Oddly Enough Blog

News, but not the serious kind

Politics 2008! The MONSTER movie!

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Dr. Frankenstein: Perhaps I can help you with that hump.
Igor: What hump?

frankenstein-poster-160.jpgBreaking entertainment news! Hold on to your berets, NYU film students! It turns out that in their spare time, the presidential candidates have shot a remake of  Mel Brooks’ classic, Young Frankenstein!

As you can see in the studio photo below, Barack Obama is Dr. Frankenstein, and John McCain STEALS THE SHOW as his assistant, Igor.

I’m not saying who nailed the parts of The Monster and Inga, but with veep candidates Joe Biden and Sarah Palin also attached to the project, you do the math.

The new version opens on a dark and stormy night in Washington, DC. We see the White House in a violent thunderstorm. Suddenly, a massive lightning bolt silhouettes the Oval Office, and there, electrodes protruding from his forehead…

Not just another pretty face…

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Blog Guy, I was intrigued by your item this week on the Oddly Enough Goofy Face Museum and Doughnut Shop. Is that a real place?

mccain-1010-200.jpgIt’s as real as anything else you’ll read about in this blog.

I was wondering why you have John McCain but not Barack Obama?

Several readers asked about this. Obama doesn’t make goofy faces, at least not while we’re looking. Of COURSE we at the Museum and Doughnut Shop want to include him. We’ve even sent one of our Goofy Face Coaches to follow him around and offer some pointers.

Look! It’s old Maverick-Face!

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Blog Guy, does Republican candidate John McCain seem distracted these days?

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Yes, he has other stuff on his mind. He’s auditioning for a spot in the the Oddly Enough Goofy Face Museum and Doughnut Shop. He’s getting close, but isn’t quite there yet.

I’m not familiar with that institution.

It’s a VERY popular Washington, DC tourist attraction, right under the White House. We have 6,000 photos of famous people making incredibly goofy faces. And warm, tasty doughnuts, too!

I got your Publishers Clearing House check right here!

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obama-1013-3-180.jpg“Hi there young lady, is your mom at home? WHAT? You ARE the mom! Get out!

“I’m going door to door in your neighborhood today offering our Columbus Day special on vinyl siding. You’ve got a real nice home here, and it deserves to have that special vinyl look!

“Well, suit yourself. How about a new asphalt driveway? Body work on your car? A gas grill? Ginsu knives? Uh, Modern Boating Magazine? How are you fixed for brushes?

Candidates, you do the math!

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math-hand-160.jpgBlog Guy, are all the campaign debates over with now?

Of course not, italic font-using stranger! As the photos show, both candidates are busy prepping for the crucial Math Debate. The format is, they hold up fingers to answer math questions like, “If you are counting on six states but your opponent seems to be taking five of them away from you, how many do you have left?

I had no idea! So that will be the last debate, then?

No, there’s still the one next week in which all of the questions must be answered in Turkish.

What’s the danged deal on this thing, anyway?

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Blog Guy, I rely on you for most of my news on international relations.

That’s probably not a great idea.

bush-signing-face-160.jpgAnyway, I saw today that President Bush just signed something called the United States-India Nuclear Cooperation Approval and Non-proliferation Enhancement Act. What in the heck is that about?

Well, simplified, it’s an act designed to enhance the nuclear approval of non-proliferation cooperation between the U.S. and India…

Wait, monkey, some of my beer is missing!

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Blog Guy, I can’t get any respect! My boss says a monkey could do my job!

monkey-waiters.jpgCalm down, your boss is all wrong. Monkeys are animals, and they can’t do the jobs of humans. What is it you do for a living, anyway?

I’m a beginning waiter at a tavern. You know, I bring customers hot towels and stuff like that.

Politics: let the heeling begin!

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Blog Guy, a few days ago you did an item about how photographers cover the shoes of women candidates. I think you were just putting us on, and I’ll prove it. What kind of shoes did Sarah Palin wear at last night’s debate in St. Louis?

palin-shoes-1002-220.jpgThe highly technical term for those in the fashion industry would be reddish-brown shoes with high heels, made from some kind of reptile or something.

Take this job and Chuvit!

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chuvit-2-160.jpgToday’s topic is the media’s coverage of politics. In recent days we’ve heard our presidential candidates complain about “gotcha journalism” and other press tactics.

How do politicians show their frustration? Well, Chuvit Kamolvisit, a candidate in Thailand who was irritated by tough questions in a live television interview, physically assaulted the journalist.

The debate: No subtle rebuttal!

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Hey, Blog Guy! So, are you pumped for this debate tonight? Will it be dominated by the economy, foreign affairs or what?

debate-combo-this-240.jpgYou didn’t know? They’ve agreed to an all-out XTREME monster debate!. Look at this photo of the stage. The candidates will use backhoes, power drills, grappling hooks, flame-throwers…