Oddly Enough Blog
News, but not the serious kind
It’s time for another installment of our regular feature, Great Challenges in Marketing.
This time, we’re promoting a female-only island in Iran, announced this week. The idea is to give women a place to feel at ease in a culture where mixing with men in public is forbidden. Restaurants and other facilities will be staffed only by women.
Now, selling this idea to men would be pretty easy, what with guys being comfortable with the image of an island with nothing but women. But how do you sell women on a vacation with no prospect of romance or chemistry?
We’ve come up with two approaches: What doesn’t happen in Urumiyeh Lake Stays in Urumiyeh Lake, or We don’t have to build men’s rooms, so you save money! Feel free to do better via Post a Comment. Here’s the story:
Let’s all try to picture how this is going to go down. This oxygen bar in Belgium is featuring helium for Valentine’s Day, so couples can inhale it and say “I love you” in a high squeaky voice. I want to be there when the first guy surprises his soul mate with that one.
“Honey, I have a special treat! We’re going down to the bar, to say ‘I love you’ like cartoon characters! No chocolates this year, no red roses, no lingerie. But we get to sound like Alvin the Chipmunk when we exchange those three little words!”
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
And so are these pills
That I’m getting for you
I guess because not enough men are already taking the prescription drug Viagra, a drugstore chain in Britain is about to start selling the blue impotence pills over the counter, and they’ve chosen Valentine’s Day to begin.
Signs of the coming apocalpyse are increasing. For those keeping track, we recently had a Mr. Potato Head that needed security guards, and then there was the whole O.J. Simpson If I Did It book and TV show thing.
Now, from Amsterdam, comes news of a new reality show: a dating program for the visibly disfigured. A broadcaster is recruiting candidates for its Love at Second Sight show, due to be launched next month. ”Do you have a visible serious handicap and are you looking for a partner?” says an appeal on the Web site.
Shooting is underway on the long-awaited sequel to the 1984 Tom Hanks movie “Splash,” about a man who fell in love with a mermaid. Sadly, the original stars are not returning to the low-budget Hungarian-made sequel, and insiders don’t expect it to have the lustre of the original.
Wait, maybe that’s not what is going on here, but our actual caption doesn’t offer many clues as to why this guy is romancing seafood. Feel free to send us imaginative captions of your own via Post a Comment.
This bridal outfit, shown yesterday at a fashion show, is more practical than it looks. Brides like to keep their wedding dress forever, and that means a large cardboard box goes with you every time you move, year after year, until you die. By contrast, this ”gown” fits in a handy ziplock sandwich bag, where it can stay until you want to wear it to renew your vows 50 years from now.
A model presents a bridal outfit of Passion du Brasil collection during Bucharest Fashion Week in Bucharest November 27, 2006. REUTERS/Bogdan Cristel
If this catches on, the hot new pickup line could be “You gonna eat that pickle?”
Tired of looking for Miss or Mister Right over drinks or dinner? There is a new option. In the UK, a new dating site pairs off people working near each other, over lunch.
These people are at Germany’s Oktoberfest, which our caption calls ”the world’s biggest folk festival.” Now there’s a wonderful euphemism. Hey, Billy, will your parents let you bring that chick with all the staples in her lip over to my place on Saturday so we can get hammered? What? They only let you go to folk festivals? No problem!
People gesture as they drink in an Oktoberfest tent in Munich September 20, 2006. The Oktoberfest, the world’s biggest folk festival, runs from September 16 till October 3, 2006. REUTERS/Michaela Rehle
“The only thing your eyes haven’t told me is your name…” They must have told me your IQ, or I wouldn’t be using lines like these…
The fabled pick-up line. The single sentence that will melt a woman’s heart. Now, a publisher has printed the so-called top ten such lines, in several languages, so if they don’t work in English you can try in Czech, German, and so on, until the woman falls off her barstool with wine spritzer spewing from her nose.