A reader writes, “Bob, yesterday I heard somebody use the expression ‘about as good as a Japanese pole vaulter.’ I’m too lazy to use Google, so can you please tell me what that means?”

Sure. This is a very common expression, and it’s pure sarcasm. It stems from the fact that while the Japanese are very good at many sports, for some reason they just don’t get pole vaulting.

This fact was made clear again today at tryouts in Tokyo for the upcoming 2009 El Paso Olympic Games.

A number of athletes had to be rescued from atop their poles, and a few had to have the poles surgically removed. It was not a pretty sight.

Get upgraded! join the Oddly Enough blog network

Members of the Edo Firemanship Preservation Association display their balancing skills atop bamboo ladders during a New Year demonstration in Tokyo, January 6, 2009. REUTERS/Yuriko Nakao

More stuff from Oddly Enough

Blog Guy, did I miss it? Have you announced the top five most popular items in your blog for August? I stayed home Labor Day Weekend just for this!

You didn’t miss anything - it was very close this time, and knowing that some people bet heavily on these results, we reran the data just to make sure.

Once again, a diverse spread of topics, from bicycle trees to tips on looking like George Clooney, to stuff from the Olympics. You may now collect your winnings.

Join the Facebook Oddly Enough Network

5. Mmmmm, ripe, juicy bicycles!

4. Stuff they don’t want you to see

3. Even better-looking in person!

2. I’m dropping my pants…

1. A very goofy photo opportunity!

More stuff from Oddly Enough

Blog Guy, you’ve been filling us in on the Olympics sports that nobody else covers. Tell us more!

There’s hot competition today for the Freakishly Grotesque Face event, as you can see in these training camp photos.

Wow, they’re hideous! How do they practice for an event like that?

Various ways. Some eat Brussels sprouts, some listen to Barry Manilow music. I know one who drinks Diet Dr Pepper for a face straight out of hell.

Ah, that makes sense. Who judges the event?

A panel of small children is forced to watch. The face that makes them scream and cry the loudest…

Join the Facebook Oddly Enough Network

Melissa Wu, REUTERS photo by Jason Reed

Dylan Armstrong, REUTERS photo by Ruben Sprich

Tony Jeffries, REUTERS photo by Lee Jae-Won

More stuff from Oddly Enough

Blog Guy, explain what’s so difficult about the javelin event. You throw a spear, right? Big deal!

It helps to know something before you shoot off your mouth. For starters, they’re tossing the javelins at a target. Usually a troupe of performing mimes. Those little mime dudes can scurry like cockroaches when javelins are coming at them.

Oh. Is that all?

No. The javelin throwers compete with their mouths full of butterscotch pudding. If they lose any of it, they are disqualified. So maybe if you can imagine the pudding and the mimes, you’ll have a new appreciation for this difficult sport. And did I mention the javelins are heated to 400 degrees?

Join the Facebook Oddly Enough Network

REUTERS photos by Mike Blake and Kai Pfaffenbach

More stuff from Oddly Enough

Blog Guy, your blogs about the lesser-known Olympics events have been eye-opening. Thanks for being the only one to write about Bare-Knuckle Self-Fighting, while the Mainstream Media just crams swimming down our throats. What else aren’t we seeing?

Well, I’m a huge fan of the Equestrian Jump-Over-it-Yourself event. This is where a horse gallops up to the fence, stops suddenly, and throws its rider over. It’s a very complex maneuver, and to get the most points, the riders have to look like they’re not expecting it.

Sheesh! I’m e-mailing NBC to demand coverage! Is there more stuff they’re hiding?

Absolutely. For instance, the so-called television coverage ignores my very favorite event, Women’s Stiletto-Heel Lingerie Slap-Boxing. You be sure to mention that in your e-mail to the network, and tell ‘em you saw it here.

Join the Facebook Oddly Enough Network

New Zealand’s Katie McVean falls off Forest after he refused to jump a fence during the equestrian jumping individual first qualifier at the Beijing 2008 Olympic Games in Hong Kong August 15, 2008. REUTERS/ Caren Firouz

Models play a game on the catwalk during “Hot in The City” lingerie collection in Sydney, August 15, 2008. REUTERS/Daniel Munoz

More stuff from Oddly Enough

Blog Guy, you mentioned advertising deals for some of the Olympic athletes. Any idea who will be the first one to do a commercial?

There’s a lot of secrecy of course, but I have spies at the big ad agencies. It seems a number of women weightlifters are already trying out for a laxative commercial, and I’ve even obtained some of the audition photos.

Eeewww! A laxative commercial? Why weightlifters?

See for yourself.  They have that constipated look, and then the camera will pull back to show them lifting weights, as a voice says “Don’t be a dumbbell, use our laxative…” It’s Madison Avenue at its most creative.

Join the Facebook Oddly Enough Network

REUTERS photos by Yves Herman

More stuff from Oddly Enough

Blog Guy, what’s it like when you win at the Olympics? I mean, do athletes go through physical changes?

For sure. Sports doctors say most athletes totally lose control of their tongue. You’ll see photos of winners with their tongues flopping like they just had a quart of Novocaine. This can last for months.

I had no idea! I always thought that was just because they’re obnoxious!

No, it’s involuntary. When the really big superstar Olympics winners are in TV commercials, they shoot them from behind or wearing ski masks, or sometimes they use a tongue stunt-double. Surely you’ve noticed that?

Join the Facebook Oddly Enough Network

REUTER photos: above, Arkady Vyatchanin by Jerry Lampen

below, clockwise, Stephanie Rice by Jerry Lampen, Arkady Vyatchanin by David Gray, Deborah Gravenstijn by Kim Kyung-Hoon and Leandro Guilheiro by Dylan Martinez

More stuff from Oddly Enough

Blog Guy, Thanks for covering Olympics sports like the Human Slingshot. Are there other sports the mainstream media hide from us?

Sure. There’s a whole dark underbelly of Olympics sports they don’t put on Wheaties boxes. Like Bare-Knuckle Self-Fighting, shown here. You should see how this guy looked after he defeated himself. If he wakes up, he’ll get a gold medal.

I had no idea! I’d love to watch that! What else?

Well, Olympic Dog-Boxing should get more attention, because dogs can beat the best human boxers. This year’s gold went to Chela. She could really give our human team some pointers.

Are you just saying that because Chela is a pointer?

Yeah, maybe. But I haven’t even mentioned the really violent event, Javalin Throwers vs. Synchronized Swimmers…

Join the Facebook Oddly Enough Network

Above: Spain’s Victor Tomas celebrates scoring during their men’s preliminary round Group A handball game against China at the Beijing 2008 Olympic Games August 14, 2008. REUTERS/Hannibal Hanschke

Below: Chela, a German Shorthaired Pointer, prepares to fight with boxing gloves before a demonstration in Lima, Peru, August 13, 2008. REUTERS/Pilar Olivares

More stuff from Oddly Enough

Blog Guy, it seems like all your VIP shots from the Olympics are of President Bush. You know, there are other important people there as well.

I’m from The Netherlands. I happen to know our Crown Prince William-Alexander is there, but you haven’t even mentioned him in your so-called blog!

Hey, calm down, Dutch Dude! When you’re right, you’re right. I asked our photo team in Beijing to get some pics - or maybe picks is a better word - and here is your prince multi-tasking at the Games.

Let me know if you want more.

Join the Facebook Oddly Enough Network

The Netherlands’ Crown Prince Willem-Alexander (R) and Crown Princess Maxima watch swimming events at the Beijing Olympic Games August 14, 2008. REUTERS/Kai Pfaffenbach

More stuff from Oddly Enough

Blog Guy, I know those Olympic athletes subject their bodies to a lot of torture. Which sport do you think is the most abusive? Weightlifting? Javelin? Discus?

None of those. It’s the often-underestimated Human Slingshot event.

The what?

It’s that one where swimmers stretch their rubber cap out as far as they can, then let it snap back to hit themselves in the head. They do it repeatedly, until only one is left standing. There’s no mistaking those big red welts on their ears and cheeks.

Wow, that’s harsh! What do they do to relax after THAT?

Well I’ll tell you, they sure don’t listen to an iPod!

Join the Facebook Oddly Enough Network

Jakob Johann Sveinsson of Iceland pulls off his swimming cap after competing in his men’s 200 meters breaststroke heat at the Beijing Olympic Games, August 12, 2008. REUTERS/ Wolfgang Rattay

More stuff from Oddly Enough