Oddly Enough Blog
News, but not the serious kind
Quick quiz: a REALLY stupid place to pass out drunk is…
a) at your wedding, just before your turn to say “I do”
b) in a third-grade classroom, even if it’s the second time you’ve done that grade
c) at the annual Taliban Board of Directors meeting
d) in an anti-government street protest while shooting your slingshot at army troops
Yeah I know, you’re saying, “Well Bob, ALL of those places are pretty stupid,” which is true enough. But I’m going to go with the last answer, because that’s the one I have some photos of.
As you can see here, this protester couldn’t decide between having a few drinks or flinging stones at the soldiers, so he did both at the same time.
Okay sales staff, the big civil defense and security equipment exhibition is coming up, and we need to push our merchandise. Let’s brainstorm!
Boss, it’s me, Lonnie! What if we pass out glossy brochures about peaceful crowd control and stuff like that?
Quick quiz: The people in this photo are…
a) Trying some of that new Extreme Couples Counseling
b) Preparing for their first day on one of those government Death Panels
c) Wondering why it’s mandatory to own a gun just because they ride a Harley
d) Filming a low-budget Chinese remake of the classic movie “Bonnie and Clyde”
Blog Guy, I need some career advice, and you’re the expert. I’m artistic, and people say I have a good eye for design. I would enjoy working in developing countries.
Have you thought about the exciting field of confiscation design?
No. I don’t know what that is.
See, in places where officials confiscate a lot of guns and ammo from drug cartels, militants, etc., somebody has to arrange the stuff artistically for photographers.
Well, it’s time again for the big prize.
Regular readers know that every year on the day of the Oscars I take advantage of the frothing public interest in awards by presenting my own Irony Award.
That way, a few confused people Googling words like AWARDS and WINNER will wind up here on my blog, by mistake. By the time they figure out how to leave, I’ve got several more pageviews!
A reader writes, “Bob, I’m looking for a career, but I get bored reading all the fine print in online job postings. Are there any shortcuts?”
Well sure. What you do is set up a filter so that job descriptions containing certain words or phrases just don’t show up at all, thus freeing up much more of your time for watching “Starsky and Hutch” reruns. The trick is to block just the right stuff, so use my list, which is based on years of career advice.
A Reuters story from Moscow says about 100 modern Russian tanks have been discovered abandoned on the side of a road in the Ural mountains. There are video clips showing the tanks parked in long rows.
I’m not totally clear on how this happens. These T-80 tanks hold three-person crews, which means what? At some point several hundred soldiers walked into town for a drink or whatever, and then forgot where they parked?
Welcome back to another installment of our regular feature, “Stuff Maybe we Should have Explained in the Caption, but Didn’t.” We are told these officers are holding targets during a demonstration to demand “more resources to combat violence…”
Resources? What kind of resources?
Better training? It looks like not a single one of them seems to be able to hit a target. I say fire ‘em all and hire cops who can hit something!
I’ll tell you what, Earl, this ain’t good. When a tiger escapes from a zoo, somebody notices something like that!
I got it under control, Boss!
Under control? It’s Family Day here, a huge tiger is stalking the grounds looking for lunch, and it’s under control?