KRAMER: Mansiere?
FRANK: That’s right. A brassiere for a man. The Mansiere, get it?

Once again, pop culture was way ahead of what some folks like to call reality.

Everybody remembers the classic Seinfeld episode about The Mansiere.

Now, a Japanese online lingerie retailer is selling bras for cross-dressing men, and they’ve quickly become one of its most popular items. I am not making this up.

I just hope this thing comes with detailed instructions, because while most guys have had experience unhooking bras, actually fastening them is not something they’re familiar with.

Man bra slideshow Man bra video

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Above: Seinfeld screen grab

Below: Wishroom Representative Director Masayuki Tsuchiya puts on his company’s men’s bra in Tokyo November 22, 2008. REUTERS/Toru Hanai

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Congratulate me, Blog Guy!

Why?

I enlisted in the Navy!

Awesome. Which one?

There’s more than one?

Sure. There’s the regular U.S. Navy, and then there’s the Victoria’s Secret Navy.They’re both recruiting now.

And the difference? I’m afraid to ask.

Well, you know about the regular navy. Ships, planes, attacks, torpedoes, surface-to-air missiles…  But in the OTHER navy, you mostly ride around on yachts filled with Victoria’s Secret lingerie supermodels, taking them to different places in the Caribbean, opening champagne, slathering tanning oil on them, stuff like that.

Jeez Louise! Is it too late for me to…

Yep.

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Victoria’s Secret models arrive on a yacht to the Fontainebleau resort in Miami Beach November 14, 2008. REUTERS/Carlos Barria

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Blog Guy, your blogs about the lesser-known Olympics events have been eye-opening. Thanks for being the only one to write about Bare-Knuckle Self-Fighting, while the Mainstream Media just crams swimming down our throats. What else aren’t we seeing?

Well, I’m a huge fan of the Equestrian Jump-Over-it-Yourself event. This is where a horse gallops up to the fence, stops suddenly, and throws its rider over. It’s a very complex maneuver, and to get the most points, the riders have to look like they’re not expecting it.

Sheesh! I’m e-mailing NBC to demand coverage! Is there more stuff they’re hiding?

Absolutely. For instance, the so-called television coverage ignores my very favorite event, Women’s Stiletto-Heel Lingerie Slap-Boxing. You be sure to mention that in your e-mail to the network, and tell ‘em you saw it here.

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New Zealand’s Katie McVean falls off Forest after he refused to jump a fence during the equestrian jumping individual first qualifier at the Beijing 2008 Olympic Games in Hong Kong August 15, 2008. REUTERS/ Caren Firouz

Models play a game on the catwalk during “Hot in The City” lingerie collection in Sydney, August 15, 2008. REUTERS/Daniel Munoz

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Memo to comic book staff: Okay, we all know it’s getting harder to create an original superhero. But this new one is just too lame. I mean, Flying Lingerie Lady?

Anybody can see this isn’t a costume, it’s just skimpy underwear and some kind of cheesy wings that look like they were made from from a bunch of Kleenex! Who the heck wants to see Flying Lingerie Lady fighting crime in her silly Kleenex wings?

What? Oh. Hmmm. It turns out we’ve already sold the movie rights for eight million bucks before the first issue even comes out. Never mind.

Related post: I’m Toothache Man! You know the drill!

A model wears a creation from Indian lingerie design label ‘About U’ during a fashion show in New Delhi June 25, 2008. REUTERS/Adnan Abidi

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As you may have read, a woman is suing Victoria’s Secret because she says she was hurt by her thong panties when a metal clip holding a rhinestone flew off and hit her in the eye.

Personal injury is a very serious thing. Still, if this comes to trial she’s probably going to have to show how it happened in court. I can see lawyers, jurors and the judge all wearing industrial goggles to protect their eyes while the woman pulls on thongs every which way, trying to duplicate the sharp zing of flying rhinestones.

As a dedicated consumer advocate, I’ve tested odd claims before. You may recall Help me, I’m in a grape jam! If something bad happens, please explain to my family why I was found in a room full of extra large thongs, the walls pock-marked with staples and shards of imitation gems. They’ll want to know what happened.

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Model presents winged angel lingerie by Victoria’s Secret in 2000 file photo. REUTER/Fred Prouser

Brazilian model Adriana Lima poses with lingerie at a Victoria’s Secret store in 2004 file photo. REUTERS/Albert Ferreira

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Blog Guy, with food prices soaring all over the world, I’m curious about whether any country has been able to keep farming costs under control?

Yes, Switzerland has succeeded in keeping its young men and women very interested in staying on the farm, working long hours for low wages.

Their secret is a new concept called “lingerie farming,” in which farm chores are done in skimpy outfits. So far it’s been very popular, although skeptics do wonder how well it will work during high-altitude alpine winters.

Meanwhile, these attractive farmers and farmeresses have been chosen to pose for a risqué farm calendar called “Swiss Cheese!”

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Models pose during casting for the annual Swiss Farmers Calendar in the village of Seegraeben near Zurich, May, 2008. REUTERS photos by Arnd Wiegmann

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This company keeps trying to design bras that do something extra. You may remember their chopstick bra or their shopping bag bra or their get-out-the-vote bra. The new designs never generate anything other than free publicity, which duh, I guess is the point.

So this time it’s a solar panel bra which can recharge your cell phone or iPod. Of course, the bra needs to be exposed to light in order to work, and a chick walking around outdoors in an exposed brassière may have more serious problems than a dead phone battery.

And that’s not even to mention what happens when GUYS start walking around in giant man-bras to charge THEIR phones!

Video report…

Related post: Doc Jocks: what’s wrong with YOU?

A model displays lingerie maker Triumph International Japan’s “Photovoltaic-Powered Bra” during an unveiling in Tokyo May 14, 2008. REUTERS/Yuriko Nakao

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Quick quiz: The woman in this photo is…

• the spunky daughter from an affair between the Tin Man and Pippi Longstocking
• “Carley Marley,” from an all-female stage adaptation of “A Christmas Carol”
• rethinking her choice of a career as a refrigerator magnet
• about to spend the next 36 hours answering questions in airport security
• thinking, “Thank GOD nobody ever Googles the word lingerie!”

A model presents a creation from the Ultra collection during the Paris International lingerie show January 24, 2008. REUTERS/ Jacky Naegelen

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I honestly don’t know why we worry so much about protecting morons from themselves. Now there is a holiday list of the top 10 worst gifts for new relationships.

By using this list, a guy can learn that giving lingerie, gym equipment or a puppy to some woman he barely knows is not a good idea. But if he is that stupid, isn’t it better for the chick to find out right away? The list also warns not to give a ring, which is too personal, or a kitchen appliance, which isn’t personal enough… No kidding?

Guys, my advice is, just ignore the list. If you planned to buy a skimpy nightie or a diamond ring for some gal you just met yesterday, don’t let us stop you. And two words for a gift suggestion you might not even have considered: weed whacker.

While we’re on the subject of romantic gifts, you may want to have a look at Barely squeaking by on Valentine’s Day.

Merry first Christmas, honey! Model Karolina Kurkova walks the runway at the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show 2007 in Hollywood, California November 15, 2007. REUTERS/Mario Anzuoni

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What you see here is a medical breakthrough - lingerie which can instantly identify and diagnose hundreds of maladies. This young woman probably had no idea she was crazy, until she paraded in front of gawking crowds of spectators in her undies.

Other “models” at the medical convention were surprised to learn they had scabies, lactose intolerance and fear of circus clowns, at the same time the information was flashed on their behinds. The firm that owns the technology was asked why it was only using it in skimpy undergarments, and replied, “Just because.”

Okay, maybe this isn’t what’s really happening, but it’s more fun than just another fashion caption.

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A model displays underwear by Triumph during a show in Mumbai October 1, 2007. REUTERS/Arko Datta