Oddly Enough Blog

News, but not the serious kind

It’s like they always say…

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Hey Blog Guy, I just saw some new pictures of Jean-Marie Le Pen, that extreme right-wing French politician who once called the Holocaust a detail of history.

le pen 300I saw those, too. There’s been a transition of leadership in his party.

You know who he sort of looks like? That baseball guy, the former Dodgers manager Tommy Lasorda.

Yeah, I can see that, looking at them side by side. But the French guy is heavier.

No, I think Lasorda is bigger.

Huh-uh, Le Pen is much bigger.

You’re wrong. Lasorda is much heftier.

No, Le Pen is larger. I’m sure. It’s just like that famous old quote from that English author…

How did this fruitcake get a blog?

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blockade oranges this 490

Hey Blog Guy, I came by your house this morning but you weren’t at home.

No, sorry, I had a craving for navel oranges and went to the market.

ARGENTINA-FARMERSAh. Was it a fruitful trip?

No. Sadly, my quest for oranges was fruitless.

Why are oranges in short supply?

I believe there’s a navel blockade.

You mean a naval blockade, don’t you?

No, they’re blockading navel oranges on the highways, not on the waterways, so it’s not a naval navel blockade.

What about grapefruit?

That’s a second-rate citrate.

So what did you do, Blog Guy?

Well, you know my philosophy: when life hands you lemons, write a really dumb blog about oranges and then go have doughnuts.

Change the blog? Better latte than never

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VIETNAM

Happy New Year, Blog Guy. It’s me, your editor.

Hey, Boss. So the blog did great in 2010, didn’t it? The number two Reuters blog and 20,000 Facebook network followers… Onward and upward, huh?

VIETNAMEr, well, I wanted to talk to you about that. The publisher has a few ideas for tweaking your content slightly.

Love Hmong the Ruins, a very goofy year

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VIETNAM

After all the various lists of best stories and photos and signs of the Apocalypse and bad fashion and stuff, this blog all comes down to fun.

I just get a special enjoyment from doing some items, and I hope it shows. Sometimes it’s because people do real things that you would never imagine. Other times a photo or germ of an idea just makes me laugh and I take off with it.

You must be Round John Virgin?

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Blog Guy, somebody told me you’re working on a book.  I presume they meant you’re READING one?

Nope, writing one. I’m doing serious academic research into a fascinating subject.

A small Sunday giggle

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googol gargoyles

Blog Guy, I know you have a serious background in mathematics, and I wondered if you are familiar with the term googol.

Of course. It’s a number that is equal to 1 followed by 100 zeros.

SWIMMING/Thank you so much! Where can I get more information?

Well, you could Google it.

I could Google googol?

Yeah, you’ll find a gaggle.

A googol gaggle on Google? I have another question. Do you know who wrote, “Whatever you may say, the body depends on the soul”?

Opening a CAN of whoopass…

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james caan this one 490

Dear People Who Decide Film Awards:

I read that you’re giving a career tribute to that actor James Caan, at the Marrakesh Film Festival. What were you thinking?

MOROCCOI have nothing against the actor personally. I even saw those “Godfather” movies, but lost interest after Apollo Creed dropped out.

You need a semicolonoscopy, Blog Guy!

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Blog Guy, I represent some readers who want to talk to you about your punctuation.

My punctuation? But I’ve been on time nearly every day this week!

BRITAIN POLITICSThat would be punctuality. We’re more concerned about how you end sentences. You use way too many exclamation marks.

Quit Stalin, and show us the house!

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HUNGARY/

Blog Guy, your readers have grown very fond of Lamar, who shows up in this blog frequently. I know he’s never photographed, but maybe we could get some kind of behind-the-scenes look at his lifestyle or whatever. He has a lot of fans out here.

HUNGARY/Sure. Maybe you’d enjoy a tour of his elegant home. Welcome to Lamar’s living room…

You’re losin’ to a shrub, Bub!

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potted plant legs 490

Blog Guy, I’ve heard that you set up test races and stuff like that, so your readers can bet on what beats what? Do you still do those?

GAMES-ASIAN/Sure. I still have a little money left in my budget for the year. What would you like to see?