Oddly Enough Blog
News, but not the serious kind
Yule laugh, yule cry…
Blog Guy, what do you think is the biggest holiday for your blog?
Christmas, for sure. We celebrate it for most of the year. Not only that, we’re able to appreciate BOTH holidays.
You mean the religious Christmas and commercial Christmas?
No, I mean the magical goosebump childhood excitement Christmas, and the darkly absurd, “Look, somebody shot at Santa’s helicopter!” Christmas.
Well, those two aspects do fit together better than most people think, don’t they?
Indeed, it’s almost like “The Gift of the Magi.”
He’s making a list, and Czeching it twice…
Blog Guy, I need to tap your background in psychology. I can’t get my husband to enjoy the Christmas holidays. When he sees festive decorations he just breaks down and sobs.
Hmmmm. Did he by any chance grow up in Prague?
Why yes, he spent his childhood there!
I thought as much. Have a look at these photos from Prague, where revelers dressed as Saint Nicholas and a devil approach small children on the street and demand to know if they’ve been good or bad. It’s enough to warp any child for life.
You mean a child has to figure out what a saint and a devil are doing together, and then decide whether to tell them the truth about his behavior?
That’s about it.
Now that I am being laid off from my job as OE’s Taser Weilder and Zapper, I am sad.
However, until the last day of this blog (and my last day) you shall NOT learn and you shall NOT teach!
Any serious commentators are seriously, NOT welcome!
Have you never SEEN decorations, Mr. President?
Honey, was that the doorbell? Could you see who it is, please?
President Obama?
Yeah. He’s here for some kind of a surprise inspection of our Christmas decorations.
Oh crap, it’s decoration inspection time already? Quick, put a plate of shiny Christmas balls on the table, and I’ll get our holiday mugs. Maybe that”ll satisfy him.
Where’s that damned little tree, and that snowman for the wall?
When party smalltalk gets out of control
Blog Guy, I have a very specific fashion need and I hope you can help with it.
I go to a lot of very fancy affairs, but I have a tendency to say nasty things, and then other guests throw punches at me. What can I wear to protect myself at the holiday parties coming up?
Excuse me. Back up just a minute. You become SO offensive that upscale guests at festive Christmas parties want to punch you out? Is that what you’re saying?
Yes. I’ve never understood why they’re so sensitive, you stupid dumbass.
I think I’m starting to understand. Well, this season you’re in luck. Obnoxious women by the thousands have been flocking to a designer who makes this chic protective helmet called the “Holiday Punch Bowl.”
As you can see in these pictures, the headgear is stylish and alluring.
I am calling in all of the members of the OEB Extraction Team, including Shra, who is armed with her fabuluos Zapper!
We seem to have forced whoever was holding BG hostage to allow him to post again! However, it seems he is ending his career as The Funniest Blog Guy that ever existed!
Good job! Stand down, and have yourselves nice lives!
Commander UR
-
Resident Oddly Enough blog Expert
-
Why can’t a fallen angel like that fall in my room?