Oddly Enough Blog

News, but not the serious kind

Once upon a time, in a blog like this…

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Blog Guy, it’s me. Goldilocks. All grown up. Out here on the slag pile where fairytale characters go when they’ve outlived their usefulness. Wrung out, discarded like old porridge…

Yeah, I get it. What are you doing in this sleazy dive? What happened to the three bears?

SPAIN/

You can’t tell? They’re still with me. They’ll never leave. Baby Bear is now a grown-up chain-smoker with a gambling problem. All of us, wrung out, discarded, like…

Right. Like old porridge. Take a load off and look at some fashion designs for you and your three friends.

Her Majesty, the Queen of the World…

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GERMANY/Blog guy, please settle an argument I’m having with my friend.

Is there such a thing as the Queen of the World? My friend says yes, but I say no.

Of course there is. No offense, but you’re obviously a cheese-eating bonehead.

I see you’ve been shopping in Paris, Lamar…

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Dear Mr. Basler:

It’s me again, the actual attorney representing some men’s fashion designers. You will recall that my clients are outraged at the biased way you cover their industry, always making it appear their creations are not something regular guys would wear.

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Yeah, I remember you. Last week you demanded that I run the last three men’s fashion pictures from our photo wire, which I did, and they were beyond hideous. What’s eating you now?

Revenge of the designers from Hell

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Dear Mr. Basler,

FASHION-BRAZIL/I am an actual attorney representing several men’s fashion designers.

My clients are very offended by your frequent blog posts implying that the creative designs presented at major fashion shows are somehow goofy or stupid or psychotic.

The photos you choose to show in your so-called blog are in no way representative of our fine industry.

Fashion models add insult to injury…

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Lonnie, we have to talk. People have been losing interest in our runway shows lately, and I think I know why. Do you know why people come to fashion shows?

ITALY/Sure, Boss. To see the hot new clothes for the next season?

No! They come to be insulted. They want us to treat them like utter crap, so they can leave feeling totally degraded, and we haven’t been giving them enough of that.

Crack me another walnut, honey pie!

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Blog Guy, I have a fashion problem. Lots of times on a date a guy will offer me a walnut, but I never know how I’m supposed to crack it.

dumb shoes 260You came to the right place. Check out these designer shoes, made to meet all of a chick’s nutcracking needs. One good stomp, and you’ll be scarfing down tasty walnut bits for hours.

I love what you’ve done to your hair

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Okay fashion show staff, we’re still looking for ways to save money on these shows, and we think we’ve found a good way to curb the soaring cost of hair stylists.

BRAZIL/There is a group of folks who will work cheap, they are eager to learn and they have lots of time on their hands.

Car lovers, the new models are out!

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A number of readers have asked for coverage of the big International Auto Show now going on in Detroit. A regular reader named Just M. writes, “Bob, could I just bother you with a few shots of cars and everything motor? I’m a petrolhead, what can I say?”

I always pander to my readers, so sure, here are a bunch of shots from the Detroit show.

Nursery rhymes for trendy times…

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Little Bo peep has lost her sheep
And hopes that they haven’t got ill
If they are found, please send them down,
To Fashion Week in Brazil

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Jack Sprat could eat no fat,
His wife could eat no lean,
They had a daughter with an eating disorder,
Who modeled in a magazine

Up close and personal? Not so much…

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AUTOSHOW-INDIA/

Memo to Photo Editor: I’ve come up with a great scheme to cut down on costs associated with shooting big events like for example auto shows.

tiny model this 130Most of these venues have at least one or two unguarded rafter windows or skylights, so our photographers could just shoot through them from a distance instead of buying expensive tickets to get through the doors.