Oddly Enough Blog
News, but not the serious kind
Blog Guy, I work for a bikini modeling agency that hires only gifted models.
That must be fascinating. What’s the latest methodology for telling if a bikini model is gifted?
I know you’re not gifted yourself, Blog Guy, but are you really that stupid? Look at the pictures. We have brightly-wrapped GIFTS attached to our heads. That shows we’re gifted. There’s no mystery.
It’s that easy? I’m stunned. What’s the name of this agency for models with gifts on their heads?
It’s called Presents of Mind. Pretty clever, huh? And we don’t just model, we also sing.
Blog Guy, I’m a very strict father with a parenting question. My daughter’s prom is next weekend, and…
Sorry to interrupt you, sir, but what kind of school has a prom in August?
It’s a summer school prom. Anyway, you know how kids behave at those things, and I’m afraid the boys will be trying to get her to do you-know-what. So I’m looking to find a prom dress that will keep her absolutely safe.
Blog Guy, my doctor says I have to get a colonoscopy. I understand it’s a really awful ordeal what with having to, you know, totally clean yourself out, and then go into the clinic and have an anesthetic and then they jam that thing you-know-where.
Like most people, I come to you for all my tough medical questions. Is there an easier way to take this test?
Lonnie, get your butt in my office!
What is it this time, Boss?
Exactly WHAT is going on out there in front of our corporate headquarters?
Just what you wanted, Boss! You told me to set up a Best Baby Sling Contest, remember?
I got 140 contestants, thousands of people in the audience, TV news crews are broadcasting it live, our company logo is in all the shots, and everything. It’s HUGE!
Okay, now I just feel like a total jerk.
We have a great story from Beijing about officials issuing an advisory on Hong Kong travel after a video surfaced showing tourists being insulted and “forced to shop” by a tour guide. I’m not making this up.
Indeed, the story says a 65-year-old tourist died from a heart attack in Hong Kong, after arguing with a tour guide over forced shopping there.
Blog Guy, I come to you for all of my gadget advice. I guess you know about the problems with the iPhone 4, what with that external antenna and everything.
I’ve tried holding it the way Apple says to, but I’m still losing calls. What else can I do?
Blog Guy, I saw some Reuters photos of street vendors in San Salvador, having a protest. There were THOUSANDS of them. How can there be so many street vendors in one city?
That’s easy. There are no indoor shops there. Everything is sold on the streets by vendors.
Do not adjust your monitor, these two guys have intentionally distorted eyes because, we are told, they are on trial and their faces have been blurred “in accordance with German privacy laws.”
Are you kidding me? Because it looks like the agency that did the blurring just phoned it in. Is there anybody who wouldn’t recognize these guys if you ever saw them again?