Oddly Enough Blog
News, but not the serious kind
Blog Guy, I have a question about the whole Darwinism/creationism debate, and I know you are educated in both science and theology.
My problem is, I think both of those theories are kind of gross. I mean, amphibians, apes, men’s ribs, neanderthals crawling out of slime…
So where on earth did really attractive people come from? You think models like Gisele Bundchen evolved from a frickin’ chimpanzee?
You raise a very valid point, and timely as well. Runway models clearly evolved separately from regular mortals.
Our designer shoes are so uncomfortable, our models won’t wear them. As you can see here, they just take them off in the middle of the runway!
You’ve probably noticed that along with coffee, your local Starbucks is now selling CDs, books, medical equipment and automotive parts.
What does this retail giant have in store for us next? Well, Bucks just unveiled its new line of women’s clothes at Milan Fashion Week. Soon, chicks will be able to wardrobe-up from head to toe while ordering their caffeine fix.
Confidential memo to fashion show staff:
It’s no secret that Fashion Week has gotten too tame. There’s no surprise or drama anymore.
We aim to change that, starting now. You all have your assignments.
Kelli, you’re spreading splotches of Vaseline on the runway, right?
Lonnie, it’s your job to stretch a thin wire across the runway at ankle-level.
Has this ever happened to you?
You’re walking along in your high-top running shoes heading for the basketball court, when suddenly there’s a BEACH!
The tide is coming in. You’re going to have totally soaked footwear for the game, unless you’re wearing MODULAR SHOES!
Okay, design staff, we’ve got a huge honking problem with the fashion show! Our market research shows everybody thinks our new shoes suck!
This stuns me. You take our quilted red shoe, called “Sofa.” It turns out women aren’t so eager to be associated with a large overstuffed piece of furniture.
Blog Guy, I don’t know what to get my girlfriend for Christmas. Any suggestions?
Sure. How about buying her a Flagship?
Well, I just saw some photos that said Victoria’s Secret opened a new “Flagship store.” Judging from this picture, I gather a Flagship is a large pair of scissors.