Oddly Enough Blog
News, but not the serious kind
Blog Guy, I just graduated from college and I’m looking for a job. A recruiter sent me a glossy brochure called “The Exciting World of Feeding Giant Reptiles,” and I wondered what you know about opportunities in that field.
Several recent grads have asked me the same thing. I’ve seen that brochure, with the folksy quotes from such legendary reptile feeders as Stumpy, Lefty and Elbow Willie.
While I understand the attraction of being able to put your hand in a blue plastic bucket of raw meat anytime you want, I just can’t recommend this career path.
The thing is, research is still being done on the subject of how far out of the water large crocodiles can leap, and there are indications that many of them have been holding back, if you catch my drift.
I see we have a story offering etiquette tips on how to dress for the office during the summer. This helps me a lot, because my “office” is in my home. My coworkers are two dogs and two cats, so I’m afraid my dress code may be slipping as the heat rolls in. I need some good advice.
“Sandals are iffy for men. Be sure your feet look and smell appropriate for business…”
The crew of a Basler BT-67 fixed wing aircraft releases oil dispersant over an oil discharge from the mobile offshore drilling unit, Deepwater Horizon, off the shore of Louisiana, in this May 5, 2010 photograph. REUTERS/Stephen Lehmann/U.S. Coast Guard/handout
Blog Guy! You won’t BELIEVE what I just saw! There was a picture of an airplane helping clean up after that oil accident in Louisiana, and the caption said it was a….
Blog Guy, it seems like mostly you write about jobs to avoid. How about some positive career advice? Aren’t there any GREAT jobs out there?
You bet, and here I’m talking especially to you men. Every major fashion show employs a Chest Checker, and if you can score one of these jobs, you’re set for life.
All you people who think I make up everything in this blog, check it out.
A real story, and much better than anything I could invent.
It turns out that over there in Denmark, several hundred employees at the Carlsberg brewery have stopped work for a couple of days to protest a company decision to limit beer drinking at work to lunch breaks.
I’ll let that sink in for minute. Some of the workers are cheesed-off because they can ONLY drink at lunch, instead of whenever they want, like they used to.
“Funny story, Hillary. Yesterday I found a secret stash in one of the White House cabinets that they said hadn’t been used since you and Bill lived there….
“I mean, this was some twisted stuff! I’m talking about a 1.75 liter bottle of creme de menthe, an old VHS set of the entire “Yogi Bear” cartoon series, an ‘I’M WITH STUPID’ t-shirt, a case of Hostess Twinkies…”
A reader writes, “Bob, I’m looking for a career, but I get bored reading all the fine print in online job postings. Are there any shortcuts?”
Well sure. What you do is set up a filter so that job descriptions containing certain words or phrases just don’t show up at all, thus freeing up much more of your time for watching “Starsky and Hutch” reruns. The trick is to block just the right stuff, so use my list, which is based on years of career advice.