s royal wedding is less than a month away, what’s the strangest souvenir you’ve seen so far?

AUSTRIA/That would be this set of PEZ dispensers, one of which features the prince. The candy comes out where it usually does, I guess.

That’s quite an accent you have there…

Photo

WEATHER HURRICANES NEW ORLEANS

Blog Guy, I need some of your job-hunting advice. I was working on a résumé, but then I stopped.

RIBEIROOh, you MUST resume your résumé. Why did you stop?

I needed lunch. I’m eating a clear beef broth and some healthy Japanese soybeans my mom sent.

Juicy fruits in our birthday suits?

Photo

UKRAINE-FASHION/

Sit down, sir. As your neighborhood bank manager I appreciate you coming to us for your small business loan. Now, tell me a little about your idea.

It’s pretty simple. I plan to launch Lamar’s Buck Naked Door-to-Door Fruit.

You like ‘em runny, honey?

Photo

BOSNIA/

Thank you for calling International Department of Festivals, how may we help you?

Well, our little town doesn’t have any kind of an annual festival to attract tourists. We’d like to get in on the action, so I thought I’d check with you to see what’s available.

Is this the express line?

Photo

PHILIPPINES/

Blog Guy, it’s a couple of days before the end of February and there hasn’t been a single sign of the onrushing Apocalypse this month. I’m feeling much better already.

ice cream buffett 220 thisThen you’re living in a dream world, buddy. I just saw one of the clearest signs ever. It turns out a specialist ice cream parlor plans to serve up breast milk ice cream.

Along came a slider who sat down beside her…

Photo

fashion sliders 490

Lamar, we’ve got another big fashion show today. What have you done to cut costs? I’m worried about this rule that we have to have food for the models.

COLOMBIA/Are you kidding, Boss? That costs us nothing! I just put out the five sliders again.

Be sure to wear some flour in your hair…

Photo

 

YEMEN-PROTEST/

Welcome back to a regular little feature we like to call, “Stuff maybe we should have mentioned in the photo caption, but didn’t.”

Pay close attention. I know this guy here looks like somebody with pieces of bread taped onto his head.

Who’s your crawdaddy now?

Photo

You get a line and I’II get a pole,
And we’ll go down to the Crawdad hole,
Honey, sugar baby, mine,

Blog Guy, you look preoccupied. What are you doing?

If you must know, I’m pounding out my next million dollar screenplay for Hollywood. It’s a science fiction story, ripped from today’s headlines.

Dry your geckos perfectly, every time!

Photo

sonoma coconuts 490

Blog Guy, I know you’re a serious foodie, and I have a kitchen appliance question.

Sure. Williams-Sonoma, about $200.00.

Excuse me? I didn’t even ask the question yet.

INDONESIAIt doesn’t matter. Just go to their Website and you’ll find an expensive electrical appliance for every job you have in the kitchen.