Sure, Doctor, I had a great childhood! I did all the usual stuff. Why do you ask?
Blog Guy, if my calendar is correct, you’ve got a major event coming up?
Yes, the celebrated Goofy Face Museum and Doughnut Shop, here in Washington DC, is ready to launch our big new season the day after Labor Day.
Hello, thank you for calling Lamar’s Fix-It and Fried Okra Shop. How may I direct your call?
Lamar, get in my office!
What’s up, Boss?
Look, you’ve had enough time! I told you if you want to make it in journalism, you need to hack into some voice messages, and I want to see what you’ve got. We’re on deadline!
Blog Guy, we all know you work with Lamar and your two dogs and two cats, but you hardly ever mention the rest of your blog staff. Give us some information about them.
Blog Guy, you run a fairly low-tech operation, right? I mean, there’s nothing complicated about doing a humor blog.
What is it, Boss?
There’s a really, really long, gross, black hair in my lunch! Where the hell did you go for this take-out?
Lamar, come to my office for a minute.
What’s this big stack of goofy photos I found in the wastebasket?
That’s just overflow, Boss. You know, we bought ‘em for the blog but then the writers couldn’t come up with anything clever.
Guys, listen up! We’ve captured some sort of depot and bunker that belonged to Gaddafi!
Okay, do I have to solve everybody’s problems all by myself?
We have a real news story saying more and more zoos are allowing visitors to spend the night, so they can learn “what happens when the gates slam shut, the sun goes down and the moon rises…”