Oddly Enough Blog

News, but not the serious kind

Tanks for nothing…

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THAILAND/

“This is General Johnson, come in Alpha Dog. Are the assault vessels in place? Roger that…

“Affirmative, we’re all set for the attack. I want you to deploy all 1,000 of our T-69 amphibious tanks and begin our surprise invasion. Push ‘em into the water, boys, now!

amphibious tanks splash 320“These amphibious assault vehicles will give us the edge we need, roaring out of the sea and onto the land before those poor bastards know what hit ‘em.

“This is our chance to teach them a lesson that… What, Lamar? No, that can’t be!

Sexy new car for the well-heeled?

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INDIA/

Blog Guy, I drive to my office, but I can never find a parking space. I know you’ve blogged in the past about innovations in urban parking, but I wonder if there have been any more advancements I can look forward to.

shoe car vertical 160As a matter of fact, yes. A company in India is about to market a car shaped like a shoe, so yo don’t even have to find a space. You just pull up, get out and wear it into work!

Top 10 stupid blog posts for July

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I just couldn’t be more proud.

VIETNAMFor July, readers of my blog continued to reveal their well-rounded, eclectic and sophisticated tastes by clicking in large numbers on a wide variety of useful topics.

They went for the arts – our item about Hell’s Orchestra – and travel, for our exposĂ© of brutal forced shopping in Hong Kong, and a God-awful idea for a tourist attraction.

With trends like that, who needs enemas?

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CHINA/

Blog Guy, my doctor says I have to get a colonoscopy. I understand it’s a really awful ordeal what with having to, you know, totally clean yourself out, and then go into the clinic and have an anesthetic and then they jam that thing you-know-where.

xray vertical 220Like most people, I come to you for all my tough medical questions. Is there an easier way to take this test?

Do WHAT to make my iPhone work?

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iphone bench 490

Blog Guy, I come to you for all of my gadget advice. I guess you know about the problems with the iPhone 4, what with that external antenna and everything.

iphone water 220I’ve tried holding it the way Apple says to, but I’m still losing calls. What else can I do?

Inmate Hamster, welcome to The Rock!

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PHILIPPINES/

Okay men, I have some good news and bad news for you from Warden Johnson, so listen up!

The good news is, from now on we’re gonna have electricity here at The Rock.

Lady, your chest is ringing…

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Blog Guy, I know you don’t care much about the World Cup, but I would sure like to go.

SOCCER-WORLD/So what’s stopping you?

Please don’t laugh, but I don’t know where I would put my cell phone.

I’m going to my Rotary Club, dear….

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CHINA/

Quick quiz: The guy in this picture is making…

CHINA/a) a helicopter-shaped ice sculpture

b) a helicopter-shaped lamp for his living room

c) a helicopter-shaped playhouse for his children

d) a homemade helicopter

As bizarre as it may sound, d) is the answer.

I blame myself. I’ve spent so much time in this blog warning about homemade submarines that I haven’t actually mentioned, if you’re going to go straight up in the sky in a vehicle, it should not be put together from crap in your back yard.

Kids, this especially goes for you….

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Gao Hanjie (top) installs the rotor blades on his homemade helicopter in Shenyang, Liaoning province, China, June 9, 2010. The graphic designer and helicopter enthusiast, with help from his friends, has spent more than a month building the helicopter. Gao claims he will eventually fly the contraption as a personal project, according to local media. REUTERS/Sheng Li

Bring me that one, the SAUCY wench!

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JAPAN/

Blog Guy, I have a problem. I love giving dinner parties, but I don’t have enough storage space in my kitchen for all of my pots and pans and cooking utensils. What should I do?

JAPAN/You’re in luck. There was just a fashion show that addressed this very need, for chefs who are under your kind of, uh, strain.

Going to Mars: Are we there yet? Are we there yet?

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RUSSIA/

Okay, this has got to be the most thankless job of the entire decade. These six astronaut guys are going to spend 520 days going to Mars and back.

That’s a long, long time to be away from family and cable TV and doughnuts and stuff, but this is how history gets made. This is how real pioneers rock ‘n’ roll.