Oddly Enough Blog
News, but not the serious kind
Class, get out your rulers…
Blog Guy, I’ve heard that the British Royal Family isn’t very well educated. That’s hard to believe, what with being the land of Shakespeare and everything.
Well, it turns out that when you spend all day changing into different costumes and hats and jewelry and stuff, your education can be neglected.
But to their very great credit, both Prince Charles and his wife, Camilla, have returned to what we would call grade school, to start over. I applaud them.
Here there are, on their first day, in a history class. Just think of it as Hogwarts, but with tighter security.
Do we have any idea what this history teacher is saying to Camilla in the photo?
I believe he asked her who won the American Revolution and she said, “The bad guys.” It’s going to be an uphill struggle.
Armored combat for the golden prize…
Blog Guy, everybody knows you’ve campaigned against bullfighting and other forms of animal cruelty. It’s safe to say that any event involving animal combat is inhumane, right?
Pretty much, yeah…
Pretty much? What does that mean?
Well, I must admit that now and then I fly over to Singapore to watch the Giant Tortoise Carrot Fights.
Giant Tortoise Carrot Fights?
Yeah, people gather around and two massive giant tortoises go after a carrot.
“Britain’s Prince Charles gestures as he watches a martial arts display…”
Is he REALLY imitating the moves he’s watching or is he about to hide his face from an approaching child screaming “Down with the royalty”?
Prince Charles makes gestures
while children practice kung fu:
He’s a quick learner!
‘Tis the season to be Charlie….
Blog Guy, you used to give us a lot more news about what those British people are up to, what with the royal wedding and everything. How about an update?
Well, they’re up to their knickers in celebrating Christmas now, of course, and they…
Excuse me, Blog Guy. Christmas? In July?
Yes. You’re forgetting about the time difference between the two countries.
Oh of course. Sorry, go on.
Yep, they opened the Christmas shop at Selfridges yesterday, selling Union Jack ornaments and everything.
Nope… fresh, stupid, human meat..
Get those people back who leave serious comments on the blog, wouldya BG?
Staying longer with a monger?
Blog Guy, it seemed to me that Britain’s Prince William and Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge, really had to do some silly stuff on their long trip to Canada.
I mean, cowboy hats, a stagecoach, canoes, stuff like that.
Don’t worry about William and Catherine. At least they managed to avoid visiting fishmongers, which is the worst royal duty there is.
Prince Charles’ wife, Camilla, wasn’t so lucky yesterday, as you can see in the photo on top. Looks like she’s about to make a run for it.
Why are fishmonger visits considered so bad?
Because of the horrible smell. It takes weeks to get it out of their royal clothing.
Heavens to Murgatroyd! Join the OE Blog Network already!
I guess it must be Sunday again?
Lamar, come to my office for a minute.
What’s this big stack of goofy photos I found in the wastebasket?
That’s just overflow, Boss. You know, we bought ‘em for the blog but then the writers couldn’t come up with anything clever.
So it’s the fault of the writers?
Of course, Boss. Isn’t everything?
evidently nobody will fall for the Prez’s “pull my finger” joke anymore
Let me regalia with a story…
Needless to say, we’re very excited about the big unveiling, Lamar. We hired you to design military uniforms for our newly independent country because of your reputation.
No, as the very cheapest. So let’s see what you’ve come up with.
Wow! I LOVE it! Braid, epaulets, sashes, brass buckles, kilts, spats, doodads, frippery, geegaws…
Was there any particular military unit that influenced you the most in your design?
Well, I wouldn’t wear these uniforms around the Salvation Army headquarters if I were you.
jclimaus, last I checked, it’s customary NOT to wear underwear underneath one’s kilt. Just saying…
You could almost pass for Prince Charles!
Ma, you wanted to see me?
Did you say MA? That is how you refer to the Queen of England now?
Sorry Ma, I meant Your Royal Highness, you wanted to see me?
Yes. We are very displeased! We have seen a popular blog using photos of you looking, how shall one describe it, GOOFY!
Yeah, Your Royal Highness, whenever I make a goofy face, they put me in that blog. I don’t even have to pay for it!
We are NOT amused! Remember Charles, you are the Possible Someday Future King of England, and you must act like it!
@69Spinster – Megabooth is a unique photo booth company. We built photo booths in the back of vintage cars and take them to all sorts of events, weddings, festivals etc.
We just so happen to be at the ideal home exhibition and some how managed to get Prince Charles in the booth.
Check out the website – http://www.megabooth.com
I say! I did not see you there, mon!
Quick quiz: These photos show Britain’s Prince Charles…
a) giving a soldier a fatherly lecture on the need to wash his hair more than once a year.
b) mistaking a camouflaged sniper for the Cowardly Lion, saying, “I LOVED you in ‘The Wizard of Oz.’”
c) mistaking a camouflaged sniper for a reggae musician, telling him, “Wi gwaan hab a bashment time, mon!”
d) mistaking a camouflaged sniper for actress Helena Bonham Carter, telling her, “I LOVED you in ‘The King’s Speech.”
I’m sorry, this was a trick question. It was e) all of the above. Everybody’s a winner this time.
The one guy I can always depend on…
Blog Guy, can you settle an argument with the harpsichord player in my baroque ensemble?
Baroque ensemble? Harpsichord? Well at least this should be a little more high-class than most of the disputes I get.
She said she heard Prince Charles strangled this soldier with his bare hands, see, and that he…
Stop! First, Charles was wearing gloves. I don’t know how this “bare hands” thing even got started.
Plus, he was only giving the guy a medal, not strangling him!
Oh. So, that’s different, then.
Chocolate sundae
With whipped cream and bananas
Fills Prince Charles with glee
The Goofy Princess Bride?
Blog Guy, I guess like everyone else you’re all caught up in Britain’s royal romance between Prince William and Kate Middleton, right?
If by “all caught up” you mean I’d rather be slowly disemboweled with dirty plastic picnic utensils than hear another word about it, then sure.
I thought the engagement might be important to you as observer of significant events that shape our collective destiny.
Oh, right. You mean regarding the Goofy Face Museum and Doughnut Shop? Yes, it’s early days yet, but I think we can work with Kate. We’ve taken some preliminary test photos, and she shows a willingness to explore her goofiness. I think she’ll be okay.
That’s wonderful. How can she improve on making goofy faces? After all, it will be a part of her royal duties for years to come.
I have two bits of advice for her.
Well I am sure all of us have a goofy face in us, somewhere!!!
Prince Charles rocks though…. and the British Public thinks it should be King William and not King Charles…
-
Resident Oddly Enough blog Expert
-
Good one Shra… he reminds me of Bilbo Baggins from LOTR.