Oddly Enough Blog
News, but not the serious kind
Blog Guy, can you settle an argument with the harpsichord player in my baroque ensemble?
Baroque ensemble? Harpsichord? Well at least this should be a little more high-class than most of the disputes I get.
She said she heard Prince Charles strangled this soldier with his bare hands, see, and that he…
Stop! First, Charles was wearing gloves. I don’t know how this “bare hands” thing even got started.
Blog Guy, we’re a whole month into 2011 and you haven’t spotted any new signs of that onrushing Apocalypse. Does that mean we’re out of the woods?
Far from it. I’ve just seen a very serious sign, but it’s so disturbing I’m still in shock.
I love this story. It seems some Mexican smugglers were planning to hurl drugs across the border, using an actual catapult. The Mexican military seized 45 pounds of marijuana and a metal-framed catapult, just south of the Arizona border.
I’m not making this up. The catapult is similar to those used across medieval Europe to fling fire, rocks and rotting corpses into towns under siege.
Okay Blog Guy, tell us the location of the troops…
No way! You’ll NEVER make me betray my country!
Oh, so you’re a tough guy, huh? Suppose we cram brussel sprouts down your throat and make you watch “Jersey Shore?”
It won’t work. I won’t sell out my friends. There’s nothing you can do!
U.S. Navy breaks railgun record
The U.S. Navy says it has shattered a record with its futuristic electromagnetic railgun by firing a projectile with enough force to launch 33 Volkswagen Beetles 100 miles all at once.
I guess I really don’t get out enough, because this video report, which I did NOT make up, is the first I’ve heard of the Navy’s so-called railgun project, with a logo and everything.
There’s a lot of complicated science news around, and I try to keep up with it so my readers don’t have to hurt their brains trying to understand. Here is some actual science stuff from recent days which may affect your life, so pay attention.
Let’s start with astronomy. How many stars would you say there are in the universe? A lot, right?
Blog Guy, I know you’re an expert on military tactics and strategies. What do you think is the most effective fighting force in the world today?
That would be China’s feared Commando-Style Commandos.
I’ve never heard of them. Are they lean and mean?
No, more like lewd and nude. They operate stark-naked, creating diversions to help the regular troops.
Lamar, get in my office! Isn’t Vasquez one of your men?
Yes, SIR General Johnson! What can I do for you, SIR!
What’s his problem?
SIR! There is no problem with Vasquez that I’m aware of, SIR!
Then where’s his camera? Doesn’t he know his commander-in-chief is speaking? Why isn’t he shooting photos like everybody else?
SIR, yes SIR! I believe Vasquez is a big fan of President Obama and wanted to concentrate on what he was saying, SIR!
Blog Guy, my college career counselor sent me to you. He said you keep tabs on the most interesting and unusual new jobs out there, and I definitely want to try something different.
Glad to help. I was just reading an online recruiting ad for door-to-door RPG salesmen. The pay is good, and that sales sampler you carry on your back is a chick magnet.