Oddly Enough Blog

News, but not the serious kind

Remember to bring protection, honey

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Blog Guy, I’m worried sick! I heard there was some problem with protecting Paris Hilton. Is she okay?

She’s fine, but her bodyguards aren’t.

They were hurt while protecting her?

No, they were fired FOR protecting her. Our story, Elite Polish cops sacked for protecting Paris Hilton, says three police commandos were told to resign or they would be fired for serving as Hilton’s bodyguards during a recent appearance at a shopping mall opening.

Wow, that sounds kind of harsh. So what did they do wrong?

Well, I can’t be bothered to do research, so I’m just guessing here, but I imagine Poland must have a law against protecting Paris Hilton. I think a number of countries have similar laws.

No way! An actual law against protecting Paris Hilton! Do you think we should have a law like that here in America?

Today’s reading is from Shooteronomy

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It’s been a few weeks since I’ve written about any new signs of that onrushing Apocalypse, so I foolishly thought things might be getting better.

Let’s see here. Roman Catholic bishops in Wisconsin are urging their parishioners not to bring weapons TO CHURCH, now that a new law permits state residents to carry concealed firearms and electric weapons such as stun guns or tasers.

I Hope You’re Proud Of Yourself!

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Hey Blog Guy, it’s September 14th. This is the day you announce the coveted annual I Hope You’re Proud Of Yourself! award.

Yes, I’m sorry for the delay. I was all set to give this year’s trophy to the folks at that Tea Party presidential debate on Monday.

This gunman goes into a bar, see…

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I’m not sure when our state lawmakers ┬ábegan competing to pass the most wacky weapons laws, ┬ábut it’s getting pretty hard to keep up with them.

To recap, in recent days we’ve seen both Utah and Arizona vote to create official state firearms. Meanwhile, lawmakers in Maine voted to legalize switchblade knives, but only for one-armed residents.

Stilettos making a comeback?

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I just can’t make up stuff like this. I sure wish I could, but I can’t.

switchblade book 320Maine lawmakers have approved legalizing switchblades for people with one arm.

Our story says this will keep one-armed people from having to open folding knives with their teeth in emergencies. Really.