Oddly Enough Blog

News, but not the serious kind

Could any bull resist that face?

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SPAIN/

Blog Guy, I really admire your attitude. I read your blog every day, and you have something nice to say about everyone. I just wish I could have such a generous heart. How do you do it?

GERMANY/The trick is to have inner fricking peace. I mean, you need to realize that every human being is one of God’s creatures, and that…  OMG! Look at that dumbass bullfighter!

Excuse me, Blog Guy? You were saying something about inner peace?

How pompous do you have to BE to make a face like that? If there’s any justice in the world they’ll be sucking him up with a Wet Vac in Pamplona….

Er, I guess we all drift from the righteous path now and then, Blog Guy. But the main point is that…

You got a light for a lady spy, Blog Guy?

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Blog Guy, I may have the strangest fashion request ever.

FASHION-FRANCE/I doubt that. I’ve heard it all.

We shall see. My friends and I are World War I spies, um, in the Balkans. Yeah, that’s right, the Balkans.

Wait a minute. That’s almost 100 years ago. How are you talking to me?

Is complicated. There is no time. Please, it is urgent. Where can we find 1914 fashions in your world today?

Couldn’t she just do a floral tribute?

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Blog Guy, the World Cup is drawing to a close. So who would you say is the big winner so far?

Oh, without a doubt it’s model Larissa Riquelme, of Paraguay. Without leaving her hometown, she managed to mug her way into 24 pictures on our  photo file while her country was still a player.

Keeping tabs on the abs, Babs…

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SOUTHAFRICA/

Boss, We got trouble. BIG trouble!

What is it THIS time, Lamar?

SOUTHAFRICAOne of the male models got confused and wandered out on the runway almost naked. I think the women in the audience are gonna be pretty offended.

That’s awful, Lamar! They may get the vapors and faint. Is he wearing ANYTHING?

There’s lingerie in Paraguay?

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Blog Guy, isn’t it cool how Paraguay is hanging in there at the World Cup? How about some pictures of their loyal fans?

SOCCER-WORLDFans? I think there’s just the one.

Only one fan? For the whole country?

Apparently. You know that woman I blogged about with the interesting docking station for her cell phone? We’ve now had ELEVEN photos of her.

Are you wearing an AWNING, Lamar?

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TRINIDAD/Okay marketing staff, we’re riding the wave now!

Our recent decision to sell more fashions by inventing new items and creating a demand for them has paid off in solid gold with the Rube Tube and the Skanktop, but we’re not stopping there.

Ladies and gentlemen, I now give you the first wearable art.

It’s a colorful piece of canvas for men, with lots of straps and buckles, and you can wear it, sleep under it or hang it on the wall.

Just head for the sea, Lee, and dress like the Klan, Stan…

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FASHION/Blog Guy, my husband has a fashion problem, and I’m hoping you can help. See, he’s in the Klan, and…

Let me stop you right there. The Ku Klux Klan?

Sure. The Knights of the Ku Klux Klan. You know, the KKK.

Then he has a lot more than a fashion problem, lady.

See, there it is, that attitude! Your blog has given fashion help to  zombies, smurfs, firing squad victims, train robbers, satyrs, gladiators’ wives, but you draw the line at this, in spite of the Blogger’s Code.

Tased and confused?

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Okay fashion show staff, what the hell went wrong today?

Judging from the pictures of our presentation, the models were confused about which way to go, so they just stood there looking perplexed. The runway route must not have been made clear. Lamar, I blame you.

BRAZIL/Jeez, boss, if you look at this wide-angle shot you’ll see we marked the runway with thick black and white stripes. All they had to do was follow a straight line, then turn around and follow it back!

Unveiling the Rube Tube

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Okay marketing staff, times are hard. People aren’t buying enough of our regular fashions, so we have to invent NEW articles of clothing and create a demand.

BRAZIL/Now have a look at this brand-new thing here, for guys.

It’s like the opposite of a tube top. It covers your abdomen, but shows off your chest. It’s like a shirt, only different.

Your feet smell like rotting corpses, Ed!

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I see we have a story offering etiquette tips on how to dress for the office during the summer. This helps me a lot, because my “office” is in my home. My coworkers are two dogs and two cats, so I’m afraid my dress code may be slipping as the heat rolls in. I need some good advice.

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“Sandals are iffy for men. Be sure your feet look and smell appropriate for business…”