Oddly Enough Blog
News, but not the serious kind
The stuff dream photos are made of…
Hey, Blog Guy, I’m here! Do you recognize me?
I am in the presence of the Ghost of Christmas Yet To Come?
No, you dimwit. This isn’t “A Christmas Carol.” I’m the guy who sets up all those great fantasy photos for your readers, so I’m sorry to see it’s going away.
Well, thanks for all your good work. You’ve pulled off pictures I would have thought impossible, especially the ones involving world leaders.
You’re much too kind, Blog Guy. With the huge budget you gave me, let’s just say miracles could be performed.
I loved that time you got Nicolas Sarkozy to grab…
Farewell to the Gaddafi Goof-O-Rama
Blog Guy, have you been crying? What’s the matter?
Oh, you know, I just hate to see Muammar Gaddafi go.
Are you nuts? He was a brutal dictator, overthrown by his own people!
Sure, but he was a madcap, zany goofball, too. He was in a class all by himself, and my blog was richer for him.
So it’s all about you and your blog and your goofy stuff, Blog Guy? Everything in the world?
Sure, now that you mention it. All I had to do was search our photo file for his name, and there he was. Meeting a foreign leader next to his ornate Kleenex box…
Hah..glad you like that! Shra, you should have said it’s fan-tase-tic. Would be more in character.
Oh, so this is a SERIOUS bike lane!
Okay, listen up, troops! I’ve got your duty assignments for the anti-Gaddafi army!
Smith, you’re riding in a tank. Jones, you’re a bombardier. Williams, you fire rocket-propelled grenades and blow up big stuff all day long. Johnson, you’re on Bike Patrol. Williams, you’re…
What is it, Johnson?
Well, you know, I mean it doesn’t sound very cool to just ride a bike.
Really, Johnson? But it’s a ten-speed two-wheeler, very shiny, and you get to shoot your AK-47 from the handlebars.
Looks like that one passed the test!
Sarge, look sharp. I’ve got a job for you.
Sure thing, Captain, Sir!
We’ve captured all these big weapons from the Gaddafi loyalists, and we need to test ‘em.
Can you take care of that? And start with that big anti-aircraft gun over there!
Jeez, Sir, I can only think of one way to “test” an anti-aircraft gun….
Well, then it’s a good thing we’re close to a civilian airport, right? Who’s your best man for the job, Sarge?
You’ve been upgraded to Gaddafi Class!
Blog Guy, I saw some photos of fugitive strongman Muammar Gaddafi’s private plane, taken at an airport in Tripoli. I’m surprised you didn’t blog about it.
Look, there’s something of a conflict of interest here. As you may have noticed, the plane was a Basler BT-70, built by “my company” for Gaddafi.
But we’ve established you don’t really have a connection to the genuine Basler Airlines.
That’s why “my company” is in quotes. We used Gaddafi’s design, which was problematic.
Why, what did he insist on?
Well, as you can see in the top photo, there’s the huge rollaway bed.
Gaddafi works out his issues
With boxes and boxes of tissues
While he wipes his nose,
He drinks much wine and goes,
“Ish not me! Ish you!”
Who has the worst taste on earth?
Knock-knock! Hello, are you Aisha, the daughter of fugitive strongman Muammar Gaddafi?
I believe I’m expected. I’m Lamar, the writer from “Extremely Poor Taste” magazine. I’m here for a tour of your home.
Oh yes, do come in please, Lamar. I’m so honored that your magazine is doing a cover story on my place, and I……
YOWZA! What is that big butt-ugly piece of furniture?
That’s just my golden sofa, with a golden statue of me, attached. Do you like it?
Libyan Goldielocks:
A different kind of taste,
Or the lack of it?
Sorting through Gaddafi’s knick-knacks…
Guys, listen up! We’ve captured some sort of depot and bunker that belonged to Gaddafi!
This is a great victory for us, but we need to sort through it. Lamar, you keep your squad here and make a list of everything you find.
Uh, sure, Boss, but there’s lots of strange stuff. What’s this gigantic tube thing here on the dirt?
That’s probably where he keeps his good carpets, all rolled up, Lamar. Just pry her open and have a look-see.
Well, okay. And look at all these big wooden shelves and cases. Any idea what that stuff is?
I suspect it’s Gaddafi’s famous knick-knack collection. You know, Hummel figurines, snow globes and what-not.You can probably just torch most of it.
Unca, you should have said that your products are endorsed and supported fully by Wile E. Coyote, from the Road Runner series. It would boost sales.
So you think you’re a tuft guy, huh?
Blog Guy, I need your help with redecorating our dining room.
We want something really new. You know, something dinner guests will remember.
I hear you. Get yourself down to a store called The Seat of Power and ask to see their dictator-themed dining room ensemble. It’s called the Martinet Set.
Martinet? Is that like Raisinette?
Not really. Martinets are authoritarians, and you can get a collection of dining room chairs representing famous strongmen. Hitler, Stalin, Saddam Hussein…
Why would I want such a thing?
Gassing Herr Hitler,
Them beans were simply lethal!
The dictator’s down!
Honk! Here comes the Muammar car!
As a highly paid political consultant, it irritates the heck out of me when clients ignore my advice.
What is Blog Guy’s first rule for politicians when they’re out in public?
Do NOT let them drive a car! It doesn’t give them the common touch, it doesn’t make them look macho, it just makes them appear truly goofy.
But it gets worse.
If you’re Muammar Gaddafi with a huge popular revolt on your hands, your minders should NOT let you drive a go-kart thingy with the label “Club Car” emblazoned across the front.
I mean, look at this. The guy isn’t even sitting right behind the wheel. It looks like he’s at Disneyland, about to take off on “Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride.”
Yes, you do, Csoap.. that is indeed Disneyland in the background…
Somebody get Csoap the doughnuts… Stat!!
-
Resident Oddly Enough blog Expert
-
Markel’s sure is a homely woman