Oddly Enough Blog
News, but not the serious kind
Blog Guy, what can you tell me about that Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi guy, who seems to be involved in lots of controversy these days? Have you seen him speak in person?
He doesn’t give speeches. He does comedy shtick. He patterns his stage act after hip ’60s comics like Shelley Berman and Bob Newhart, with imagined telephone chats.
He’s hilarious! Well, uh, actually I don’t speak Italian, but I guess he’s probably okay.
Ah. And what’s this stuff about Berlusconi’s scandals involving young women? Any truth to that?
People say to me, “Bob, where do you GET those danged bizarre photos you use?”
I comb our daily photo file, but the weirdest ones are served up to me on a silver platter, in an “Extreme Monthly” selection of shots hand-picked by some really twisted minds on our photo desk. Here are some caption snippets from their latest batch:
That sure surprises me, but why are you bringing this up?
Because amid this wanton cesspool of harlots and floozies and doxies, I met two angels yesterday.
Hi, are you Liz? It’s me - Lamar – your Internet date!
So, at last we meet!. That’s quite an outfit, Liz. I guess you must have just come from some theatrical thing or something? Oh. You just came from the dentist, huh? Well…
I hope you like it here at Denny’s. Their country fried steak is… Excuse me, Liz, um, that little skull on your shoulder just said something to me.
Blog Guy, what is that actress Pamela Anderson up to these days?
Well, sure. Who looks at faces in Playboy, if you take my meaning? What does the magazine translate to in Serbian, anyway?
This brothel in Berlin has come up with a new marketing ploy in these tough economic times. It is offering a discount to patrons who arrive on bicycles.
Blog Guy, my mom told me to ask you about the birds and the bees.
She said you know a lot of stuff and you could explain it to me.
That’s quite a responsibility. I checked yesterday’s photo file, which is where I get most of my information, and I think I can help you.
It turns out, bees land on sunflowers in California to gather pollen, and birds sit in nests in Belarus. Does that do it for you?