Oddly Enough Blog

News, but not the serious kind

Earn big bucks without knowing anything!

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I swear, I don’t know why I keep getting suckered by these lame “list” stories. For instance, Ten Jobs that Don’t Require a Degree.

Please, let me save you the trouble of reading it. Basically, these are 10 jobs that may not require a college degree, but to get them you have to take really crappy entry-level jobs and work your way up, if you live long enough.

Still interested? I will hit the highlights. It says here you can be the captain of a commercial ship, enjoying “long hours of isolation or dangerous conditions.” After sugar-coating the job like that, the story says you don’t get to be a captain right away. No, you have to start as a deckhand.

I’m sure being a professional deckhand is a real chick-magnet, but I’m not settling for the first job on the list.

How the masses found Manassas…

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Blog Guy, I am really pumped about the Civil War 150th anniversary stuff coming up. Aren’t you?

You bet. I went to the Manassas reenactment over the weekend, and loved it! What I saw was First Manassas, as opposed to Second Manassas, which happened a year later.

So what’s the worst that could happen?

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Sarge, if it’s okay with you, I’m gonna take a little cigarette break.

Okay Lonnie, there’s not much goin’ on here right now. Say, are you just gonna stand that rocket-propelled grenade up on end like that?

Sorting through Gaddafi’s knick-knacks…

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Guys, listen up! We’ve captured some sort of depot and bunker that belonged to Gaddafi!

This is a great victory for us, but we need to sort through it. Lamar, you keep your squad here and make a list of everything you find.

Let me regalia with a story…

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Needless to say, we’re very excited about the big unveiling, Lamar. We hired you to design military uniforms for our newly independent country because of your reputation.

As the very best?

No, as the very cheapest. So let’s see what you’ve come up with.

Wow! I LOVE it! Braid, epaulets, sashes, brass buckles, kilts, spats, doodads, frippery, geegaws…

Why is there garlic on our ceiling, Honey?

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Hey Blog Guy, I know you love to cook and sometimes share culinary secrets.

Do you have a good recipe for homemade pesto? It’s the BEST sauce with fresh linguine!

I spoke to an Italian chef, and I think I can help you out. You’ll need a butt-load of fresh basil, some parmesan, pine nuts, garlic and olive oil. I’m going to make a trial batch in my own kitchen while I write this.

Welcome to the Grenade-o-Rama!

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First off, ladies and gentlemen, I want to thank you all for coming out to our sixth annual Grenade-o-Rama! I don’t know about you folks, but I think this is the best one yet!

Let’s also thank the ladies for the tasty deviled eggs and potato salad, which we should probably eat as quickly as possible considering it’s 110 degrees out here.

Shooting blanks from some hidden tanks?

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The captions on this series of photos say this tank, which is firing blank ammunition, is “releasing smoke bombs to hide itself” during war games.

Okay, somebody needs to step forward and tell the hard truth, and I guess it’s going to have to be me.

We can fix up this grenade, good as new!

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Blog Guy, I’m a recent college graduate who needs career advice. I picked up a colorful brochure entitled “The Exciting Field of Refurbishing Rocket-Propelled Grenades,” and I wondered if I should look into that.

A lot of grads are asking me that these days. It looks like RPG Refurbishment is attracting entry-level folks at a rapid pace.

Could this be how they tracked Osama?

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Blog Guy, you’re the only one I trust to come up with the real story on how they got Osama bin Laden. There has to be more to it than merely a decade of meticulous hard work by the military and intelligence agencies.

I can’t talk about it. It’s too sensitive.

Come on, Blog Guy. Look, I wouldn’t be online if I couldn’t keep a secret, and we’ve already established that it’s safe to put it in your blog, since nobody looks here.