Oddly Enough Blog

News, but not the serious kind

The last huzzah?

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So this is the end. The last post for this blog.

It’s a good thing we’ve said our farewells, because this is also the last day for new comments.

Today, this site freezes in time. You can always revisit it for a little nostalgia, like that old amusement park in the creepy part of town, with all the chains and cobwebs.

Former presidential candidate Herman Cain was fond of telling his supporters, “Stupid people are ruining America!”

Well, maybe that’s true, Herman, but stupid people also provide cheap entertainment, which is a useful service. We should thank them for it, without using any big words.

Nine things I’ll miss most about this blog

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Let’s get the sad news out of the way first.

After an exhilarating five-year run, this blog is ending its run here. Websites change, and take new directions.

The slightly better news is that we have a couple of weeks until my final post, so let’s have fun.

So I’m not the sexiest man alive?

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Boss, you got a minute for a private chat?

Sure Lamar, what’s up?

I’m kinda depressed. “People Magazine” just announced its “Sexiest Man Alive” choice for this year, and once again, it wasn’t me.

I can see where that would be a blow to somebody with your unusual looks, Lamar. Who got it this time?

Think she’ll notice if we take her purse?

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Lamar, where did you get the models for today’s fashion show?

From my psychiatrist. They’re all in therapy for various things, so they’re happy to have the work.

Therapy? Is it safe to have them here?

Oh sure, Boss, most of the ones with violent tendencies turned down the gig. My shrink says one of these chicks is being treated for narcolepsy.

The Runway’s Got Talent!

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It’s the same old story, Lamar. We’ve got a major fashion show today, but we can’t afford to pay professional models. You always manage to come through with models on the cheap. Any luck?

Don’t worry, Boss, I got us a good group today, and they’re free.

FREE? Huzzah! But how did you work that?

Oh. Well, they’re under the impression we’re having a reality TV talent show, so they each get to do a little “act” on the runway.

This train is bound for glory, this train

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Whoa! Did you see that, Clancy? Looked like Pope Benedict on that train that just went by!

Nah, it couldn’t have been, Lamar.That’s an express and the Pope takes the local.

Catching bayonets, what could go wrong?

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It’s not that I don’t think you know what you’re doing, but we hired you to spiff up our military honor guard with some great new moves, and I’m just not sure about your plan.

Trust me, I know what I’m doing.

Okay, I’m sorry, what was your name again?

Lamar.

Okay Lamar, so as I understand it, the honor guard marches up, stops, and everybody just hurls their rifles straight into the air, is that it?

Get a grip, models!

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Lamar, we’ve got another expensive fashion show to put on today, and our label is in the toilet. Have you found any more ways to save money? We just can’t afford a first class runway production.

Relax, Boss, I’m saving us a fortune.

Bless you, Lamar! How did you do it this time?

By not renting backstage dressing rooms for the models. You can’t imagine how much that saves!

Fashion models, name your poison…

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Here we go again, Lamar. We’ve got a major fashion show coming up, and the cost of paying good models would bankrupt us. Have you found a source for bargain-priced chicks, like you usually do?

I sure have, boss. I think you’ll be very happy.

So what’s wrong with this batch, Lamar? Are they zombies, genetic mutations, snake handlers, extremely moody….

Coming soon, the Sound of Stupid…

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Blog Guy, I just heard about an exciting project involving your blog. Can you confirm it?

Yes, the last two years of my blog postings are being released as Blogs on Tape, so folks can listen to them in the car, on dates, during court arraignments, whenever.